Q&A for How to Handle a Dramatic Sister in Law

Start by writing down exactly how you're feeling. In the middle of drama, our emotions can get heightened or suppressed and not be an accurate representation of how we really feel. It can also help to give yourself 10-15 minutes of self-soothing time to create a sense of calmness or tranquility within yourself. After this, you can decide if the drama is worth addressing or if you should just continue on and live your life.

Do not respond or talk to that person, it is not worth it, ignore them.

Every time she asks, just tell her that they/you are doing well until she gets tired of hearing the same answer, believe me it works!

Feel confident in the knowledge you somehow make her feel threatened, and know that her feeling that way has nothing to do with you and everything to do with her own insecurities. Keep being the goofball you.

What? No. That is absolutely none of her business or concern.

Is this your spouse's family event? If it is, I think that it should be up to him to speak to his family, lay the guidelines out for your attendance and let them know how much he loves you, and that if he has to choose sides he will. He needs to question how they feel about him, if they are making trouble for his spouse.

Don't waste your time anymore. Tell her if she wants to talk to you, she can call or message you and you will respond if you can.

You're not wrong. If they can't support you in both, they shouldn't be in either of the weddings.

If you move, she will still most likely be at your home to visit her brother. If you decide to move, it should be because you want to and not because you're trying to avoid her. Try to discuss the issue with your husband and come up with some possible solutions. If you are comfortable in your marriage you don't need to allow your husband's family to scare you off.

Talk to your husband about it. Let him talk to his sister about how she needs to watch her own kids.

Tell her that you married her brother because you love him intensely and would do so whatever his financial status in the world. Tell her about how you've always worked hard in your life and are perfectly capable of doing so again in the future but that right now you are enjoying getting to know your husband better before starting a new work adventure some time in the future. Ask her what she expects of both her brother and you -- the answer might be very telling. At the end though, ignore her. She is jealous of what isn't rightly hers -- the fortune her brother's hard work amassed and it's up to him to make that aspect clear to her, not you.

You already have the desire to be this way, so that's half the battle won. Realize that if she provokes you, ignores you or does anything else to be a challenge around you, that you're likely to feel frustrated, so you must learn to not react but to see things from her perspective and accept that she acts poorly for reasons that you can't change. Be a model of kindness but don't try too hard too long -- do it in short, sweet bursts, then clear out to recover!

Never go to lunch or shopping with her. She will take advantage of your good will or will expect that you buy everything for her.

If it's your husband's sister, you should let him handle this. Have him explain to her that as a couple, you need more one-on-one time with each other, and having a nightly visitor is more than you can handle. Schedule a weekly or bi-weekly dinner so she doesn't feel unwanted or left out.

If she refuses to acknowledge the fact that her son is the source of the rift in your family, there is really nothing you can do. Once she realizes that you made the move that was best for your family, she will come around to you again.

Your husband and his sister seem to be stuck in a family tradition of getting dad to patch it all up when one of them misbehaves. The answer lies in recognizing that you can't change that silly stuck-in-the-past reaction they play out but you can certainly make it clear what you won't tolerate. Tell your S-I-L that she can speak politely to you or not at all but that you will not tolerate being spoken to rudely or meanly and that you expect an apology. Repeat this without explaining in any greater depth, keep it as a simple exercise in expecting polite speech toward you. Anything deeper needs to be resolved from your husband's end.

Your family probably knows what she is like and takes what she says with a grain of salt. You could speak to her about how her gossip hurts you, or you and your family could just stop saying much around her.

Talk to your boyfriend and tell him how you feel, and create boundaries together that you both can enforce when she is around.

Tell her you are unwell or busy. Keep saying this until she gets the message.

You can't change people. You can try to adjust but the situation will not change until she finds her own place.

Maybe you're being a bit unfair; the woman probably can't help the way she laughs. Try to be kind to her. If you need to, step outside for a few minutes.

Call her aside and tell her that is disrespectful and and she must stop now and permanently, or you will have to go to other members of the family and let them mediate.

Defend your husband and tell your SIL to stop being so critical of him. Don't be too harsh though or you risk causing a big fight. If you feel like this is a consistent issue, then find the time to talk to her privately and tell her that you don't appreciate how often she criticizes and makes rude comments about your husband.

You should ask her why she is being confrontational, or try to avoid confrontational subjects with her at all times.

This description sounds like a sister-in-law that uses anger and manipulation to get what she wants. When brothers marry, some core family members can have a difficult time understanding and accepting that the family dynamics have changed. You and your husband need to set and enforce personal boundaries with consistency that will send a message that there is a line that cannot be crossed to prevent power struggles. When she tries to engage with you aggressively, ignore her and walk away.

Just say, “There is no competition here. Kids develop at different rates.” Then leave it at that. Be diplomatic and neutral.

Keep a routine for yourself and your family, and don't over commit to her timetable. Choose a few things to be a part of. Have your conversation planned out ahead of time so when she asks why you can't be following her timetable, you have your reasons prepared, i.e., the kids have homework, you have to run errands, you're meeting a friend, etc.

You can, but are you sure you want to? Before you make any rash decisions, you should talk to your sister-in-law and ask her to avoid saying these things about your fiance in the future, or avoid talking about him at all if necessary. If she is unable to do so, then you might have to cut her off.

Ask them to remove it. If they refuse, you can flag the picture to alert Facebook that there is a picture of you on someone's page that you did not approve.

Follow the methods in Deal With Rude People .