Your Ultimate Guide to Astarion's Romance in Baldur's Gate 3

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Learn how to date the sassiest member of your BG3 party
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In Baldur's Gate 3, Astarion is one of the companions you can recruit and even start a romance with. But how exactly do you woo this elusive, white-haired elf? It's not too difficult to do, but there are a few things you should know before you start, such as how to raise his approval and how to handle a few key interactions in the story. In this article, we'll go over how to romance Astarion from start to finish.

WARNING: This walkthrough contains a lot of spoilers for Baldur's Gate 3!

Romancing Astarion in Baldur's Gate 3

  • In Act 1, be supportive of Astarion and his desires and avoid acts of heroism to gain his approval.
  • In Act 2, speak to Araj Oblodra and Yurgir. Picking the wrong choices can cause Astarion to end the relationship or leave the party.
  • In Act 3, finishing Astarion's personal quest will progress the romance to its conclusion.
Section 1 of 4:

Romance Astarion in Act 1

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  1. 1
    Recruit Astarion. If you haven't already recruited Astarion, you must do so in Act One. He can be found standing west of the crashed Nautiloid. Once you approach him, a cutscene will play, after which you can recruit him to your party. [1]
    • Avoid doing things that will cause Astarion to leave the party to complete his romance. These actions will cause Astarion to leave the party permanently:
      • Act 1:
        • Giving Astarion to Gandrel in the Sunlit Wetlands (near where you find Ethel in the swamp)
        • Staking him and failing the strength check when he attempts to bite your character
      • Act 2:
        • Breaking Yurgir's contract in the Gauntlet of Shar and then failing the check to convince Astarion to stay
      • Act 3:
        • Interrupting him during the Ritual of Profane Ascension and failing the check to talk him down
  2. 2
    Raise Astarion's approval. Approval can be viewed by opening Astarion's character view menu. The approval bar will be located in the bottom-right part of the screen. Here are a few ways to increase Astarion's approval in Act 1: [2]
    • After discussing ceremorphosis with Gale or Lae'zel, talk to Astarion in camp (he won't have an exclamation point over his head). Agree to let Astarion kill your character if they turn into a mind flayer.
    • When Astarion wakes your character trying to drink their blood, choose the option that says your character trusts him. Then, choose the option to let him drink their blood. Both of these options will raise Astarion's approval.
      • If you don't stop Astarion when he's drinking your character's blood or you fail the check twice consecutively to stop him, your character will die. If you have recruited other characters besides Astarion and have them use a revival scroll or speak to Withers to resurrect your character, you'll lose approval with Astarion.
    • After learning that Astarion is a vampire, he will approach your character at camp, musing about what the other party members' blood tastes like. If your character helps him theoretically choose his next meal, you will gain approval.
    • When encountering Gandrel, the Gur located near Auntie Ethel's teahouse, allowing Astarion to kill him will raise his approval. Your character must know that Astarion is a vampire to get this option.
      • When talking to Gandrel, ask what he is hunting, and choose the line "Only a spawn?" Astarion will drop hints or simply ask to kill Gandrel. If you approve, you'll immediately fight Gandrel, and Astarion's approval will rise.
      • You don't have to kill Gandrel to romance Astarion, if you'd prefer not to.
    • Allow Auntie Ethel to escape when fighting her. It doesn't matter if she takes Mayrina or not.
    • Give the Necromancy of Thay book to Astarion.
    • Interrupt the Bugbear and the Ogre in the barn outside the Blighted Village (or allow Astarion to do it).
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  3. 3
    Spend the night with Astarion before the camp celebration (optional). If you reach 40+ approval with Astarion before the camp celebration after fixing the goblin camp/druid grove situation, you can have a romance scene with him. However, this is not required to complete his romance.
    • If you reach 40+ approval with Astarion before the camp celebration, he will approach your character and ask them to spend the night together. If you agree, a cutscene will trigger during the next long rest.
    • During the first part of the cutscene, Astarion will ask your character to confirm that they're actually interested in sleeping with him. If you agree, the cutscene will proceed. You can get additional approval by choosing the option to offer your neck to Astarion (if your character knows he's a vampire).
    • In the second part of the cutscene, Astarion will be shirtless, revealing a scar on his back. You can discuss the scar, but it doesn't garner any approval or disapproval.
  4. 4
    Speak to Astarion often. Whenever you long rest, speak with Astarion to learn more about him and to trigger more camp cutscenes. There are a number of camp cutscenes that do not give any approval, but they are crucial for understanding him, his desires, and his motivations.
  5. 5
    Rescue the grove or side with the goblins and trigger the camp celebration. Whether you save the tieflings and the grove or you join the goblins in destroying them, you can progress Astarion's romance.
    • If your approval with Astarion is in the "Good" range, he will proposition you to spend the night together. If you agree, the same cutscene from Step 3 will play if you have not already slept with Astarion before the camp celebration.
    • If you've already slept with Astarion, he will try to persuade you to sleep with him again. If you agree, there is no additional romance scene, however.
      • If you instead choose "I think it's better if we leave last time as a once-off," the relationship will immediately end.
      • Once your character has slept with Astarion, you have entered the "dating" relationship stage. [3]
    • If you don't end up getting the romance scene with Astarion before ending Act 1, the scene from Step 3 can still trigger in Act 2, once you reach the appropriate approval rating.
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Section 2 of 4:

Romance Astarion in Act 2

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  1. 1
    Speak with Araj Oblodra in Moonrise Towers. There are two major impacts on Astarion's romance in Act 2, and one of those is the conversation with Araj Oblodra, a drow located in one of the rooms in Moonrise Towers. Araj wants Astarion to bite her so she can examine vampire bites up close, but Astarion is not interested in doing so. [4]
    • When prompted, do not let Astarion bite Araj. If you force him to do so, he will break off the relationship entirely. [5]
  2. 2
    Kill Yurgir in the Gauntlet of Shar. You can do this by completing the quest "Kill Raphael's Old Enemy." Astarion will make a deal with Raphael that if he kills Yurgir, Raphael will tell him about the scars on his back. [6]
    • Yurgir is located in the eastern part of the gauntlet. You will have to progress a decent amount through the gauntlet before you can talk to Yurgir.
    • To avoid any approval loss, choose the option to immediately attack Yurgir. If you do so, you'll have to fight Yurgir, the Merregons, and Nessa the Displacer Beast.
    • You can alternatively choose to persuade Yurgir to kill his followers and then himself, but this will cause Astarion to disapprove.
      • If you start "Breaking Yurgir's Contract" and fail the check to keep Astarion in the party, he will leave the party for good. [7]
  3. 3
    Raise Astarion's approval. To progress Astarion's romance, you should aim to raise his approval to 70 or higher. Once you've reached this threshold, you'll get a cutscene at camp where your character and Astarion confess deeper feelings for one another. Here are a few ways to raise his approval in Act 2:
    • When Jaheira gives you the truth-serum wine at Last Light Inn, refuse to drink it to raise Astarion's approval.
    • When speaking to Disciple Z'rell in Moonrise Towers, choose the option that says "Show her your lusts for Astarion" to distract her. This doesn't progress the romance, but it will get you approval with Astarion.
    • If you haven't gotten the scene where your character sees Astarion's scars by this point, Raphael will show up and show them to the party, then mock Astarion. If you pick the option about Cazador's cruelty after Raphael leaves, Astarion will approve.
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Section 3 of 4:

Romance Astarion in Act 3

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  1. 1
    Complete Zethino's love test. In the Circus of the Last Days, there is a dryad named Zethino who will give you and Astarion a love test if you pay the fee. While any answer you pick will progress the test, some options will have a better approval rate than others (and some will cause Astarion to lose approval). Gaining or losing approval at this point isn't very important to the questline, but regardless, here are the best choices for each question: [8]
    • Question 1: "When he's elbow-deep in gore." (+1)
    • Question 2: "Me." (+2)
      • You can alternatively pick "Revenge." for +1 approval.
    • Question 3: "Breaking a nail." (+2)
      • You can alternatively pick "Most things fear him actually." for +1 approval.
  2. 2
    Fend off Astarion's siblings when they attack at camp. After resting a few nights in Baldur's Gate, the party will be ambushed at night by some of Astarion's siblings, other vampire spawns created by Cazador. During and after the fight, do not choose any dialogue option that insinuates that Leon and Aurelia can take Astarion back to Cazador. If you do, and you fail the check to persuade Astarion that you were kidding, he will break off the relationship. [9]
  3. 3
    Complete Astarion's personal quest. To do this, you must confront Cazador, Astarion's master. After killing Cazador, there are six possible endings for Astarion's personal quest, "The Pale Elf:" [10]
    • Ending 1: Convince Astarion not to ascend. You must pass a DC 18 Persuasion check to do this. Alternatively, you can do a DC 20 Insight check, then a DC 15 Persuasion check.
    • Ending 2: The ritual can't be completed due to one or more spawns dying, or the player character not being present. Astarion will not ascend, but with different dialogue from ending 1.
    • Ending 3: Refuse to help Astarion ascend. This ending can happen if you choose it, or if you fail any of the Persuasion checks from ending 1. Astarion will permanently leave the party if you choose this ending.
    • Ending 4: Start the ritual, but interrupt before it's completed. This will cause Astarion to turn hostile and attack the party.
    • Ending 5: Help Astarion ascend. He will become a Vampire Ascendant.
    • Ending 6: Astarion asks a companion for help. This can occur if your character is in wild shape or if they are dead/downed. Minthara and Dark Justiciar Shadowheart will help him; all other companions will refuse, causing Astarion to leave the party.
      • Whether Astarion becomes a Vampire Ascendant or not, he will still remain in a romantic relationship with your character. However, there are two ways for Vampire Ascendant Astarion to break up with your character after this point: if they refuse to become his vampire spawn, or if they become a Mind Flayer before the final fight with the Netherbrain.
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Section 4 of 4:

Approval & Disapproval List

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  1. 1
    Approval To gain Astarion's approval, it's important to be supportive of him, his wants, and his condition. [11] While it's a little easier to gain his support if you act in evil ways, you can definitely earn his approval even if you aren't evil at all.
    • Supporting his desires and vampirism
    • Allying with evil-aligned creatures
    • Being ruthless and cruel to weak creatures
    • Appreciating the arts
    • Being demonstrative of your power
    • Allowing him to bite you
    • Gaining information
    • Helping others when profit is to be made
  2. 2
    Disapproval Astarion disapproves of weakness, restriction, and random acts of kindness. [12] However, getting disapproval isn't always a bad thing when romancing Astarion, and some moments of disapproval may lead to Astarion changing his viewpoint and outlook later on.
    • Helping the weak
    • Showing restraint
    • Judging him and his vampirism
    • Acting heroic
    • Restricting his autonomy
    • Refusing to gain power
    • Acts of kindness with no reward
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      References

      1. ↑ https://bg3.wiki/wiki/Astarion#Recruitment
      2. ↑ https://bg3.wiki/wiki/Astarion/Romance#Act_One
      3. ↑ https://bg3.wiki/wiki/Astarion/Romance#Relationship_stages
      4. ↑ https://bg3.wiki/wiki/Araj_Oblodra
      5. ↑ https://bg3.wiki/wiki/Astarion/Romance#Act_Two
      6. ↑ https://bg3.wiki/wiki/Kill_Raphael's_Old_Enemy
      7. ↑ https://bg3.wiki/wiki/Break_Yurgir's_Contract
      8. ↑ https://bg3.wiki/wiki/Zethino
      9. ↑ https://bg3.wiki/wiki/Astarion/Romance#Act_Three
      1. ↑ https://bg3.wiki/wiki/The_Pale_Elf
      2. ↑ https://bg3.wiki/wiki/Astarion/Approval
      3. ↑ https://bg3.wiki/wiki/Astarion/Disapproval

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