Q&A for How to Be a Good Parent

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What qualities make a good parent?

Deanna Dawson-Jesus, CD (DONA)
Birth & Postpartum Doula, Childbirth, & Lactation Educator
Deanna Dawson-Jesus is a Birth Doula, Childbirth, and Lactation Educator based in Danville, California. As the owner of Birthing Babies - A Celebration of Life, Deanna has 19 years of birth doula experience and has assisted with over 250 births. She also has over five years of postpartum doula experience and assists more than ten families. Deanna has additional extensive training in Assisted Reproductive Technologies, VBAC support, and Perinatal Loss Support. She is a Certified Birth Doula by DONA International and teaches at Blossom Birth and Family.

Deanna Dawson-Jesus, CD (DONA)

Birth & Postpartum Doula, Childbirth, & Lactation Educator

Expert Answer

There are tons of opinions on what it means to be a good parent, but the most important thing is that you do your own research so you can feel confident in the decisions you make. Every child is different and will need different types of care and discipline. If you're totally overwhelmed, consider taking a parenting class at a local adult education center. This will give you a good start in the right direction.

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Question

How do you prepare to be a dad?

Deanna Dawson-Jesus, CD (DONA)
Birth & Postpartum Doula, Childbirth, & Lactation Educator
Deanna Dawson-Jesus is a Birth Doula, Childbirth, and Lactation Educator based in Danville, California. As the owner of Birthing Babies - A Celebration of Life, Deanna has 19 years of birth doula experience and has assisted with over 250 births. She also has over five years of postpartum doula experience and assists more than ten families. Deanna has additional extensive training in Assisted Reproductive Technologies, VBAC support, and Perinatal Loss Support. She is a Certified Birth Doula by DONA International and teaches at Blossom Birth and Family.

Deanna Dawson-Jesus, CD (DONA)

Birth & Postpartum Doula, Childbirth, & Lactation Educator

Expert Answer

I would encourage you to go to childbirth, child care, and breastfeeding classes with your partner. The more you understand about being a new parent, the better you'll be able to support your partner.

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Question

How do I have more confidence in my parenting?

Deanna Dawson-Jesus, CD (DONA)
Birth & Postpartum Doula, Childbirth, & Lactation Educator
Deanna Dawson-Jesus is a Birth Doula, Childbirth, and Lactation Educator based in Danville, California. As the owner of Birthing Babies - A Celebration of Life, Deanna has 19 years of birth doula experience and has assisted with over 250 births. She also has over five years of postpartum doula experience and assists more than ten families. Deanna has additional extensive training in Assisted Reproductive Technologies, VBAC support, and Perinatal Loss Support. She is a Certified Birth Doula by DONA International and teaches at Blossom Birth and Family.

Deanna Dawson-Jesus, CD (DONA)

Birth & Postpartum Doula, Childbirth, & Lactation Educator

Expert Answer

Take a parenting class! Attending a class will help you recognize what you're doing right and will give you help in areas you feel less confident.

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Question

How do you explain manners to a child?

Wits End Parenting
Parenting Specialists
Wits End Parenting is a parent-coaching practice based in Berkeley, California specializing in strong-willed, “spirited” children with impulsivity, emotional volatility, difficulty “listening,” defiance, and aggression. Wits End Parenting's counselors incorporate positive discipline that is tailored to each child’s temperament while also providing long-term results, freeing parents from the need to continually re-invent their discipline strategies.

Wits End Parenting

Parenting Specialists

Expert Answer

Model manners for your child by using them yourself! Your child's best teacher is you.

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Question

How should I reward my child?

Wits End Parenting
Parenting Specialists
Wits End Parenting is a parent-coaching practice based in Berkeley, California specializing in strong-willed, “spirited” children with impulsivity, emotional volatility, difficulty “listening,” defiance, and aggression. Wits End Parenting's counselors incorporate positive discipline that is tailored to each child’s temperament while also providing long-term results, freeing parents from the need to continually re-invent their discipline strategies.

Wits End Parenting

Parenting Specialists

Expert Answer

First, determine if your child is motivated by rewards. If they are, use things like connection as a reward, not just things or food. For instance, a young child would consider 5 extra minutes of snuggle time as a reward, while an older child might enjoy 10 minutes of basketball with you. Just don't rely on it too much—it can backfire and be harder to motivate your child in the long run.

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Question

How can I teach my child good manners?

Wits End Parenting
Parenting Specialists
Wits End Parenting is a parent-coaching practice based in Berkeley, California specializing in strong-willed, “spirited” children with impulsivity, emotional volatility, difficulty “listening,” defiance, and aggression. Wits End Parenting's counselors incorporate positive discipline that is tailored to each child’s temperament while also providing long-term results, freeing parents from the need to continually re-invent their discipline strategies.

Wits End Parenting

Parenting Specialists

Expert Answer

One of the best ways to teach good manners is to model them. Speak respectfully to your children, and when you want them to do something, ask them politely. Have dinner together regularly and teach them good table manners. Also, require them to use good manners—if they don't ask you politely for something, don't give it to them.

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