Q&A for How to Tell Someone They Are Wrong

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  • Question
    How do you tell someone they are wrong in a nice way?
    Maya Diamond, MA
    Relationship Coach
    Maya Diamond is a Dating and Relationship Coach in Berkeley, CA. She has 15 years of experience helping singles stuck in frustrating dating patterns find internal security, heal their past, and create healthy, loving, and lasting partnerships. She received her Master's in Somatic Psychology from the California Institute of Integral Studies in 2009.
    Relationship Coach
    Expert Answer
    The first step is to get a grasp on your own emotions. Take a second to relax or do some deep breathing exercises if you're upset. Then, instead of getting right into what the other person did wrong, start with a little bit of vulnerability. Tell them about a time you were wrong, or explain how their mistake has impacted you. This will disarm them and keep them from feeling like their mistake is all about them.
  • Question
    What if I'm in a debate and I want to prove the other person wrong? How do I get the people on his team to agree with me and prove him wrong?
    KELSIE GRIFFITH
    Community Answer
    Have good combat skills, and learn as much about the topic and its meaning as possible.
  • Question
    I have had a friend for 6 years. One day she got a friend who is now so close with my friend that she forgets that I even exist. When I ignored my friend, she started ignoring me back. What can I do?
    Community Answer
    Just tell your friend you think there is a problem, she probably doesn't even know she is hurting you. Say something about it and maybe she can work on it.
  • Question
    My older brother thinks about our family so negatively and I try to make him think clearer but he just gets smart mouthy with me. What can I do?
    Community Answer
    You can't convince him to change his mind, but you should continue to listen to him and positively represent your family.
  • Question
    My grandpa always thinks he's right, though over half the time he's wrong. What do I do?
    Miranda
    Community Answer
    Grandpas are difficult. Just make sure you don't get in a wrong/right situation with your grandpa anymore, because if he is really stubborn he will never admit he is wrong.
  • Question
    My mum is wrong about something which is certainly not my business, but how do I tell her?
    Tom De Backer
    Top Answerer
    You either don't, or you do. I would not go into it, because it's none of your business. But if you feel you must, then state that clearly. "Hey mom, look, I know it's definitely none of my business, but I really do feel something's wrong, and I thought I'd ask you how you feel about [this], because the way I see it, it should be [that]? I don't want to stick my nose where it doesn't belong, so I'm conflicted. But you're my mom, so I trust I can talk to you about this."
  • Question
    My grandma murmurs occasionally to herself. I love her but it annoys me a lot. Even if I tell her to stop, she will just pretend as if she didn't do anything, what do I do?
    Community Answer
    I would try my best to ignore her, but in a nice way. If it gets to be too much, I would tell her politely. For example, you could say; "Grandma, you are talking to yourself." Then have a little laugh about it with her.
  • Question
    My friend thinks that he's good at tennis, but he's not. I definitely play better. How do I prove it to him?
    Community Answer
    What's the point of telling your friend that you're better than him at something? Honestly, if you are really his friend, tell him he's good. Fuel his ego. Unless he was deluding himself enough to try to enter into a match or competition and risk humiliating himself, it's not necessarily in his best interest to hear "the truth" about his tennis skills.
  • Question
    What if my sister-in-law treats one of my children better than the other?
    Community Answer
    Talk to her and help her understand that it could negatively impact them, and damage the children's relationship with one another. If she becomes defensive or upset, then you may have to limit her interaction with them, or have them interact with her separately.
  • Question
    How can you always be right?
    Community Answer
    You cannot always be right, and that lesson takes time to figure out. However, you can always be sensible and understanding, which is usually much better than being right.
  • Question
    I got into trouble at school because my classmates said I was making them uncomfortable, but I think they are making excuses so they can get away from me. How do I prove they made false statements?
    TamF
    Community Answer
    It depends on what you were doing to cause them to be uncomfortable. If you actually acted in a way that made them uncomfortable, then you are wrong. If you did nothing and they are inventing it, then simply tell the truth about what happened.
  • Question
    I am in a lasting argument with an enemy. We are constantly telling each other that the other person is wrong. I have proven I am right, but he still thinks he is. How can i finally defeat him?
    Tom De Backer
    Top Answerer
    Drop it. If you have been proven right, by yourself or others, then you are right regardless of whether or not your enemy confirms it. If he stubbornly holds on to his own truth, then he is no longer a worthy opponent, but a weaker one. You can safely ignore him. Don't be as petty as he is.
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