Judgment Avoid mentioning any bad traits and comparing her to others. Instead, focus on her positive traits and how they inspire you. Examples: ✗ “Your kind of a control freak but I don’t think I can do any better than you. Will you marry me?” ✓ “I admire how caring and thoughtful you are.” Bad memories Avoid mentioning any serious fights or rifts you may have had in your relationship. Focus on positive memories that made a lasting impact. Examples: ✗ “For a while there, I thought you were a lost cause. I mean, you cheated on me the first month we were dating… but I’m willing to overlook that because I think we can have a real life together.” ✓ “Through thick and thin, our love has survived. And I’m willing to bet my future on that.” Self doubt or begging Avoid sounding wishy-washy or desperate in your proposal as it can make you seem indecisive or confused. Be confident and emphatic about your love. Examples: ✗ “I guess I want to marry you... What do you say? Pleeease?!” ✓ “My love for you is indefinite and I know I want you by my side for the rest of my life.” Cliches If you want to be creative in your proposal and write a poem, make sure you’re avoiding any cliches to make her feel extra special. Examples: ✗ “Roses are red / violets are blue / marry me / because I love you.” ✓ “I ask you to take a journey with me / To share our lives, grow a family tree / To live together in harmony / I pray you say ‘yes’ as I get down on one knee.” Added pressure Do not mention how others will react to her decision because this will make add even more pressure and may lead her to go against her true desires. Furthermore, only propose to her in front of others if you know she’ll say yes. Example: ✗ “Think of how excited your friends, family, and all these people will be when you say yes! So will you marry me?” ✓ “You’ve touched my heart and now I want to hear your heart’s reply… will you marry me?” Threats Do not say what you will or won’t do depending on her answer as this comes off as desperate, overly dramatic, and controlling. Examples: ✗ “If you don’t marry me, I’ll never love again and be alone forever.” ✓ “I’ll never love anyone else again because I found the only love I need. Will you marry me?” Financials Sharing anything about finances is tactless and will come off as ill-intentioned. Focus on love and building a life together. Examples: ✗ “I want to take care of you so you’ll never have to work, even if you want to. Plus, the tax benefits… what do you say?” ✓ “Your heart is a treasure and I want you by my side forever.” Parenting Unless the two of you have specifically discussed and planned to have children, leave any mention of family planning out of your proposal. Focus on more broad plans that the two of you have discussed for your future together. Examples: ✗ “I don’t know about you, but I want to see what our beautiful children will look like. But first, will you marry me?” ✓ “I want to build the family we’ve always talked about and raise them to be as kind-hearted and brilliant as you. Will you marry me?”