180+ Fish Jokes, Puns & One-Liners for All Ages

Looking for a fish-tastic joke to reel everyone in? We’ve got you covered! In this article, we’re providing the ultimate list of fish jokes, puns, and one-liners to crack up your kids and adults. Whether you’re a fish lover, a die-hard angler, or just someone who appreciates a solid dad joke, here are some shell-arious fish jokes to make you smile from gill to gill.

Top-Tier Fish Jokes

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
What do you call 2 barracuda fish? A pairacuda.
How do you tuna fish? You raise or lower the scales!
Why did the fish blush? Because it saw the ocean’s bottom.
What do Timon and Pumbaa order in restaurants? Tuna piccata!
What music should you listen to while fishing? Something catchy!
Why do fish live in salt water? Because pepper makes them sneeze!

Section 1 of 10:

Hilarious Fish Jokes

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Drop a funny fish joke for a tidal wave of laughter. Fish swim, breathe underwater, and stare into space (er, the sea), making them the perfect punchline for a variety of jokes. Here are some shell-arious fish jokes for kids and adults: ^{[1]
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- What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
- What kind of guitar does the fish play? Bass.
- What do whales eat for lunch? Fish and ships!
- What do you call 2 barracuda fish? A pairacuda.
- How does a shark greet a fish? “Pleased to eat you!”
- What kind of fish only comes out at night? A starfish!
- What did the fish say when he gave up? “Oh, whale.”
- What day of the week do fish dislike the most? Fryday.
- What do you call a fish that’s switched on? A sam-ON!
- Why don’t salmon watch cable TV? They prefer streams.
- How do you make a goldfish old? You take away the “g.”
- Why did the fish blush? Because it saw the ocean’s bottom.
- How do you spot a cinderella fish? They have glass flippers.
- What do you call a fish who practices medicine? A sturgeon.
- What’s the name of the secret agent fish? Pond. James Pond.
- Why don’t fish like playing basketball? They’re terrified of nets.
- Why did the fish get bad grades? Because it was below sea-level.
- What do you call a salmon that sets a good example? A roe model.
- What did you think of the series fin-ale? Well, it wasn’t the bass-ed.
- Why do fish live in salt water? Because pepper makes them sneeze!
- What did the fish say when he was accused of hitting his brother? “Not gill-ty!”
- What did the fish say to his friend who was acting super shy? “Stop being so koi.”
- How can you tell a puffer fish has had too much salt at dinner? He looks blow-ted!

Section 2 of 10:

Fishing Jokes

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Joke about fishing for a boatload of belly laughs. There are so many unexpected things that can happen when fishing, which means you need a joke that’s just as surprising to reel-y split some gills. Here are the best jokes to make a splash and impress all your angler friends: ^{[2]
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- Where do fishermen go to get their hair cut? The bobber shop.
- What kind of fish should you use to catch other fish? Beta fish.
- How do you catch a Swedish fish? With a gummy worm as bait.
- What music should you listen to while fishing? Something catchy!
- What did the fisherman say to the magician? “Pick a cod, any cod!”
- What do librarians take with them when they go fishing? Bookworms.
- What did the fish say to the fisherman? “No one will ever believe you.”
- Why couldn’t the troll catch any fish? Because other people took the bait.
- Why did Batman stop taking Robin fishing? He kept eating all of the worms.
- Why should you never invite a DJ to a fishing trip? They always drop the bass.

Section 3 of 10:

Fish Puns

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Throw out a gill-iant pun to get the giggles going. Tons of fish names sound like regular words, making them super easy to turn into punchlines! Here are some iconic puns that put a fishy spin on classic phrases and idioms you love: ^{[3]
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- Holy carp!
- My nemo-sis.
- Sole survivor.
- Krill out, man.
- That’s gill-iant!
- Heart and sole.
- Bubble-teamed.
- You’re fin-ished!
- Long time no sea!
- It cod be worse….
- Any-fin is possible.
- I’m hooked on you.
- For heaven’s hake!
- That’s de-bait-able.
- Don’t trout yourself.
- I’ll see myself trout…
- Salmon had to say it.
- Aiding and a-bait-ing.
- You’re kraken me up!
- You’re talking pollucks!
- I’m a bit hard of herring.
- Quit floundering around.
- This isn’t the plaice for it.
- Cod this be any punnier?
- That was pretty koi of you.
- You need to take a krill pill.
- I laughed, just for the halibut.
- Thanks for the oppor-tuna-ty!
- I’ve been herring all about it…
- I’ve haddock with these jokes!
- Give yourself an upper cut-tlefish.
- I wouldn’t be cod dead in that outfit.
- Mom, I’ve met the gill of my dreams.
- You really need to scale up your puns.

Section 4 of 10:

Fish One-Liners

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Bring the boat down with these fishy one-liners. Hold onto your flippers and get ready to bubble over with laughter…these one-liners are ab-sole-lutely hilarious! Try any of the following lines to showcase your sense of humor and reel someone in: ^{[4]
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- My pet fish is a gamer. His favorite game is COD.
- If you can think of any more fish puns, let minnow.
- Nice try…I’m not about to take the bait on this one!
- Keep your friends close and your anemones closer.
- A fish walks into a bar. It took him 395 million years.
- You can’t fit inside a small metal box…but a tuna can!
- Surfing the net is great, unless, of course, you’re a fish.
- I watched a movie about fishing. It had a great cast in it.
- I’ve never had Fish Fingers. I didn’t know fish had hands.
- When your fish boss is watching, you better look e-fish-ent.
- You never take responsibility…it’s always salmon else’s fault.
- If you keep joking like that, you’ll make a bass out of yourself!
- My friend thinks he’s a fish but he’s wrong. He’s living in the Nile.
- That fish is rich and famous, but she’s still Jenny from the had-dock.
- Last night, I made fish tacos. They looked at them and just swam away.
- I used to look for shellfish at my local beach every day until I pulled a mussel.
- When another fish tries to make you think you’re crazy, tell them to stop bass-lighting you.
- A tuna sandwich walks into a bar, and the barman says…“Sorry, we don’t serve food here!”
- Someone threw a bottle of omega-3 pills at me. Luckily, I only sustained super fish oil injuries.
- I kept asking the aquarium owner about the walking fish. He said, “You axolotl questions!”
- My therapist told me to put a fish tank in my living room to ease stress and anxiety. He said it would help because of their indoor fins.
- Give a man a fish and he will have a meal. Teach a man how to fish and he will spend thousands of dollars on fishing equipment.

Section 5 of 10:

Fish Dad Jokes

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Make a splash with these hilarious dad jokes. If there’s an opportunity to incorporate fish-related humor into your daily conversation, take it! Throw out any of these dad jokes for a sea of laughter: ^{[5]
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- How do you talk to a fish? Drop it a line.
- Who is the fish’s valentine? His gil-friend!
- What do you call a fake koi fish? A de koi.
- What kind of fish go to heaven? Angelfish.
- What do you call a prehistoric fish? Prefish.
- How do fish like their burgers? Whale done.
- What car does a jellyfish drive? An invertible.
- What fish sounds the most like a harp? A carp.
- What do you call a fish on a plane? Flying fish!
- What do you call a fish with 10 eyes? Fiiiiiiiiiish.
- What do fish use to help them hear? A herring aid.
- Where does a fish keep his money? At a riverbank.
- What did the salmon say at closing time? Lox it up!
- What did the pirate fish make the prisoner fish do? Walk the plankton.
- What do sharks order at McDonald’s? A quarter-flounder with cheese.
- How much money does the richest fish in the sea have? A gill-ion dollars.
- Which Whitney Houston song is a fish’s favorite? “I Whale Always Love You.”

Section 6 of 10:

Fish Jokes for Kids

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Share a shell-arious joke to make kids smile. Telling jokes is a great way to bond with children, promote their creative thinking skills, and diffuse sour moods. ^{[6]
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- Where do fish sleep? On the sea bed.
- What kind of fish eats mice? A catfish.
- What’s the most jealous fish? Jelly-fish.
- Where do fish go on vacation? Finland!
- What’s a pirate’s favorite fish? A swordfish.
- What’s a fish’s favorite game? Salmon says!
- What do you call a fancy fish? So-fish-ticated!
- How do shellfish take photos? With a clam-era.
- Who grants fishes’ wishes? A fairy cod mother!
- Where do you find a fish in orbit? Trouter space!
- What kind of fish gets the most fan mail? Starfish!
- What do fish sing during winter? Christmas corals!
- How do fish get to school? They take the octo-bus.
- Why are fish so smart? Because they swim in schools.
- How do shellfish get to the hospital? In a clam-bulance.
- What did the fish say to their crush? “There’s some-fin special about you!”
- What is Taylor Fish’s favorite song she’s ever written? “You Need to Clam Down.”

Section 7 of 10:

Fish Jokes for Adults

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Drop a so-fish-ticated joke to humor adults. There are lots of fish-related words and puns that can be turned into a cheeky joke for adults. Here are some clever and unexpected options for a flipping good time: ^{[7]
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- Who do fish pray to? Cod Almighty.
- What do you call a religious fish poem? A Psalmon.
- Where do fish go for a facelift? The plastic sturgeon.
- What do you use to catfish on the internet? Clickbait.
- Why did one fish slap the other? To snapper out of it.
- What’s another name for a fish murderer? A serial kriller.
- What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fishually impaired.
- What kind of instrument helps you catch fish? Castanets.
- How do religious fish start off their prayers? “Dear Cod…”
- Did you hear about the fight in the kitchen? A fish got battered!
- What’s the head of the underwater mafia called? The Codfather.
- What happens when you put Nutella on salmon? You get salmonella.
- Did you hear about the goldfish who went bankrupt? Now he’s a bronze fish.
- Who’s the wealthiest fish in the sea? Gill Gates, the flounder of Mackerelsoft.
- What did the pet fish say when the cook served a fish steak for dinner? “Oh my cod!”
- There were 2 goldfish in a tank. What did one say to the other? “How do you drive this thing?”

Section 8 of 10:

Clown Fish Jokes

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Channel your inner Marlin for a Finding Nemo approved clownfish joke. As one of the most iconic and recognizable fish species, the clownfish is the perfect punchline for your next marine joke. Just keep swimming down our list for different options that would make Dory proud: ^{[8]
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- What’s a clown fish’s favorite artist? Eminemone.
- What kind of fish belongs in a circus? A clown fish!
- What do clownfish take to stay healthy? Vitamin sea!
- Where do clownfish go to borrow money? A loan-shark.
- What social media platform do clownfish use? Fishbook.
- Who did the clownfish call to repair his lights? An electric eel.
- What kind of music do clownfish love to rave to? Drum and bass.
- How did the clownfish buy an engagement ring? It prawned everything.
- What did the shark say after eating a clown fish? This tastes a little funny!
- Why did the scuba divers start laughing underwater? They saw a clown fish.
- Why was the clownfish late to school? Because he was fin-ishing his homework!
- Why should you never mess with a clown fish? You don’t want to make anemone!

Section 9 of 10:

Tuna Fish Jokes

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Crack everyone up with these top quality tuna jokes. If you want to get a tuna laughs, try making a joke about the “chicken of the sea.” Here are some ab-sole-lutely iconic tuna jokes to tell your friends and family: ^{[9]
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- What do you call a backwards tuna? A nut!
- What do tuna fish call submarines? A can of people!
- How do you tuna fish? You raise or lower the scales!
- Why was the tuna sad about her job? She got canned!
- Why was the tuna embarrassed? Because the seaweed!
- Why are tuna easy to weigh? They have their own scales.
- What’s better than a tuna sandwich? A three-na sandwich!
- Why was the fish at the carnival? She was a for-tuna teller!
- What did the tuna say when she hit a concrete wall? “Dam!”
- What’s got scales and a good sense of pitch? A piano tuner.
- Did you hear about the evil tuna? He was rotten to his albacore!
- What do Timon and Pumbaa order in restaurants? Tuna piccata!
- Why was the tuna sushi student so proud? He was an honored roll!
- Why did the fish sound so strange when it sang? It was autotuna-ed!
- What TV show starring Charlie Sheen do all fish love? Tuna-half Men.
- Why are tuna so clever? Because they spend so much time in schools!
- What did the tuna say when he was cleared of a crime? “I’m off the hook!”
- Why do the French never eat tuna sandwiches? Because bread is pain and fish is poisson!
- What’s the difference between a piano and a fish? You can tune a piano, but you can’t tuna fish!
- Why did Tom’s romantic evening go so badly? He ate some tuna because the can said “Best before date!”

Section 10 of 10:

Fish Knock-Knock Jokes

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Throw out a creative knock-knock joke for a whole load of fin. Some knock-knock jokes have a reputation for being corny and cliché, but the following lines are the perfect blend of cheesy and charming. Here are some fin-tastic knock-knock jokes to reel everyone in: ^{[10]
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- Knock-Knock. Who’s there? Fish. Fish who? Bless you!
- Knock-Knock. Who’s there? Gill. Gill who? Gill me a break and let me in!
- Knock-Knock. Who’s there? Trout. Trout who? Trout time you opened the door!
- Knock-Knock. Who’s there? Artie Fish. Artie Fish who? Artie Fish-al Intelligence!
- Knock-Knock. Who’s there? Nemo. Nemo who? Nemo time for jokes, just let me in!
- Knock-Knock. Who’s there? Cod. Cod who? Cod someone open the door already?!
- Knock-Knock. Who’s there? Halibut. Halibut who? Halibut time you answered the door!
- Knock-Knock. Who’s there? Fish. Fish who? Fish-ious temper you have there, you need to calm down!
- Knock-Knock. Who’s there? Fish. Fish who? Fish you a Merry Christmas, we fish you a Merry Christmas!
- Knock-Knock. Who’s there? Flounder. Flounder who? Flounder you at last…I’ve been looking everywhere!

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To come up with your own joke , experiment with fish-related terminology. You could replace a word in a common phrase with “cod,” “bass,” “trout,” “tuna,” “bait,” “gill,” “fin,” or “sea,” or use these terms as puns and play on their double meanings.

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180+ Fish Jokes, Puns & One-Liners for All Ages

Top-Tier Fish Jokes

Steps

Hilarious Fish Jokes

Fishing Jokes

Fish Puns

Fish One-Liners

Fish Dad Jokes

Fish Jokes for Kids

Fish Jokes for Adults

Clown Fish Jokes

Tuna Fish Jokes

Fish Knock-Knock Jokes

Expert Q&A

Video

Tips

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