What's My Communication Style?

Take this quiz to see how you communicate with other people!

Ever wonder why you act the way you do around other people? Why some people are super quiet and others lead a conversation like they’re the captain of a ship? It all comes down to communication styles!

Answer these quick questions about your communication habits, and we’ll tell you which communication style you have!

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Questions Overview

1. When you're talking 1-on-1, what level of eye contact do you make?
  1. I try to hold some eye contact, but not too much.
  2. I don't make much eye contact at all.
  3. I hold a lot of eye contact to show that I'm paying attention.
2. Your roommate keeps leaving their dirty dishes around. What do you say to them?
  1. "Hey, can you wash your dishes when you use them? I'd like to keep the place a little cleaner."
  2. I don't say anything. It's not my business.
  3. "Don't use the dishes if you can't clean them up afterward."
  4. "Gee, it's weird how the dishes never find their way back into the cabinets."
3. What role do you usually take in a group conversation?
  1. I usually participate a good amount, but let other people talk, too.
  2. I'm quiet and let other people take the lead.
  3. I tend to take the lead in a group and steer the conversation.
  4. I pitch in sometimes, but mostly in smaller ways.
4. In a group project, your partner takes all the credit for your work. How do you respond?
  1. I correct the record and let the teacher know exactly how much work I did.
  2. I accept it. As long as I get a good grade, I don't care.
  3. I tell the whole class that my partner is lying.
  4. I find a way to get back at them after class.
5. What do you do when you're struggling with a hard task?
  1. Ask someone for help.
  2. Give up and move on to the next thing.
  3. Keep trying and failing until someone comes and helps me.
  4. Complain about how hard it is until someone does it for me.
6. A friend tells you that you've hurt their feelings. What do you say?
  1. "I'm sorry. Let's talk about it."
  2. I say sorry, then avoid them. I'm embarrassed.
  3. "I’m sorry, but I meant what I said."
  4. "I'm sorry you feel that way."
7. How do you feel about small talk?
  1. Sometimes small talk is needed to get to big talk.
  2. I'd rather not talk at all, small or big.
  3. I wish we'd all skip the small talk. It's boring.
8. What makes you most uncomfortable in a conversation?
  1. When someone starts gossiping or talking bad about someone.
  2. When I don't understand what someone is trying to say.
  3. When someone starts rambling.
  4. When someone is incorrect about something.
9. You think your friend might be mad at you. What do you say to find out?
  1. "Are you alright? You seem a little off today. Want to talk?"
  2. I keep watching them for clues, and don't say anything.
  3. "Tell me what's wrong."
  4. "Wake up on the wrong side of the bed this morning?"
10. What do you like most in a conversation?
  1. A back-and-forth dialogue where everyone has something to say.
  2. Hearing new and interesting ideas.
  3. Getting straight to the point.
  4. Lots of humor.
11. Would you say you're good at guessing what someone is thinking?
  1. Somewhat. I prefer it when they tell me how they feel, though.
  2. Yes, very good. I often know what other people are thinking.
  3. Not very. It's up to them to speak up and say what they want.
12. Would you say you handle criticism well?
  1. Yes. I always appreciate feedback.
  2. It sometimes hurts my feelings, but I know it's necessary.
  3. I don't think anyone has a right to criticize others.
  4. Only if I respect the person criticizing me.

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Practice being more of an assertive communicator<\/i> by letting other people know how you feel, and what you need in order to feel comfortable. Say, \"I think that...\" or, \"Personally, I feel like...\" When you frame your thoughts as personal this way, you make space for yourself without overstepping or being rude.","edit_links":[{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Communicate-Effectively"},{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Communicate-Better-in-a-Relationship"}],"link_data":[{"title":"Effective Ways to Improve Your Communication Skills","id":10388,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Communicate-Effectively","image":"\/images\/thumb\/f\/fb\/Communicate-Effectively-Step-18-Version-4.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Communicate-Effectively-Step-18-Version-4.jpg","alt":"Effective Ways to Improve Your Communication Skills"},{"title":"How to Communicate Better in a Relationship","id":814981,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Communicate-Better-in-a-Relationship","image":"\/images\/thumb\/d\/d7\/Communicate-Better-in-a-Relationship-Step-18-Version-2.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Communicate-Better-in-a-Relationship-Step-18-Version-2.jpg","alt":"How to Communicate Better in a Relationship"}],"minimum":0,"image":"","image_url":""},{"number":3,"text":"You're an aggressive communicator.","meaning":"As an aggressive communicator, you're someone who's not afraid to speak your mind. After all, you\u2019ve got something to say, and other people need to hear it! When someone's doing something wrong or there's an issue, you're often the first person to speak up. You feel comfortable taking charge in a conversation, and this makes you a natural leader. You'd rather get right to the point and get it over with than waste time dancing around the subject. Sometimes, though, you might talk over other people, or forget to consider their opinions or perspectives. It's something we all do, and something we all can work on.

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Communicating Better

Everyone expresses themselves a little differently, but for the most part, experts say there are 4 main communication styles:

  • Assertive communicators say what they mean, say it clearly, and invite other people to pitch in.
  • Passive communicators take a back seat, and let other people speak for them.
  • Aggressive communicators take charge, and sometimes dominate a conversation.
  • Passive-aggressive communicators use humor, sarcasm, or insults to say what they mean.

Everyone, no matter their communication style, can learn to express themselves better. Here’s how to start:

Think before you speak. It’s a classic bit of advice, but it’s true! When you know what you want to say and why, you end up saying it much more clearly than if you ramble or try to find your point on the fly. Before you speak up, ask yourself: How do I feel? What’s my point? How should I say this?

Remember who you’re talking to. When it comes to communication, your audience is just as important as what you’re trying to say. You wouldn’t talk to a toddler the same way you talk to a coworker, would you? Consider who you’re talking to and how they feel, and tailor your words accordingly.

Use body language to your advantage. Your body talks just as much as your mouth! When you’re standing or sitting up straight, holding eye contact, and facing the other person, you come across as confident and engaged. Sometimes, though, taking a more relaxed and indirect posture can help keep things casual and low-stakes.

Ask questions. Communication is a two-way street. You’re not the only one with ideas and opinions! Once you’ve said your piece, make it a habit to ask the other person what they think and how they feel. And remember to listen ! This makes a speech into a dialogue, and helps everyone participate in the discussion.

Want to learn more?

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