Q&A for How to Change Yourself Completely

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  • Question
    What do I do when finding a life coach?
    Lucy Yeh
    Career & Life Coach
    Lucy Yeh is a Human Resources Director, Recruiter, and Certified Life Coach (CLC) with over 20 years of experience. With a training background with Coaching for Life and Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) at InsightLA, Lucy has worked with professionals of all levels to improve the quality of their careers, personal/professional relationships, self marketing, and life balance.
    Career & Life Coach
    Expert Answer
    Listen to your inner voice for guidance, as it's common for goals and values to shift as we move through life. If you are facing a significant change, the process can feel easier with help from an accountability partner and coach, and this person should listen to the goals that you are setting. Their job is to hold you accountable and help you navigate this time in your life!
  • Question
    How can I be more mature and responsible?
    Community Answer
    For responsibility, keep yourself on track. If you forget things easily, you could write down the things you need to do for that day, take a picture, and make it the wallpaper on your phone. Keep yourself on task and make sure you get everything done. For maturity, always think before you speak or act. Be a bigger person, walk away from conflict, be kind and polite to everyone.
  • Question
    How do I change everything about myself?
    WikiHowUser20171109012036
    Community Answer
    Ask yourself what you want to change. Don't just say, "my appearance" or "my personality". What about your appearance? Is it your facial features? Maybe you have braces, glasses, and/or acne. Maybe you feel like you have a short temper. Write everything down or type it up in detail. Then, found solutions to your problems. Search online for ways to make your facial features larger, smaller, softer, and/or harder. There are braces that can go on the inside of your teeth. Research those. Research eye surgeries or considering getting contacts. Learn ways to lessen acne. Find anger management classes. If you really want to change yourself, research. Find ways to change what you want.
  • Question
    Why are people jealous of my success?
    Community Answer
    Because you have something desirable that they don't have. That's the normal situation to feel jealousy in. However, no one should be mean to you or try to bring you down because they're jealous. You can help minimize such behavior by being humble and offering to help those who are worse off than you. You definitely don't need to bring yourself down in the process, though.
  • Question
    How do I stop being a negative person?
    Community Answer
    Focus on the positive in your life. Make a list of the things you have going for you and the things you're thankful for (if you need help with this, ask someone to assist you in brainstorming). Compliment someone else, and actually mean it.
  • Question
    What happens if my friends don't like what I change to? I want to change a little bit but my friends like to judge so what if they don't like it?
    Community Answer
    If you think you are changing to be a better person than you were before, and you find your friends not accepting it, take some time to evaluate your priorities and your friends' priorities. Evaluate how this change will affect the people around you. Is it going to change you for the better and make you a more fulfilled person? If so, go right ahead. True friends will understand the rationale behind your transformation. If they don't understand, then move on from these "friends" who ridicule your positive transformation. Do not succumb to judging. Those friends are not real.
  • Question
    What if I want to change myself because I hate who I am and I'm doing it for someone else?
    Community Answer
    Change yourself for you. Not anyone else. If they don't accept you, they aren't worth your time. Deal with why you hate yourself before trying to fit someone else's ideal. If you don't, you'll never be happy and you'll be easily manipulated.
  • Question
    I am suffering from several health problems, and thinking of the future distracts me. What can I do?
    Community Answer
    Don't worry about the future or the past, just focus on the present. Be thankful for the opportunities, people, and possessions you currently have in your life. Try mindfulness meditation, this will help you to be more aware of the now.
  • Question
    My fiance is always yelling at me and telling me I am simple because I cry easy. What can I do?
    Community Answer
    Just leave this person. Why would you want to be with someone who treats you this way? A healthy relationship is pleasant and makes you feel good about yourself. Your fiance should not be yelling at you or insulting you. It's better to get out now than end up stuck married to a person who doesn't respect you.
  • Question
    My family and friends always call me "kid"! What can I do?
    WikiHowUser20171109012036
    Community Answer
    Talk to them. If you're the youngest in your family, they will always see you as the "baby". The same can be said for a close group of friends. Another reason they call you "kid" could be because you act like one, or their impression of one. Try acting more mature and take on more responsibilities to prove yourself as a teenager or an adult.
  • Question
    How can I stop telling white lies to my spouse?
    Community Answer
    As soon as you catch yourself telling a white lie, instantly come back with the truth. Repeating this again and again will help you to break the bad habit.
  • Question
    How can I be more confident?
    Community Answer
    Try spending a little bit more time on yourself when you are getting ready in the morning. Also, try to encourage or compliment yourself at least once a day; it can be simple as "Yes! I finally got around to cleaning my room," or "Hey, I actually do look nice in white."
  • Question
    I'm a very shy and obstinate girl. I don't know how to talk to people. I lack self confidence and I'm bullied by my friends. What should I do?
    Community Answer
    That's horrible! I suggest you talk to your loved ones about what's going on. You could also try telling your friends that they are hurting your feelings and asking them to stop. If the behavior continues, you should find a new group of friends. If all else fails, talk to the guidance counselor or principal at school about the situation.
  • Question
    My boyfriend thinks I am sometimes self-centered. What should I do to show him I'm not?
    Community Answer
    Change his perception by changing your behavior. Volunteer at a shelter or soup kitchen, or just help out more at work or school. He will see by your actions that you are not self-centered.
  • Question
    How can I learn to be nice in front of my teachers and avoid swearing?
    Community Answer
    Be especially careful with what you're saying. Be aware that it's a teacher you're speaking to and think of the consequences of swearing in front of a teacher. Keep eye contact, and if the teacher says you've done something wrong, don't argue or talk back. Apologize instead and make amends.
  • Question
    I want to dye my hair. What if I don't like how it looks after I dye it?
    Community Answer
    You can always dye it another color!
  • Question
    How can I lose weight without exercising?
    Community Answer
    Have a good diet plan, drink lots of water and fat-burning tea. As long as you are taking in fewer calories than you expend during the day, you'll lose weight.
  • Question
    How can I stop drinking beer?
    II BoomSmash II
    Community Answer
    Going to a group or seeking medical help is the best. Get a few friends and help each other out.
  • Question
    How can I change my body shape?
    Community Answer
    You can do a lot of exercises to grow and emphasize certain parts of your body. Weight loss can also do a lot to change your body shape (though it's impossible to target weight loss to one area of the body).
  • Question
    How can I become more laid back and chill?
    II BoomSmash II
    Community Answer
    Remember that you only live once. Take a break once in a while. You need to take the time to reset, even if you're just kicking back with a good book or listening to your favorite music. Don't overthink things and don't get upset over small slights.
  • Question
    I want to get inspiration from my role model, but how do I approach them when my teeth look terrible and I'm embarrassed by that?
    Community Answer
    Teeth are important part of your overall health. If finance is your reason for the neglect teeth, then there are dental collages that will fix your teeth for free, the work is overseen by a teaching doctor. Be sure to brush them regularly and floss too. At the end of the day though, you need to weigh up being held back by your teeth or moving forward in a direction that can allow you to bloom and find more ways to care for yourself.
  • Question
    How do I change myself completely without people thinking I'm weird?
    Community Answer
    Start small: maybe get a new haircut, or try taking small risks like raising your hand more in class. Even if people do think you're weird for changing yourself, you should ignore them and do whatever makes you happy.
  • Question
    People keep telling me that I am annoying or I start too much drama. How can I change myself so people will stop hating on me?
    Community Answer
    Whenever people complain about you, ask them to tell more details about the problem and what exactly they find annoying. Ask at least one friend to warn you on the spot right when you start doing something that people see as annoying or starting drama - they could say it explicitly or you can agree on a sign. This way, you can recognize patterns and it will be easier to change and stop doing these things completely.
  • Question
    One of my parent is too negative and always unknowingly puts me down. I've tried talking to them about this issue, but it hasn't helped. What do I do?
    Community Answer
    If you've already spoken to them about this issue and nothing's changed for the better, then maybe ask one of their close loved ones to have a word with them. The next best thing is to try not to let their opinions affect you negatively, they clearly have their own issues. Find people who fill you with optimism and good feelings and aim to nurture such traits within yourself, too.
  • Question
    My boyfriend hates many aspects of his life and he is always talking about change. How can I help him improve his life?
    Community Answer
    Most people talk of change but don't initiate, help him visualize, plan, and then act on his transformation. Engage him and understand why he wants to change, be supportive, and stay positive.
  • Question
    How do I break bad habits?
    Community Answer
    Self-discipline. Punish yourself every time you indulge in the habit, by, for instance, taking away something you enjoy for a period of time. Also, reward yourself every day that you don't perform the bad habit.
  • Question
    How can I control my anger when my teacher puts me down in class?
    Community Answer
    If your teacher is singling you out and saying inappropriate things to you, talk to your parents, the principal, or a guidance counselor about what's going on. Otherwise, try the "5 years rule," if it won't bother you in 5 years, just forget about it, it's not important.
  • Question
    What should I do if I'm only an introvert in certain places?
    WikiHowUser20171109012036
    Community Answer
    You may be a social introvert. Around people you don't know, you're really shy, but if you're with a close group of friends, you're really outgoing. That's natural for a lot of people. If you want to get over this, remember the phrase, "Fake it till you make it." Fake the confidence and outgoing nature until it becomes your default pattern of behavior.
  • Question
    How can I be nice to everyone and control my anger?
    Community Answer
    Just keep a smile on your face and don't be rude, even if you're angry. If you get upset, walk away from the situation, or try to calmly address the problem and work it out.
  • Question
    How can I change myself without feeling someone is pressuring me?
    Community Answer
    Pressure can help you achieve the goals you need to accomplish in order to change yourself. Embracing the pressure set by others may motivate you to stick to your goals. Being accountable to others is an excellent way to keep you dedicated to making real, significant change.
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