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Here’s a thread for all people LGBTQIAPD+ and cisgender/heterosexual/heteroromantic allies. You can chat about ongoing LGBT issues around the world, or simply about your own discovering of your true orientation, or about coming-out experiences, anything. You can also ask for advice! Just make sure you don’t spread any sort of hate or phobia or any kind of negativity about any LGBT person or identity. I hope this thread becomes a safe place for people to talk!

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Feel free to start discussions!:slight_smile:

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I admire @Fangirl1710 for being brave enough to start this thread.

Starting the first discussion - wikiHow articles need to be more gender-neutral…

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True. I come across a lot of articles, especially ones for people who were AFAB (assigned female at birth) about puberty and similar things, and for people who are questioning their gender identity or don’t identify as female, the articles are simply not as gender-inclusive as they should be.

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Not just that. Neutrality in general is an issue on wikiHow articles.

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I agree 100%.

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All different types of people are reading these articles, so let’s try to make them neutral so that everyone can read them.

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Agreed! This had to be said, and I’m so glad you brought it up.

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Ah…random post here, though I’m supposed to sleep in a bit.
I’m a transgender person (FtM) and I’m also bigender and bisexual and biromantic (hattrick, I know.:wink:)(demigirl and demiboy)(more attracted to males still)
Would it really make sense to call myself femme? Because I identify with that a bit.

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I was just reminded of my old posts where I said I was gay, and I find it so weird. I haven’t considered myself that for a long time.

When I was younger, despite acknowledging other identities, I always assumed I was gay because I knew I wasn’t attracted to boys, so I assumed then I must have been attracted to girls. It was hard differentiating between different types of attraction. I feel aesthetic and platonic attraction to all genders, but nothing more than that.

I do wonder what age it is that I can actually call myself “aromantic asexual”, because I feel it might be easier to understand what you do feel, rather than what you don’t feel.

I’ve never actually been that out in real life, only online. In real life, I just consider myself an “ally”, but I don’t feel anyone would mind if I did come out.

I don’t know why there is so much taboo about coming out as one thing, and then realising that you are something else. Sexuality and gender aren’t always so clear-cut. It is totally okay to test out different labels and see what fits.

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I’m questioning my sexuality and gender. :P.

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Congrats!

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I’m 25. I was 12 when I started questioning and came out at 15. I was never bullied or faced with denial or opposition during my upbringing. I spent all of my adulthood fully out and free and so far have never been a victim of a hate crime. Given that I grew up in the ghettos, I could have easily been assaulted, but I was lucky not to have been.

My boyfriend is 33. He’s only partially out (as in only to his family and close friends). He was bullied growing up and at one point during his early adulthood he was physically assaulted after he was seen emerging from a gay bar. Because of that he’s really guarded about his sexuality. Smooches and hand holding in public is out of his comfort zone. Understandably he’s scared and paranoid of being a hate crime victim once again. It’s that mentality of “I don’t know what other people are thinking of me”, which as a person with social anxiety I totally get.

Just a couple weeks ago on my last shift at my previous job we had a potluck and I invited him. He was nervous about meeting my coworkers but participated and brought food because he knew how important it was to me. I had already started referring to him as “my boyfriend” so my coworkers were already familiar with him. We all had a good time and there wasn’t any fear or judgement at all - just a bunch of people chilling out and talking. Given how guarded he is, that day was a baby step towards him wanting to feel more free and comfortable and he appreciated that a lot.

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Time to write approximately twenty-eight paragraphs on my past experiences as a member of the LGBTQ+ community.

I’ve known I wasn’t cishet for a while now, however, I do believe that I wasn’t cis or straight before I knew that I wasn’t cis or straight.

When I was a toddler, I always liked more “masculine” things, especially clothes. I remember my favorite t-shirt was a grey one with a depiction of Perry the Platypus on it. However, when I entered grade school, I begged my mother for pink dresses and claimed to like Disney princesses and all that jazz just to fit in.

At around the age of 8, I would always roleplay on Animal Jam as a guy. My fake name was Kayden, and I was… an emo. I’m honestly glad my emo phase was years ago. Anyway, sometimes I’d try to online date other girls (cringey, I know). It didn’t feel wrong by any means.

Before I got my first period, I would wonder if, by any chance, I was a guy all along. I didn’t know about the differences between “female” and “male” genitalia. I heard that when my chest started to grow, it would make me feel “sexy”. It did not. In fact, they just felt like (and still feel like) grotesque lumps that bounced whenever I walked.

I’ve been trying out different labels for my sexuality and gender since I was about 12. At first, I thought I was bisexual. After that, I started to assume that I was pansexual, then lesbian. When I was 13 or 14, I came to the conclusion that I was in fact bisexual.

For my gender, it’s a little more complicated. When I was 13, I thought I was nonbinary. Then, I thought I was cisgender, a demigirl, cisgender again, a demigirl again, nonbinary, genderfluid, and now I’m testing out the label of “FtM transgender”, and I think it might stick.

Honestly, I prefer the statement “This is Ezra, heis male” over “This is (Deadname), sheis female” by a landslide. And honestly, “This is Ezra, theyare nonbinary” doesn’t fit well either.

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Advice is gonna be darn well appreciated.
Anyone?
^.^

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Great!:slight_smile:
Feel free to ask any of us for help if you need it. I have a few resources which helped me as well!
:>

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(Don’t click the blur if you don’t do well with triggering topics)

So a group of random people made a Google Meet and invited me. We ended up playing Kahoots and “confessed” things in them, and eventually I ran out of things to confess other than coming out as demiromantic and that I’ve struggled with self-harm but there was no way I was going to say that , so I had to do that. No one knew what it meant, and they had no response when I said the definition. That may seem like a bad thing, but I’m actually very grateful that it turned out that way. It was kinda a test to see how people would react, and I’d say it went alright since no one hated on me. Sometimes silence can be better than saying something in response.

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a lil random post (typing in all lowercase for the heck of it asfg)-i ordered a chocolate cake with a rainbow inside (like the layers are rainbow colored), i hug my female friends for a bit long and i stare at women the same way i stare at men. i can’t believe the whole world doesn’t know i’m bi yet. especially my family. i think they suspect it but they still haven’t said they know so yeah. lol.

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I figured out I was bi when I was 12, and trans when I was 13. I did come out as other things at various points in my teens (mostly as lesbian, genderfluid, and asexual) that I’ve since retracted, since most of those were me trying to figure things out. I do wonder if I may be somewhere on the asexual spectrum, but seeing as I can be sexually attracted to people, I don’t feel I need to put a word on it. Frankly, I’m fine just being the guy who can’t do hookups, because it doesn’t require a ton of explanation.

Now I’m 20. I feel a lot better about it than I did when I was younger, because I don’t feel like my gender and sexuality are defining components of myself; they just exist. I feel more secure in asserting myself and I don’t feel like I’m going to get questioned all the time. It’s not something I want to scream from the rooftops, but at the same time it’s not something I feel I constantly have to defend.

These days I feel comfortable and safe and accepted, but I think with all the uncertainty I was feeling back then, I really shut out and hurt a lot of people who wanted to help me. Everything back then felt unstable and scary for multiple reasons and I’ve just kind of learned to coexist with some of that uncertainty. Back then I didn’t know how to do that, and assumed everyone was going to hate me. I wish I had given more people the benefit of the doubt back then. Some people were really, truly terrible, but I think most were just unsure or uneducated. Most people have been able to accept that I’m the same person and that I’m not really all that different from them. I may well just be lucky, and I know not everyone has the circumstances I do, but I hope more people are the type to come around even if confused. I know now that not every instance of misgendering or confusion is meant maliciously, and that people can change their tune on things, even if it takes several months or years (and feels like an eternity).

I wish I could go back and tell my younger self that it’s not always going to be about gender and sexuality, that it’s okay to be unsure, okay to be feminine or feel different some days, okay to let it go and ignore someone who’s trying to be a jerk or pick your battles and not try to be the Queeropedia. Nowadays I’m not so focused on who I am, I’m more focused on what I do. And it feels a whole lot better to me than trying to valiantly defend myself for things I shouldn’t even have to be defending.

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oof some people don’t expect people for who they are soooo yea.

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