Q&A for How to Be Less Emotional in a Relationship

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How do you deal with an emotional partner?

Lauren Urban, LCSW
Relationship Counselor
Lauren Urban is a licensed psychotherapist in Brooklyn, New York, with over 13 years of therapy experience working with children, families, couples, and individuals. She received her Masters in Social Work from Hunter College in 2006, and specializes in working with the LGBTQIA community and with clients in recovery or considering recovery for drug and alcohol use.

Lauren Urban, LCSW

Relationship Counselor

Expert Answer

It's best to just be open with them and communicate the issue if this has been a reoccurring issue. Relationships thrive on trust and mutual respect, and if you aren't honest about a problem you're having with your partner's behavior, the issue may become worse over time.

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Question

What triggers negative emotions?

Lauren Urban, LCSW
Relationship Counselor
Lauren Urban is a licensed psychotherapist in Brooklyn, New York, with over 13 years of therapy experience working with children, families, couples, and individuals. She received her Masters in Social Work from Hunter College in 2006, and specializes in working with the LGBTQIA community and with clients in recovery or considering recovery for drug and alcohol use.

Lauren Urban, LCSW

Relationship Counselor

Expert Answer

It varies from person-to-person. For instance, you might get upset looking at your ex's social media profile. You could also get angry or overwhelmed when you feel like you have too much on your plate. Track your emotions to figure out what triggers you so you can avoid these things.

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I am in a relationship with a guy who was dating my friend, but all of a sudden we fell for each other and started dating. He said he's no longer dating her, but they still call and text. What do I do?

Paul Chernyak, LPC
Licensed Professional Counselor
Paul Chernyak is a Licensed Professional Counselor in Chicago. He graduated from the American School of Professional Psychology in 2011.

Paul Chernyak, LPC

Licensed Professional Counselor

Expert Answer

Confront your partner and tell him how it makes you feel from YOUR perspective. Avoid blaming him or being defensive. Just state the facts and try to come to a compromise with him about how to handle the situation.

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I've had issues with drinking, and she's given me chances, but now apparently she doesn't trust me, even though I haven't cheated on her or anything. How can I fix something that I messed up?

Paul Chernyak, LPC
Licensed Professional Counselor
Paul Chernyak is a Licensed Professional Counselor in Chicago. He graduated from the American School of Professional Psychology in 2011.

Paul Chernyak, LPC

Licensed Professional Counselor

Expert Answer

You can only gain trust through your actions instead of words. It takes time to rebuild trust. For example: If you stopped drinking, then make sure you don't drink when around her to show you are serious about it. Tell her and show her the actions you have taken to rebuild trust.

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