We all have been there --those awkward years when nothing seems to go your way. You feel angry and confused with your changing body--convinced that you are the only one going through this and hating the world because no one on earth could possibly relate to how you feel. Well believe it or not, there are hundreds upon thousands of teens experiencing the same thoughts and feelings all over the world. Here are a few tips on how to deal with the thoughts roaming through your head.
Steps
Method 1
Method 1 of 2:
Get to Know Yourself
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Give yourself some space. You are the most important person in your life. Above all, you need to be happy. Take some time to yourself to decide where your moodiness stems from and make a list of things that you want changed.
- Are you unhappy with your friends?
- Are you annoyed by your family?
- Do you dislike yourself?
- Are the hormones just hitting you hard?
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Analyze the problem. Now that you have identified the source of your unhappiness, you can start making the necessary changes to improve the situation. Start brainstorming ideas on how you can fix your problems so that they become smaller, if not completely gone. While you are brainstorming, just keep in mind that:
- Not all of the problems you will face in life are an easy fix.
- You can't always fix all of your problems--some of things are just out of your control.
- Sometimes, the improvement of your problems may depend on the participation of others--don't let this discourage you.
- Don't be afraid to ask other's for help if you are struggling to fix an issue.
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Write out all possible solutions on paper and rank them. Take a step back and observe the situation in front of you--as if you are looking through an open window. If you want your situation to change, you have to take the first steps.
- When looking for a solution, search inward at your role and what you personally can do to change the situation--but remember, you can only change your role in the situation.
- Keep a calm mind. Try to refrain from thinking emotionally. When coming up with solutions, it is best to have logic on your side.
- Learn as much about your situation as you can.The more you know about the situation you're in, the better able you will be to come up with possible solutions. Also, knowing what your facing relieves some of the anxiety from the uncertainty.
- Take note of any and all resources you have available to you--these could be money, time, family, friends, or personal traits.
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Let go of what you can’t change. Remember, not everything is in your control. When you start to feel overwhelmed by more issues than seems humanly possible, it's time to start letting go of things that you can't change. We often find ourselves clinging to situations from the past, willing the clock to rewind. Focusing all your energy on this will take away from the problems that we can fix. Don't dwell in the past--instead focus on the here and now.
- Let go of the past. Let go of your mistakes. Focus on resolving your current problems and work on making the rest of your life and actions as good as they can be.
- The problems from the past will often seem smaller if you focus on bettering yourself for a brighter future...even if that means coming to terms with the fact that your mistakes don't define you.
- Stop focusing on your faults. Everybody has them--- and chances are, you've been unable to see that because you've been so focused on finding your own.
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Asking for help. Not all the problems you face in life can be solved alone. You should never feel like you're facing you're problems all on your own.
- Remember that you have a support system--you are surrounded by people that care about you and will want to help you.
- Asking for help doesn't mean that you are weak. Dealing with several problems all at once or even one large problem, will leave you feeling drained.
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Method 2
Method 2 of 2:
Finding an Outlet
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Pick a hobby. Everyone has something in their life that interests them, whether it be sports, reading, music, video games, writing, or some form of art. Finding that interest is a key tool in dealing with your emotions. If you are uncertain of what interests you, start exploring!
- Start searching online for different hobbies or topics of interest--you can start by selecting a base or broad topic like the outdoors. Once you have selected that, you can examine all the hobbies related to that topic.
- Place yourself in new situations. You'll meet plenty of new people and possibly discover a potential interest.
- Join some clubs--schools and community centers offer countless organizations with a broad variety of interests.
- Ask your friends. Most people become friends based on a common interest--ask your friends what they like to do for fun. You can even ask if you can tag along the next time they perform their hobby.
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Use it to your advantage. Whenever you start to feel upset with life or a problem your facing, use your hobby or interest to your advantage.
- Your hobby is a creative outlet for your emotions. Use it to make peace with your feelings. Whatever you are feeling, it's legitimate -- otherwise you wouldn't be feeling them.
- Keeping yourself busy will leave little time to dwell on your problems.
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Give yourself some time. Much like emotions, problems don't go away overnight. Slowly but surely, though, they'll fade.
- Keep a journal. Writing your feelings will help you come to terms with them and hopefully bring some closure. Keeping your emotions bottled up is not healthy and will lead to frustration and stress.
- Try thought switching. When you start to think about what is upsetting you, stop! Divert your thoughts to anything else -- what was that funny thing Sasha said in class? Who's that cute new student in third period? Will they start serving cookies with lunch? Is global warming real and if so will it destroy the world as I know it?
- Count your blessings. I know that you are probably fed up with this by now but I swear it works. There are people in the world who have it much worse than you do, chances are you may even know some of them. Focus on the positives in your life--you have food to eat whenever you are hungry. You have a roof over your head. Clothes and shoes are not something you have to worry about. You have indoor plumbing which a good portion of the worlds doesn't have. Often, there are much bigger issues at hand.
- Above all, Remember that You are your own worst enemy. Only you have the power to let problems impact your emotions.
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Tips
- Don't distress. Everyone -- everyone -- is in this position at one time or another.Thanks
- Never forget that you aren't alone in this and that people will help you if you ask.Thanks
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