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The best dental jokes & puns to make your patients smile
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Looking for a floss-ome joke to share with your dentist or patients? We’ve got you covered! In this article, we’re providing the ultimate list of dentist jokes, puns, and one-liners to make everyone smile. Whether you’re waiting for your appointment or preparing to see a patient, you’re sure to find a tooth-ally awesome joke below.

Best Dentist Jokes

  • What is a dentist’s favorite animal? The molar bear.
  • What do you call a dentist who doesn’t like tea? Denis.
  • What kind of teeth can you buy with a dollar? Buck teeth!
  • Why did the lumberjack go to the dentist? He had a cavi-tree.
  • Why did the detective go to the dentist? To get to the root of things.
  • What’s one word you never want to hear from your dentist? “Oops.”
  • Why should you be kind to your dentist? Because they have fill-ings too.
Section 1 of 10:

Funny Dentist Jokes

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  1. Have everyone grinning from ear to ear with these funny dental jokes. A funny joke can help lighten the mood and make dental appointments more enjoyable. Here are some abso-tooth-ly hilarious jokes for dentists and patients: [1]
    • What’s a dentist’s favorite store to buy clothes? Gap.
    • What did the lion eat after it had its teeth taken out? The dentist.
    • Why did the dentist say to the computer? “This won’t hurt a byte.”
    • Why did the detective go to the dentist? To get to the root of things.
    • What’s one word you never want to hear from your dentist? “Oops.”
    • What’s a dentist’s favorite idiom? Put your money where your mouth is.
    • What job did the dentist have when she was in the army? Drill sergeant.
    • Why did the vampire’s breath stink so badly? Because he had bat breath.
    • What are the 6 most dreaded words in the world? The dentist will see you now.
    • What’s the most popular state for dentists to move to when they retire? Fluorida.
    • What did the patient say when the dentist said she needed a crown? “I know, right?”
    • Why does your tongue hate going to the dentist? It always leaves feeling depressed.
    • Why did the dentist take up gardening? Because he wanted to brush up on his roots!
    • Why did the dentist have a TV on the ceiling for patients? So they could Netflix and drill.
    • What’s the number one reason patients don’t show up for root canals? They lose their nerve.
    • When should a snowman make an appointment to see the dentist? When he gets frostbite.
    • Why did the patient start shouting after he left the dentist’s office? He just had all caps put on his teeth.
    • Why is the Securities and Exchange Commission investigating the dentist? He was accused of incisor trading.
    • What did the judge say to the dentist? “Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?”
    • Why does the dental staff always go to the dentist with their problems? Because she gets right to the root of things.
    • Why is it sometimes necessary to get a second opinion from a dentist? Because each dentist has their own floss-ophy.
    • What’s the difference between a dentist and a New York baseball fan? One yanks for the roots, the other roots for the Yanks.
    • How many dentists does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to administer the anaesthetic, one to extract the light bulb, and one to offer the socket some vile pink mouthwash.
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Section 2 of 10:

Short Dentist Jokes

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  1. Share a bite-sized joke when you need a quick laugh. Looking for a short joke that still packs a punch? Here are some simple and effective jokes to make your dentist, dental hygienist, or patient laugh: [2]
    • What did the Dentist of the Year get? A little plaque.
    • What’s a dentist’s favorite kind of boat? A tooth ferry.
    • Why did the vampire get braces? To improve his bite!
    • Why did the tree go to the dentist? To get a root canal.
    • What do you call a dentist who doesn’t like tea? Denis.
    • What kind of teeth can you buy with a dollar? Buck teeth!
    • What’s another name for a dentist’s office? A filling station.
    • How did the dental hygienist land a job? By word of mouth.
    • What’s a drill team? A group of dentists who work together.
    • Why did the smartphone go to the dentist? It had a Bluetooth.
    • What is it called when an astronaut gets a cavity? A black hole.
    • Why did the pharaoh go to the dentist? Because Egypt his tooth.
    • What does a dentist do when the plan lands? She braces herself.
    • What did the brass player buy at the drugstore? A tuba toothpaste.
    • What’s the most popular hiking trail for dentists? Mount Brushmore.
    • Why did the FBI raid the dentist’s office? To perform a cavity search.
    • Why did the dog trainer go to the dentist? One of his canines was loose.
    • What movie do dentists watch over and over again? Plaque to the Future.
    • What did the lawyer demand before the dentist worked on him? A retainer.
    • What did the dentist say to the golfer with a cavity? “You have a hole in one.”
    • Why was a Toronto dentist in Panama? He was searching for the Root Canal.
    • What do false teeth have in common with stars? They only come out at night.
Section 3 of 10:

Long Dentist Jokes to Tell in the Waiting Room

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  1. Share a longer joke to lighten the mood before your appointment. Got a bit of time on your hands? Tell a longer dental joke to fill the time and reduce your anxiety in the waiting room: [3]
    • A patient asked the dentist if it wasn’t nasty to spend the day with the hands in someone’s mouth. The dentist answered, “I just think of it as having my hands in their wallet.”
    • A young girl was talking to her dad about what she wanted to be when she grew up. She was thinking about becoming a heart doctor or a tooth doctor. “Dentist,” said her father. “Why?” the little girl asked. “We only have one heart, but we have 32 teeth.”
    • A young boy was sitting in the waiting room for a little bit after getting his tooth pulled. The receptionist asked him if he was ok. “Yes, but I didn’t like the bad word the dentist used while he was pulling my tooth.” “What did he say?” asked the receptionist, worried. “Oops.”
    • The dentist told his patient to open wider. “My goodness!” he said. “You’ve got the biggest cavity I’ve seen, the biggest cavity I’ve seen.” “Ok,” said the patient, “but I’m scared enough. Do you need to repeat yourself?” “I didn’t,” said the dentist. “That was the echo.”
    • Fred’s mother was on the telephone to the boy’s dentist. “I don’t understand it,” she complained, “I thought his treatment would only cost me $20, but you’ve charged me $80.” “It is usually $20, ma’am,” agreed the dentist, “but Fred yelled so loudly that three of my other patients ran away!”
    • On Monday I said to my boss, “I’ve a dentist’s appointment this afternoon. Can I leave at two and make up the time later in the week?” “Yeah, that’s no problem,” he said. On Friday he came up to me and said, “What’s this? You’ve put on your timesheet that you finished at 5 o’clock on Monday.” I replied, “Yeah I know. I told you I’d make the time up.”
    • While I was waiting to see the dentist, a woman came out of his inner office smiling. Nodding to me, she said, “Thank goodness my work is completed. I’m so glad to have found a painless dentist and one who’s so gentle and understanding too.” When seated in the dentist chair, I related the incident to the doctor. He laughed and explained, “Oh, that was just my Mother.”
    • A man coughed violently, and his false teeth shot across the room and smashed against the wall. “Oh, dear,” he said, “whatever shall I do? I can’t afford a new set.” “Don’t worry,” said his friend. “I’ll get a pair from my brother for you.” The next day the friend came back with the teeth, which fitted perfectly. “This is wonderful,” said the man. “Your brother must be a very good dentist.” “Oh, he’s not a dentist,” replied the friend, “he’s an undertaker.”
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Section 4 of 10:

Dentist Jokes for Kids

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  1. Tell a clean dental joke to charm kids of all ages. Going to the dentist can be a scary experience for kids, but sharing a funny joke can lighten the mood and distract them. Here are some clean and funny jokes to make kids smile: [4]
    • What’s a dentist’s favorite dinosaur? Flossosaurus.
    • What is a dentist’s favorite animal? The molar bear.
    • What’s the best day to go to the dentist? Tooth-day.
    • What do tooth fairies use to communicate? Bluetooth!
    • Why did the queen go to the dentist? To get a new crown.
    • Where did the orca go to get his braces? The orca-dontist.
    • Why did the doughnut go to the dentist? He needed a filling.
    • Why did the lumberjack go to the dentist? He had a cavi-tree.
    • Why did the toothbrush go to school? To brush up on its studies!
    • What kind of filling did the little girl want for her cavity? Chocolate.
    • What does a dentist do when he’s on a roller coaster? Brace himself.
    • Why should you be kind to your dentist? Because they have fill-ings too.
    • What does the dentist give a bear with a hurting tooth? Anything it wants.
    • Why did the dentist become a baseball coach? Because he knew the drill!
    • What kind of music do kids with traditional braces listen to? Heavy metal!
    • What’s a dentist’s favorite emote to use when they play Fortnite ? The floss.
    • What did the kid dance before bed? His dentist told him to floss every night!
    • Why are potatoes a dentist’s favorite vegetable? Because they are so filling.
    • Why did the Stormtrooper want his teeth whitened? To get rid of the dark side.
    • If a kid has 25 candy bars and they eat 23 of them, what do they have? Cavities.
    • Whose job is the most dangerous in Transylvania? The dentist who works on Dracula.
    • How do you know the Tooth Fairy is a journalist? They’re always searching for the tooth.
Section 5 of 10:

Dentist Jokes for Adults

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  1. Crack up adults with a cheeky or relatable dental joke. Looking for a dental joke that’s spicier? The following jokes are clever, slick, and slightly naughty, perfect for parties or flirty banter in the chair: [5]
    • Why do teeth move? Shift happens.
    • What’s a dentist’s safe word? “Plaque!”
    • What’s a dentist’s favorite type of foreplay? Oral examination.
    • Patient: Is this procedure going to hurt? Dentist: No, I won’t feel a thing.
    • How can a dentist take time off? They get someone else to fill in for them.
    • Why do dentists make great lovers? Because they know all the right spots to drill.
    • Why did the tooth fairy go to a psychologist? Because she no longer believed in herself.
    • Dentist: Do you floss? Patient: Religiously. Dentist: Really? Patient: Of course, every Christmas and Easter!
    • What did the 90 year old say to his great-grandson? “I miss the days of being your age when my teeth were in my mouth 24/7!”
    • Patient: Doctor, if I give up candy, pizza, popcorn and gum, will my braces come off sooner? Dentist: Not really. It will just seem longer.
    • Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused to have an anaesthetic injection when he was going for a filling? Apparently, he wanted to transcend dental medication.
    • Patient: How much does it cost to have a tooth pulled? Dentist: $100. Patient: All that for only a few minutes of work? That’s expensive. Dentist: Don’t worry, I can pull it out slower if you’d like.
    • Patient to Dentist: “How much to get my teeth straightened?” “Twenty thousand dollars,” says the Dentist. The Patient heads for the door. Dentist to patient: “Where are you going?” Patient: “To a plastic surgeon to get my mouth bent.”
    • Dentist: Can you please help me? Scream as loud as you can, like you’re in a lot of pain. Patient: Why? My tooth isn’t hurting this time. Dentist: Because there are many patients in the waiting room, and I don’t want to miss the game!
    • One night, as a couple lay down for bed, the husband gently taps his wife on the shoulder and starts rubbing her arm. The wife turns over and says, “I'm sorry honey, I've got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow and I want to stay fresh.” The husband, rejected, turns over and tries to sleep. A few minutes later, he rolls back over and taps his wife again. This time he whispers in her ear, “Do you have a dentist appointment tomorrow too?”
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Section 6 of 10:

Teeth Jokes

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  1. Make everyone smile with these terrific teeth jokes. From fillings to root canals, there are tons of teeth terms and procedures that make the perfect punchline. Here are some floss-ome jokes to break out the laughs (and smiles). [6]
    • What are dental X-rays called? Tooth pics.
    • What type of bear has no teeth? A gummy bear.
    • Why did the deer need braces? He had buck teeth.
    • What’s the best time to go to the dentist? Tooth hurty.
    • How does a dentist fix a broken tooth? With toothpaste!
    • What do you call a boat filled with dentists? A tooth ferry.
    • What is the dentist’s favorite day of the week? Toothsday.
    • Which teeth do you need to brush? The ones you want to keep.
    • Why don’t teeth ever get lost? Because they always come in pairs!
    • Why should you be true to your teeth? So they won’t be false with you.
    • Why does the ant hang out at the bakery? Because it has a sweet tooth.
    • What did the dentist shout in the courtroom? “You can’t handle the tooth!”
    • Why did the dentist and her boyfriend break up? They fought tooth and nail.
    • What does a dentist give a bear with a terrible toothache? Anything it wants.
    • What do you get when you cross a hedgehog with a giraffe? A long-neck toothbrush.
    • Why was the god of thunder so quiet after he got his tooth pulled? Because he was too Thor.
    • What did the tooth say to the dentist before he left for vacation? “Fill me in when you get back.”
    • What did one tooth say to the other? “Get your cap on…the dentist is taking us out tonight.”
    • Why did the yellow tooth not find the white tooth’s jokes funny? Because he was already dead inside.
    • Did you see the new documentary about wisdom teeth on Netflix? It’s called An Inconvenient Tooth .
Section 7 of 10:

Teeth Puns

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  1. Share silly tooth pun to bring the dentist office down. If you have a dentist appointment coming up, try slipping in one of these enamel-zing teeth puns. They’re the perfect way to make your dentist laugh and make the whole situation a bit more fun: [7]
    • Brace yourself!
    • Grin and bear it!
    • You’re floss-ome!
    • Plaque to meet you!
    • The molar the merrier.
    • Let’s play tooth or dare!
    • You’re un-filling-gettable!
    • The molar of the story is…
    • I’m feeling migh-teeth today.
    • Tooth be told, you’re amazing.
    • I get to the root of the problem.
    • We’ve got a bite-sized problem.
    • Let’s not tooth-pick every detail.
    • I’m not lion, you’ve got great teeth!
    • You’re tooth much for me to handle!
    • I’m feeling tooth-tally awesome today!
    • Bracing for impact always starts with brushing.
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Section 8 of 10:

Dentist One-Liners

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  1. Get the laughs going with a hilarious quip or one-liner. Dropping a witty remark is a great way to break an awkward silence and lighten the mood. The next time you visit your dentist, try one of these funny lines before or after they work on your teeth: [8]
    • Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth.
    • My dentist removed the wrong tooth. It was acci-dental.
    • Dentists practice their trade by going through many drills.
    • Ten years without brushing causes a horrible tooth decade.
    • He said to put my money where my mouth is, so I got gold fillings.
    • My wife, who was a dentist, passed away. I’ve loved and I’ve flossed.
    • They called him the king of dentists because he specialized in crowns.
    • Until it came out in conversation, no one knew she had a dental implant.
    • My dentist asked me to open up, but I don’t know him well enough to confide in him.
    • My teeth were stained, so my dentist asked me if I smoke or drink coffee. I told him I drink it.
    • I have no idea why some people hate going to the dentist so much. In my experience, it can be very refilling.
    • You know the toothbrush was invented in Kentucky. If it was invented anywhere else, it would be called a teethbrush.
Section 9 of 10:

Dentist Knock-Knock Jokes

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  1. Drop a knock-knock joke to tickle everyone’s funny bone. Some knock-knock jokes have a bad wrap for being corny and cliché, but we promise you’ll find a funny option you’ve never heard below. Here are the best dentist knock-knock jokes to have everyone rolling on the floor: [9]
    • Knock-knock. Who’s there? Gum. Gum who? Gum on, open wide!
    • Knock-knock. Who’s there? Root. Root who? Root canal? I hope not!
    • Knock-knock. Who’s there? Al. Al who? Al be flossing every day now!
    • Knock-knock. Who’s there? Drill. Drill who? Drill you be my dentist forever?
    • Knock-knock. Who’s there? Filling. Filling who? Filling fine, what about you?
    • Knock-knock. Who’s there? Tank. Tank who? Tank you very much for flossing!
    • Knock-knock. Who’s there? Drill. Drill who? Drill I ever stop making dentist jokes?
    • Knock-knock. Who’s there? Gums. Gums who? Gums and see the dentist already!
    • Knock-knock. Who’s there? Dishes. Dishes who? Dishes the dentist—open wide!
    • Knock-knock. Who’s there? Dish. Dish who? Dish is how I talk since I lost my tooth.
    • Knock-knock. Who’s there? Tooth. Tooth who? Tooth be told, I hate dentist appointments!
    • Knock-knock. Who’s there? Floss. Floss who? Floss me once, shame on you. Floss me twice, shame on me.
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Section 10 of 10:

More Hilarious Jokes

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  1. Check out these other funny, cheesy, and pun-filled jokes. Want to keep the fun going? Here are some other joke articles to make your friends and family laugh out loud:

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