This article was co-authored by Kendall Payne
and by wikiHow staff writer, Bailey Cho
. Kendall Payne is a Writer, Director, and Stand-up Comedian based in Brooklyn, New York. Kendall specializes in directing, writing, and producing comedic short films. Her films have screened at Indie Short Fest, Brooklyn Comedy Collective, Channel 101 NY, and 8 Ball TV. She has also written and directed content for the Netflix is a Joke social channels and has written marketing scripts for Between Two Ferns: The Movie, Astronomy Club, Wine Country, Bash Brothers, Stand Up Specials and more. Kendall runs an IRL internet comedy show at Caveat called Extremely Online, and a comedy show for @ssholes called Sugarp!ss at Easy Lover. She studied at the Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre and at New York University (NYU) Tisch in the TV Writing Certificate Program.
There are 10 references
cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources.
Cracking a joke about school is a great way to keep kids engaged and bring joy and laughter into the classroom. In this article, weโre providing the ultimate list of school jokes about teachers, students, supplies, and more that are safe for all ages. Whether youโre a teacher, parent, or child looking for a laugh, read on for the most clean and kid-friendly school jokes!
Hilarious School Jokes & Puns for Kids
- What do elves learn in school? The elf-abet.
- Whatโs a math teacherโs favorite dessert? Pi.
- Where do pencils go on vacation? Pencil-vania.
- How do bees get to school? On the school buzz.
- Why was the broom late for school? He over-swept.
- Whatโs the blackboardโs favorite drink? Hot chalk-olate.
- What does a thesaurus eat for breakfast? A synonym roll.
Steps
Funny Kid Jokes About School
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Spread joy in the classroom with these kid-friendly school jokes. Telling a school joke is a great way to break the ice when starting class, introducing a new topic, or keeping students happy and engaged. Here are some funny jokes about homework, lunchtime, school supplies, and more to make a child smile:
- How do you get straight Aโs? By using a ruler.
- Where do pencils go on vacation? Pencil-vania.
- Which building has the most stories? The library.
- What are the coolest letters of the alphabet? AC.
- What did the paper say to the pencil? โWrite on!โ
- Where do surfers go to school? Boarding school.
- Whatโs the most tired school supply? A knapsack.
- What do you need to go to high school? A ladder.
- What does your computer do for lunch? Has a byte.
- Which letter holds the most amount of water? The C.
- What do you call a school for ice cream? Sundae school.
- Why was the notebook so popular? It had all the right lines.
- When is a blue book not blue anymore? When itโs been red!
- Whatโs the eraserโs life motto? โEverybody makes mistakes!โ
- Why did the bikes get detention at school? They spoke too much.
- Where do kids in New York learn multiplication tables? Times Square.
- Why did the egg get thrown out of class? Because it kept telling yolks.
- What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? โSupplies!โ
- Whatโs black when itโs clean and white when itโs dirty? The blackboard. [1] X Research source
- Why do magicians do so well in school? Theyโre great with trick questions.
- What did the highlighter say to the textbook? โIโll bring out the best in you.โ
- Why did the stapler break up with the pencil? It felt like it was too attached.
- Do you know why every book in the library is the same color? Theyโre all red.
- Why did the paintbrush go to art class alone? It wanted to brush up on its skills.
- Why do fireflies get bad grades at school? Because they are not bright enough.
- What musical instrument was found in the school bathroom? A tuba toothpaste.
- What did one pencil say to the other on the first day of school? โLooking sharp!โ
- Why did the girl do her homework on an airplane? To achieve a higher education.
- What did the pencil say to the sharpener? โStop going around in circles with me!โ
- Why did the quarterback take the hardest class? Because he knew he would pass.
- Why did the farmerโs son study medicine? Because he wanted to go into a different field.
- Why didnโt anyone want to eat next to the basketball team? Because they dribble too much.
- Why did the student throw their watch out of the school window? They wanted to see time fly. [2] X Research source
Short Jokes
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Tell a short and silly joke to get students rolling with laughter. If youโre looking for a quick joke that packs a punch, experiment with silly puns and wordplay. Here are some simple and effective school jokes to share with kids:
- Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, 8, 9! [3] X Research source
- What do elves learn in school? The elf-abet.
- Where do pencils come from? Pennsylvania.
- What school is the friendliest one? A โhiโ school!
- Why was the broom late for school? He over-swept.
- What does a book do in the winter? Puts on a jacket.
- What is a witchโs favorite subject in school? Spelling.
- Which school supply is king of the classroom? A ruler.
- Which room can a student never enter? A mushroom!
- Whatโs the blackboardโs favorite drink? Hot chalk-olate.
- What does a thesaurus eat for breakfast? A synonym roll.
- What did the paper say to the pen? โYou have a good point.โ
- Why isnโt there a clock in the library? Because it tocks too much.
- Whatโs the best place to grow flowers in school? In kindergarden.
- What do kids do during recess on rainy days? Play bored games.
- Why canโt pirates learn the alphabet? They keep getting lost at C.
- Why did the glue get in trouble at school? It couldnโt stick to the rules.
- Whatโs the name of the superhero in computer class? The Screen Saver!
- Why did the soccer ball go to school? Because it wanted to be kicked into shape!
- Why did the M&M want to go back to school? Because they wanted to become a Smartie.
- Why did the student eat their homework? Because their teacher said it was a piece of cake. [4] X Research source
Teacher & Principal Jokes
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Lighten the mood with these hilarious jokes about school staff. Studies show that sharing a laugh is one of the best ways to bring people together and build community. [5] X Trustworthy Source Greater Good Magazine Journal published by UC Berkeley's Greater Good Science Center, which uses scientific research to promote happier living Go to source If youโre trying to create a close environment in the classroom or make children feel more comfortable around you, here are some silly jokes to leave students in stitches:
- What is a math teacherโs favorite season? Sum-mer.
- Whatโs an English teacherโs favorite tree? A poe-tree.
- Who is everyoneโs best friend at school? The princi-pal.
- Where did the music teacher leave her keys? In the piano!
- Why do music teachers need a ladder? To reach the high notes.
- Why did the principal start a gardening club? To help students grow.
- What do librarians take with them when they go fishing? Bookworms. [6] X Research source
- What are 10 things that teachers can always count on? Their fingers.
- How is an English teacher like a judge? They both give out sentences.
- Why did the teacher jump into the pool? They wanted to test the water.
- Why were the teacherโs eyes crossed? They couldnโt control their pupils.
- What did the music teacher say to their class? โLetโs find harmony in learning!โ
- Why did the teacher wear a helmet to class? They were teaching โcrashโ courses.
- Why did the clock go to the principalโs office? Because it was always running late.
- Why are music teachers good baseball players? Because they have a perfect pitch.
- What do you do if a teacher rolls their eyes at you? Pick them up and roll them back!
- Why did the teacher wear sunglasses to school? Because their students were so bright!
- Why did the teacher draw on the window? Because they wanted their lesson to be clear.
- How did the music teacher get locked out of their classroom? Their keys were on the piano.
- Why did the teacher bring a broom to class? They wanted to sweep thorough the lesson.
- What did the ghost teacher say to the class? โLook at the board and I will go through it again.โ
Math Jokes
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Drop a joke about arithmetic, algebra, or geometry to make math exciting. Some students view math as a hard and boring subject, but cracking a joke can be the perfect way to change their perspective. Here are some math jokes and puns that always add up to a good time:
- Whatโs a math teacherโs favorite dessert? Pi. [7] X Research source
- Why is 2+2=5 like your left foot? Itโs not right.
- What do baby parabolas drink? Quadratic formula.
- Whatโs a butterflyโs favorite subject? Moth-ematics.
- What is a math teacherโs favorite snake? A pi-thon.
- Why was the math book sad? It had a lot of problems. [8] X Research source
- What makes a circle overqualified? It has 360 degrees!
- What do you call best friends who love math? Alge-bros.
- What did the triangle say to the circle? โYouโre pointless.โ
- Which tree is the math teacherโs favorite? The geome-tree.
- Are monsters good at math? Not unless you Count Dracula.
- Which U.S. state has the most math teachers? Mathachusetts!
- Why do plants hate math? Because it gives them square roots.
- How do you make seven an even number? By removing the โs.โ
- What do you call a number that canโt sit still? A roaminโ numeral.
- Why didnโt the two 4โs want any dinner? Because they already 8!
- What was the math teacherโs favorite winter activity? Figure skating.
- Why did the square and the triangle go to the gym? To stay in shape.
- Why donโt parallel lines ever get together? Because they never meet.
- Whatโs a math teacherโs favorite vacation destination? Times Square.
- Why is the obtuse angle always upset? Because it can never be right.
- Why do we measure a snake in inches? Because it doesnโt have feet.
- Where do math lovers go on tropical vacation? The Bermuda Triangle.
- Why do calculators make great friends? You can always count on them.
- How do you warm up a cold room? You go to the cornerโitโs always 90 degrees!
- Why did the cow become a math teacher? Because it was great at moo-ltiplication!
- Why did the student do multiplication problems on the floor? Because the teacher said not to use tablets.
- What do you get when you divide the circumference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter? Pumpkin pi!
- Why was the equal sign so humble? Because it knew it wasnโt less than or greater than anyone else.
Science & Technology Jokes
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Share a science or technology-related joke to brighten up the day. Kids are naturally curious about the world around them, and science and technology allows them to think outside of the box and be creative. Here are some engaging jokes about nature, space, chemistry, and technology that are out-of-this-world awesome:
- When do astronauts eat? At launch time.
- What kind of hair do oceans have? Wavy hair. [9] X Research source
- What holds the sun up in the sky? Sunbeams.
- What do astronauts love to read? Comet books.
- Whatโs a biologistโs favorite clothing item? Genes.
- How do astronauts organize a party? They planet.
- Whatโs a tornadoโs favorite game to play? Twister!
- How do you cut the ocean in half? With a sea-saw.
- What kind of tree can fit in your hand? A palm tree.
- What do you call a biologistโs self-portrait? A cell-fie.
- When do student astronauts eat? During launch time.
- Why did the computer go to the doctor? It had a virus.
- Why is the ocean so salty? Because the land never waves back.
- Why did the germ cross the microscope? To get to the other slide.
- How does a science teacher freshen her breath? With experi-mints!
- What do you call an acid with an attitude problem? A-Mean-Oh-Acid.
- How did the astronaut serve dinner in outer space? On flying saucers.
- What do you call a bunch of iron atoms at a carnival? A ferrous wheel.
- What did the limestone say to the geologist? โDonโt take me for granite!โ
- Why didnโt the skeleton cross the road? Because he didnโt have the guts.
- Why didnโt the sun go to college? Because it already had a million degrees.
- Why donโt science teachers trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
- Why are chemists so great at solving problems? They have all the solutions.
- What did the DNA say to the other DNA? Do these genes make me look fat?
- How did the student feel when they learned about electricity? Totally shocked.
- Why did the scientist remove their doorbell? They wanted to win the no-bell prize.
- How do you know that Saturn was married more than once? Because it has multiple rings.
- Why did the computer scientist catch a cold? Because there were too many windows open.
History Jokes
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Create an engaging learning environment with a history-related joke. Looking for a hilarious history joke to help kids remember new information? These jokes provide all the lessons and LOLs you need, and are perfect for all ages:
- Who invented fractions? Henry the 1/8th! [10] X Research source
- Who made King Arthurโs round table? Sir-Cumference.
- What is a snakeโs favorite subject in school? Hisssstory.
- What kind of music did the pilgrims like? Plymouth Rock!
- Why was World War II so slow? Because they were Stalin.
- Why is history like a fruit cake? Because it has many dates.
- How did the Vikings send secret messages? By Norse code!
- Whatโs purple and 5,000 miles long? The grape wall of China.
- How was the Roman Empire cut in half? With a pair of Caesars.
- Where was the Declaration of Independence signed? At the bottom!
- Whatโs the fruitiest subject at school? History, because itโs full of dates!
- What did Caesar say to Cleopatra? โToga-ether we can rule the world!โ
- How did the pharaoh feel after a long day of ruling? Tut-erly exhausted!
- What did they do at the Boston Tea Party? I donโt know, I wasnโt invited!
- How did Benjamin Franklin feel when he discovered electricity? Shocked.
- How did Louis XIV feel after completing the Palace of Versailles? Baroque.
- Why did the ancient Egyptians need a doctor? They had sar-cough-aguses.
- Why did the knight always carry a pen and paper? He wanted to draw his sword.
- Why did Karl Marx dislike drinking Earl Grey with his breakfast? Because proper tea is theft.
- What do Alexander the Great and Kermit the Frog have in common? The same middle name.
- Why were the early days of history called the dark ages? Because there were so many knights!
- Why did the pioneers cross the country in covered wagons? Because they didnโt want to wait 40 years for a train!
Geography Jokes
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Reference cities, countries, or physical geography for loads of laughter. If you want to get the giggles going, these geography-themed jokes are where itโs at! Refer to the globe, environment, maps, and more to keep the joy of learning alive:
- How do mountains see? They peak! [11] X Research source
- What did Delaware? Her New Jersey!
- What city always cheats on exams? Peking!
- Where do crayons go on vacation? Color-ado.
- Whatโs the coldest country in the world? Chile.
- Whatโs a pirateโs favorite country? Arrr-gentina.
- Which state has the most streets? Rhode Island.
- What is the fastest country in the world? Rush-a!
- Which countryโs citizens have the nicest teeth? Brussia!
- What stays in the corner but travels around the world? A stamp.
- What did one glacier say to the other glacier? โIce to meet you.โ
- What do you call the little rivers that flow into the Nile? Juveniles.
- What rock group has four men that donโt sing? Mount Rushmore!
- What has 5 eyes and is lying on the water? The Mississippi River.
- Why donโt mountains get cold in the winter? They wear snow caps.
- How did the mountain tell the time? It used mountain standard time.
- Whatโs the smartest state? Alabama, because it has four Aโs and one B.
- Why did the Romanian stop reading at night? They were given Bucharest.
- Why are mountains the funniest place to travel? Because theyโre hill areas.
- Why do paper maps never win poker tournaments? Because they always fold.
- Whatโs the best thing about Switzerland? I donโt know, but the flag is a big plus!
- What was Thorโs favorite thing about geography? Learning about the equa-thor!
- How did the scarecrow become a successful geography teacher? He was outstanding in his field.
School Jokes About Animals
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Throw out an animal-related school joke to make kids laugh out loud. Cute, adorable, and absolutely hilarious, animals make the perfect punch line for a variety of jokes. If you know a child who is obsessed with animals, these jokes are sure to bring a smile to their face:
- Whatโs a frogโs favorite year? A leap year.
- What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
- Which animal cheats on exams? A cheat-ah.
- What did the buffalo say at drop-off? โBi-son!โ
- What do whales eat for lunch? Fish and ships.
- How do bees get to school? On the school buzz.
- Whatโs a birdโs favorite type of math? Owl-gebra.
- How do fish get to school? They take the octo-bus!
- Why are fish so smart? Because they live in schools. [12] X Research source
- What dinosaur had the best vocabulary? The thesaurus.
- What do you call a duck that gets all Aโs? A wise quaker.
- What contest do skunks win at school? The smelling bee!
- What does a spider do on the internet? Create a web-site.
- What time would it be if Godzilla came to school? Time to run!
- What creature is smarter than a talking parrot? A spelling bee.
- Where do sheep go for a tropical vacation? The Baa-Haa-Mas.
- What does a duck use to solve math problems? A quack-u-lator.
- Why did the dog fail art class? It could only draw โruffโ sketches.
- Why did the frog take the bus to work today? His car got toad away.
- Why did the elephant miss the last day of school? He was ill-i-phant.
- What do you call an alligator who solves mysteries? An investi-gator.
- Why did the dog do so well in school? Because they were the teacherโs pet.
- Why was the fish late to school? Because they was fin-ishing their homework!
- Why did the cat go to school? Because they wanted to improve their purrr-formance!
- Why did the duck get sent to the principalโs office? Because it was always quacking jokes in class!
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References
- โ https://thesimpleparent.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/school-jokes-for-kids-printable.pdf
- โ https://rumcua.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/cheesy-jokes-for-kids.pdf
- โ https://dkc1jod44tx5p.cloudfront.net/media/pdfs/ReallyGoodStuff_JokeBook.pdf
- โ https://www.skiptomylou.org/wp-content/uploads/2019/09/100-KIDS-JOKES.pdf
- โ https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/how_laughter_brings_us_together
- โ https://thesimpleparent.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/school-jokes-for-kids-printable.pdf
- โ https://dkc1jod44tx5p.cloudfront.net/media/pdfs/ReallyGoodStuff_JokeBook.pdf
- โ https://gosciencekids.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/Math-Jokes-for-Kids.pdf
- โ https://www.sciencefun.org/kidszone/jokes/