Q&A for How to Deal With Nosy Neighbors

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  • Question
    Our neighbor's son throws dead frogs and papers, and watches us at night. What can we do?
    Community Answer
    Go talk to his parents. They should deal with him. If he still does not stop, tell his parents that throwing dead animals and items onto someone else's property is inappropriate and possibly breaking the law. Go talk to the police if this continues unabated.
  • Question
    How do I deal with a mentally unstable neighbor who won't leave me alone? She keeps calling, ringing the doorbell, and banging on my front and back door.
    Community Answer
    Build a fence with a gate that locks and put a "no trespassing, no solicitations" sign on the front gate. If she violates that boundary, call the police.
  • Question
    How do I deal with a neighbor who thinks I am listening to her private conversations when the problem is that she has a very loud voice?
    Community Answer
    Just be straightforward with her and let her know that you can't help but listen to her private conversations because she won't keep her voice down. If she's really that concerned about maintaining her privacy, she can speak quietly.
  • Question
    What do I do if a neighbor is invading my privacy illegally?
    Community Answer
    If it's illegal, call the police and tell them what's going on. Chances are, the least you'll get is a Cease and Desist order for your neighbor.
  • Question
    How do I deal with a neighbor who constantly complains about my little dog and provokes it into barking?
    Community Answer
    First, make sure your little dog is not actually being a problem. You could ask her if she is afraid of dogs, or if she ever owned a dog herself, or if she has any pets. You could ask her to stop teasing your dog.
  • Question
    My neighbors bully me because of my disability. They are very nosy. It's getting hard to ignore. What can I do?
    Community Answer
    I would ignore the neighbors, as in not even acknowledge them, and focus on your life. Do not converse with them, do not offer any personal information and do not engage in any manner with them. If they are harassing you or doing something illegal, it may be wise to get some legal advice to stop the activities.
  • Question
    What can I do to stop my neighbor from calling my husband's military base boss and spreading lies about me?
    Community Answer
    Talk to the Military Base Boss about the problem. Then confront the neighbor and ask her why she is doing that.
  • Question
    My neighbors think I'm watching them. What should I do?
    Community Answer
    Are you watching them? If so, cease doing so and they'll stop worrying. Presuming that you're not though, ask them what makes them think this. You might need to fix some aspect of your house -- perhaps you have the window curtains askew or maybe a breeze is causing the blind to flutter and seem as if someone is peeking. Talk to them nicely to explain how busy you are and that you've too much going on to be staring at people.
  • Question
    Every time I go outside my house or open my garage, my neighbor comes out, whenever I go in the back yard do some gardening she is out calling me and talking to me. What should I do?
    Community Answer
    Wave and smile and then keep doing what you are doing. If you acknowledge her, but then get on with your business, she may eventually realize that you just are not interested in constantly engaging with her and it'll grow tiresome for her to keep trying. By being nice initially, she can't fault you but by getting on with your activities, she also can't stop you from your usual routine.
  • Question
    I have a husband and wife constantly staring through their kitchen windows. What do I do about it?
    Community Answer
    You can try installing an outdoor blind that you can see through a bit on your side, but they can't see into your house on their side - or just put a regular blind or curtain in your window if you don't mind not seeing through it yourself. You could also try walking around in your underwear so they get embarrassed and avoid the window.
  • Question
    How can I get my neighbor's dog to stop barking?
    Community Answer
    There is no one answer for this. You could try talking to your neighbors about it.
  • Question
    My neighbor is constantly watching me through her windows--it's creepy! What can I do?
    Community Answer
    Ask her politely to stop staring at you because you don't feel comfortable. If that doesn't work, call the police.
  • Question
    What can I do with a neighbor who uses binoculars to peep or shine a flashlight against my window when I work out?
    Community Answer
    They sell a one-way film that you can put onto your windows easily, similar to the film you put onto your cell phone to protect the screen. It reflects like a one-way mirror.
  • Question
    My neighbor comes onto my property to talk to the neighbor on my other side. How can I tell him to stop?
    Community Answer
    Pretty much just like that. "Would you mind not coming onto my property to talk to so-and-so?" However, you could try being a little more patient -- if they're not harming your property, then maybe you could let it go or even try to engage them in conversation yourself.
  • Question
    What do I do when my neighbor is always staring at my house, watching me, copying what I'm doing, and trying to get my attention?
    Community Answer
    Your neighbor obviously has some issues. There's not a whole lot you can do about it, he's not actively threatening you, imposing on your privacy, or harming you in any way. You can try talking to him, saying something like, "I've noticed you staring at me from across the street, it's really making me uncomfortable." However, if you believe he might be unstable, it's probably best to just try to ignore him. If the situation escalates and you do feel threatened, or if he comes onto your property, call the police.
  • Question
    Our female neighbor is constantly staring at us and intimidating us. What can I do?
    Community Answer
    Ignore the staring and the intimidating as much as possible. If she crosses the line and intimidating becomes menacing, you might want to report things to the police.
  • Question
    How do I deal with nosy neighbors who make false reports about me?
    Community Answer
    Confront them in a kind way. Maybe bring cookies over and ask if you can speak with them about why they are reporting you. See if you can work out a truce.
  • Question
    What do I do if my neighbor walks on my property with an unleashed dog and sometimes goes into my garage?
    Community Answer
    That’s technically trespassing. You can lock your garage, but if that doesn’t work, call the police.
  • Question
    What if my neighbor is nosy because she believes that I'm a threat to her babies?
    Community Answer
    As simple as it may sound, ask the neighbor why you're somehow a threat to her babies, and also explain that the spying is making you uncomfortable. An alternative option is to write a courteous and candid letter about this issue. If there's an absurd response from her or she continues to do so, then purchase thicker curtains to cover your windows.
  • Question
    What can I do legally about a nosy neighbor lady who watches us through her windows?
    Community Answer
    Nothing. If they are in their own property, they could literally spend 24/7 staring out of their window. The best you can do is make it impossible for her to see inside your house or yard by obstructing the view with a fence, trees/plants, curtains/blinds, privacy window film, etc.
  • Question
    How should I handle neighbors who keep me under constant surveillance by watching me from their windows and then texting each other?
    Community Answer
    How do you know they're texting each other about you, or even that they're texting at all? You sound like you might be a little bit paranoid. There's not much you can do about them looking out their own windows. Keep your own curtains closed, and/or build a hedge so they can't see you.
  • Question
    How do I deal with neighbors who think I am doing something illegal in my home, but I am not?
    Community Answer
    Politely but firmly confront them and ask why they believe you are doing something illegal. Share your side of the story to convince them of your innocence.
  • Question
    What should I do if my neighbors try to intimidate me and my children?
    Community Answer
    If your neighbors are intimidating you, question whether it is dangerous or menacing behavior. Talk to your local police about the problem, especially your concern for your children. Otherwise, you could go for a more friendly approach and talk to them about it over a cup of coffee. There might be a reason for their behavior, or it might be a misunderstanding.
  • Question
    I play basketball on my street, and every time I go out to play, she stares me down through her window! I can't play anywhere else. What do I do?
    Daisy Chain
    Community Answer
    If all she does is stare at you, ignore her. If she threatens you or is violent to you in any way, report her to the police.
  • Question
    What do I do if my neighbor sits on the back porch and watches me all the time?
    Community Answer
    There's not really anything you can do about that. They have every right to sit on their own porch. If it really bothers you, install a tall hedge so they can't see into your yard.
  • Question
    What do I do if my neighbor phones my parent when I leave the house?
    Community Answer
    Have your parents asked the neighbor to alert you when you leave the house? If not, ask your parents to politely ask the neighbor to please mind their own business. Otherwise, there's nothing you can do about this.
  • Question
    What should I do about my upstairs neighbors, who follow me around my apartment day and night?
    Community Answer
    Are they "following you around your apartment" from upstairs? If so, they're probably just living their life, and there's nothing you can do about that anyway. They're free to do whatever they want in their own apartment. If they're in your apartment, tell them to leave. If they're following you around the apartment building, ask them to stop, then alert management. Tell them your neighbor is harassing you.
  • Question
    What do I do about a neighbor who thought it best to share with the homeowner that they smell marijuana?
    Community Answer
    Firstly, are they right? If so, be more discrete. If your neighbor is wrong or is just being a busybody or malicious, tell your landlord they have mental health issues and try to ignore them. If you use marijuana for medicinal purposes, mention this to your landlord.
  • Question
    Every time I walk outside and sit on my porch, a neighbor will walk outside, point her arm or hand at me and start laughing. Every day for six months. Can I have her evaluated by a psychologist?
    Community Answer
    Take a bow, then shake your head to your friends while looking their way! Turn the table on them.
  • Question
    How do I deal with annoying nosy neighbors asking my children for information?
    Community Answer
    Be careful what information you share with your younger children. Ask your kids what other kids say at school about their families and have a system of identifying what is family talk and outside talk. Teach them to respond things to grown ups with follow-up questions like: "Maybe my mom or dad can answer that question better." The adults will realize they've encountered a clued-up child. It will bug them but will also stop the questioning immediately.
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