Q&A for How to Cover up a Fart in High School Settings

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  • Question
    What do I do if other people are in the bathroom?
    Community Answer
    My advice is that you fart while you flush the toilet. They won't hear it because of how loud the flush is.
  • Question
    Why does chewing gum cause farts?
    Community Answer
    It causes farts because it entices you to swallow air. The same is true of smoking.
  • Question
    Can holding in a fart too long kill me?
    Community Answer
    No. But it could make you really uncomfortable.
  • Question
    What can I do when I'm reading next to a teacher and I need to fart badly?
    Community Answer
    You should ask if you can go to the bathroom. Just pretend you have to pee badly.
  • Question
    How do I hold in a fart?
    Community Answer
    Squeeze your rectal muscles tightly to keep it in, but the fart will come out at some point. Best practice is to ask to be excused and let it go in private.
  • Question
    Why do farts smell bad?
    Community Answer
    They contain gas like hydrogen sulfide and mercaptans. These compounds are produced in intestines when food with sulfur in it is broken down, such as meat, eggs, and some vegetables.
  • Question
    What if someone says that you farted?
    Community Answer
    You can just ignore the accusation or you can deflect it by blaming it on someone else.
  • Question
    What if I have to fart next to my crush?
    Community Answer
    Either give an excuse and make a run or say your stomach is growling or try to pass the blame to somebody else nearby.
  • Question
    What should I do if I'm in school with my crush and I let out a huge fart?
    Community Answer
    Blame it on someone else nearby, or own up to it and laugh it off.
  • Question
    If the classroom is silent, what do you do if you need to fart?
    TamF
    Community Answer
    Hold it back as much as you can. Even if doesn't make a sound, it can still stink and people can notice it's coming from you. If you feel you can't hold it back, ask to be excused to the restroom.
  • Question
    What should I drink so I don't fart as much?
    Community Answer
    Drink plain water with no straw. Don't gulp it down, and take small sips without taking in air. Also, avoid anything that's carbonated.
  • Question
    What if you really need to fart and your crush has caught you?
    Community Answer
    Make a joke of it. Everyone has gas - even your crush.
  • Question
    Why do farts grumble when they're held in?
    Community Answer
    Farting is your body releasing gas from your intestines. When you don't fart, that gas can get backed up into your intestines, which causes that rumbling sound.
  • Question
    What do I do if someone blames a fart on me?
    Tom De Backer
    Top Answerer
    He who smelt it, dealt it. If it wasn't you, push that blame right back to the blamer, or at least refuse to take it on board. Say "Hey! No, it wasn't me, I am not so rude that I would do that." Or "Hey, it was not me, I don't know who did it, but I will not accept you blaming me for it."
  • Question
    Why do people find farts so gross?
    Community Answer
    Most bodily emissions are considered gross. Farts smell bad, so people don't want to be subjected to them.
  • Question
    Why does farting make a sound?
    Community Answer
    The sound you hear is the sound of air being squeezed out of the anus. (Think of it like letting air out of a balloon a little at a time.)
  • Question
    Why is farting so embarrassing?
    Tom De Backer
    Top Answerer
    It is an unpleasant bodily function that is closely related, if only through its location, to our genital organs. All these things require us to be discrete about it. Nobody likes to draw people's attention to the anus. Also, we are all trying to make life as comfortable as possible for everyone around us, so when someone farts in a group, everybody suffers. You caused everyone to feel a little bad, and that is embarrassing. But in the end, it's just a fart; everyone does it, so don't worry too much.
  • Question
    Can I fart little by little so it can be a little silent?
    Tom De Backer
    Top Answerer
    That's one of the tried-and-true techniques to handle this situation. Just know that flatulence is not only stopped by your sphincter; that's only the last line. If you allow everything to go to that last line, the urge to release will be considerably stronger, so it takes a lot of practice to then let it go in small, quiet bursts. But yes, it does work.
  • Question
    Do farts contain sulfur?
    Community Answer
    A typical fart is composed of about 59 percent nitrogen, 21 percent hydrogen, 9 percent carbon dioxide, 7 percent methane and 4 percent oxygen. Only about one percent of a fart contains hydrogen sulfide gas and mercaptans, which contain sulfur, so yes, farts contain a small amount of sulfur.
  • Question
    What happens if I hold in my farts?
    Community Answer
    Nothing will happen if you hold in your farts.
  • Question
    When you let out a very long large fart, does it cause a bulge in your pants?
    Community Answer
    Not unless it exits with an awful lot of force.
  • Question
    What is the condition called if I can't fart?
    Tom De Backer
    Top Answerer
    This falls under the term "constipation". It means the natural exit of feces is blocked or difficult, and it includes solid excrement, liquid excrement as well as gaseous excrement.
  • Question
    Isn't blaming a fart on someone else a really rude move?
    Community Answer
    Yes, very. Sometimes it might even get you blamed back. If you do happen to pass gas, just say "pardon me" and take the blame.
  • Question
    Can I blame my fart on a nearby janitor or custodian?
    Community Answer
    You can try, but most people will be able to quickly determine that you're trying to cover up for yourself.
  • Question
    How do I make a fart be silent?
    Tom De Backer
    Top Answerer
    The sound is produced by the vibration of your sphincter muscles and the end of the colon. If you learn how to control those muscles so you can relax them when you flatulate, the channel is open more widely and the sound can be reduced or eliminated entirely. Look into Kegel exercises to learn how to control those muscles.
  • Question
    What if Im kissing my crush and I have to fart?
    Community Answer
    Do your best to hold it in. If you can't, excuse yourself and find a bathroom.
  • Question
    What if I'm doing show and tell and I fart?
    Community Answer
    Laugh along with everyone. You could say something to ease the tension like, "Lucky for you guys I'm nearer the teacher than you guys this time!".
  • Question
    If I farted in class today, and don’t want to come to school the next day, is that normal?
    Community Answer
    Yes, it's normal, you're just embarrassed. Go to school anyway. Either everyone will have already forgotten all about it, or you might get teased a little bit, and then everyone will have forgotten about it by the next day. If you get teased, just laugh along with everybody else, like, "Haha, I'm sorry, I just couldn't hold it in!" If you seem like you're in on the joke, people won't really make fun of you.
  • Question
    What should I do if I have already farted in public?
    Community Answer
    Don't mention it, people will most likely forget very quickly. If you keep quiet, they won't remember.
  • Question
    What if I am next to a teacher and he does not let me go to the loo? Should I fart? Because whenever I hold it in, it comes out.
    Community Answer
    Tell your teacher you need to go, and embarrass them by saying something along the lines of "if I don't go, I will have to do it right here in class". They should not be forcing you to stay in class if you need to use the bathroom.
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