Explain why you’re going to enforce limits. “I can tell you’ve been taking advantage of me and I’ve decided it needs to stop.” “You’re an adult and as much as I want to help you with everything, you need to take responsibility for your own actions now.” Set boundaries for how much assistance you’ll give them. “I’m not comfortable giving you any more money. I don’t think you’re putting it to good use and I’m not going to enable your bad decisions anymore.” “I’ll help you buy your groceries for the next three months until you get a job. After that, you need to be able to support yourself.” Ask them to contribute to room and board if they live at home. “I can’t let you stay at home without contributing anymore. You need to pay a portion of the rent and cook a few meals if you’re going to live at home for any longer.” “You’re taking advantage of the fact that I care about you and I’m not OK with that anymore. From this point forward, I’ll treat you like someone who’s renting a room from me, which means you’ll be paying me rent every month.” Explain firmly if you need to cut off communication. “As much as I love you, I can’t have a relationship with you anymore. You’re being abusive towards me and the rest of our family and I don’t want you to contact any of us anymore.” “I can’t be a part of your life any more if you treat me this way. Please don’t call me or come to see me anymore, because I’m not going to respond.” Let them know what the consequences will be if your limits aren’t respected. “If you try to come into the house drunk again, I’m going to call the police.” “If you use drugs again, I’m going to ask you to move out of this house.”