Q&A for How to Ignore Your Husband

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  • Question
    What should I do when he says it's over and he has someone new?
    Community Answer
    Walk away with dignity, and let him go. Find closure. Know your worth.
  • Question
    Is the silent treatment good when dealing with a husband who is often violent when confronted?
    Community Answer
    It really depends on the person. If being silent seems to save you some aggression from your husband, then it's probably better to do that than to confront him. However, this does not sound like a healthy marriage, and you should not stay with someone who is violent toward you. This is unlikely to ever change, and you will have a miserable marriage. See How to Divorce Your Abusive Husband .
  • Question
    My husband hit me, what I should to do?
    Community Answer
    Call the police. Physical abuse can escalate. Please seek help, for yourself and your husband.
  • Question
    My husband is very aggressive and he picks fights for no reason. Then he ignores me. He always thinks he's right and he won't even listen to my feelings. How can I stop this?
    Community Answer
    This is abuse, even if he doesn't physically touch you. Insist that he goes with you to couples counseling. If he won't make an effort to do that, leave him. Go to a relative's house or look up domestic abuse shelters in your area.
  • Question
    I am unable to bear or see my husband at home. What should I do?
    Community Answer
    If it's been like this for a long time, and you don't think it's going to change, it would be best to consider divorce. There's no sense being stuck in a miserable relationship. If there is still hope, you can try to work things out with your husband. Tell him how you feel and what bothers you. Maybe get some marriage counseling.
  • Question
    My husband spends 3 or more hours in the bathroom on a daily basis. What should I do?
    Community Answer
    That's not a normal amount of bathroom time per day, so you need to talk to him about what he's doing while he's in there. If he's using the bathroom for three hours a day, then you should encourage him to see a doctor. If he's doing other things in there, then you should talk to him about why he feels like he needs to hide away in the bathroom to conduct his business.
  • Question
    What should I do if my husband yells at me in front of everybody?
    Community Answer
    This shows a serious lack of respect for you, both as a partner and a person. You should let him know that you will not tolerate this behavior if he intends to stay married to you. If he continues to yell at you, then you should think about divorce.
  • Question
    What should I do if my husband is talking to his ex?
    Community Answer
    Let him know that you don't feel like it's appropriate for him to talk to his ex. If he continues to do it despite your objections, you may want to consider counseling or divorce.
  • Question
    What should I do if I'm suffering because my husband hates sex?
    Community Answer
    You two may need to consider counseling. A professional might be able to help the two of you work through your sexual differences and find compromises to keep you both happy. However, you may have to decide whether or not your marriage is worth saving if you'll always be sexually unsatisfied.
  • Question
    My husband always gives priority to his mother and sister, not to me. What do I do?
    Community Answer
    Talk to him and explain how his actions make you feel. If need be, seek out marital counseling.
  • Question
    Whenever I try to ignore my husband, he brings in his power tools from the garage and turns them all on to make a lot of noise. What should I do?
    Community Answer
    Both of you sound immature. You need to work on your communication -- ignoring your husband instead of trying to fix the problem isn't healthy. However, if you need some space to calm down before talking about a problem, then let your husband know that. Your husband needs to learn how to manage his anger and frustration as well. If you two are unable to learn how to communicate in a healthy way on your own, you may need to seek counseling.
  • Question
    My husband never shows affection, he's only nice to me when he wants sex. What can I do?
    Consuela Newhams
    Community Answer
    Have you explained what you need from him? Was he like this before marriage? If so, why did you expect him to change? if not, explain that you miss how you used to be so close and tell him you want that back. Keep in mind that you can initiate snuggles too.
  • Question
    My husband's priority is always his mother, never me. What should I do?
    Community Answer
    For starters, appreciate (verbally, to him) the fact that in an age when so many people don't honor and take care of their parents, your husband does. That's a pretty awesome thing. Of course, as his spouse, you must be his first priority. If you're not feeling prioritized, something has to change. Praise him and then gently explain how you feel, providing examples of when he's put his mother first over you to back up your assertion. Ask if there's any way to work together to figure out how to balance his time and attention more.
  • Question
    My husband never says sorry to me; even when if it is his fault in disputes, it's me who has to come forward to patch up. Sometimes I feel as if I have lost self respect. What shall I do?
    AbigailAbernathy
    Top Answerer
    This is abusive behavior and you need to think long and hard about whether or not you'd be happy with this for the rest of your life. Would you let your brother, sister, or best friend be in your situation where they were unhappy, abused, and feeling as if they have no self respect? You deserve to be loved, happy, and to love yourself. If being with him is making you feel this horrible then you need to either seek marriage counseling, have a serious talk with him, or consider divorce.
  • Question
    When I want to talk about an issue that is important to me but "uncomfortable" to my husband (e.g.: money, in-laws, legal issues, etc.) he yells, walks away, or tells me to shut up. What can I do?
    Community Answer
    Try to explain to him calmly, when he is in a calm mood, that it is important to discuss things like this within a marriage and important, in general, to communicate rather than avoiding communication. Make sure he knows you are not trying to attack him or make him feel bad, just to have a normal, productive discussion - and make sure you are nice, not hostile, when you bring up such a topic. If he continues to react the same way, then marriage counseling, therapy for your husband to help him with whatever it is that makes him so insecure/aggressive, or divorce would be the best options to consider.
  • Question
    My husband is homesick and talks constantly about moving "home." It's not my home. I don't want to quit my job. I don't want to be a housewife. My parents care for our child for free. What to do?
    Community Answer
    You need to communicate honestly. Your marriage will never work if either of you feels unhappy and unheard. You need to talk openly and be willing to find a compromise.
  • Question
    He often gives me the silent treatment even for simple issues.
    SwAnnTh
    Community Answer
    Be open and humble. Ask if there's anything that you've done that's bothering him, or if there's anything you can do better. Then work to fix those things or whatever you think he may be upset about. You may not be the problem, and this works both ways, but what's most important is to be humble and patient.
  • Question
    My husband doesn't communicate with me. What can I do?
    Community Answer
    Learn how to draw him out gently. Encourage him to talk openly with you. If he resists, you may need to see a counselor either together or separately. Even going by yourself would be worthwhile.
  • Question
    My husband has wandering eyes and can't seem to stop looking at "eye candy"! I feel it's very disrespectful. We've been married for close to 30 years and have invested so much! What should I do?
    Madeleine Semple
    Community Answer
    Have a serious conversation with him. Be honest about how what he is doing is hurting you, and ask him to make a real effort to stop.
  • Question
    I am frustrated with my marriage
    Community Answer
    Talk to your spouse about your frustrations. You (and your spouse) can also talk with a marriage or religious counselor.
  • Question
    My husband cheated with a coworker. What should I do?
    Melissa
    Community Answer
    Talk to him about it and verbalize how he crossed a boundary and how that made you feel. Cheating is a huge sign of disrespect within a relationship, so you have the right to be upset. It's completely up to you on what you decide to do. You have many choices. The two of you should talk about it.
  • Question
    My husband doesn't sleep at home most of the time, He must leave at home at around 17:00 pm and he will come the next morning. If I ask him where he sleeps, he tells me is none of my business.
    Community Answer
    As his wife, your husband's whereabouts are your business and you have every right to know where and how he spends his time. Continue to articulate your desire to receive more information regarding his life. Consider marriage counseling.
  • Question
    My husband always blames me when any argument starts. He will put a speaker call in front of his parents and blames me. If I text him that he shows it as my big mistake that irritates him.
    Community Answer
    Your husband sounds very toxic. Tell him that his behavior is unacceptable and he cannot treat you as he does. Or, the next argument the two of you engage in, pull out your phone and call one of your relatives or friends to tell them what an unpleasant person your husband is in front of your husband, before he can call his parents.
  • Question
    My husband doesn't talk much to me. He doesn't share daily basis matters, and he never replies to my messages, if I ask something he stays quiet, and doesn't spend time with me. What should I do?
    Community Answer
    Tell your husband that you would like him to talk to you more and spend more time with you and that he can open up to you intimately. He may have difficulties with trust, so you need to show him that he can trust you as his wife.
  • Question
    My husband thinks I'm complaining when I bring things up. He never acknowledged when our kids had issues. He said I was overreacting. This has been happening for 30 years. He only allows positive thinking.
    Community Answer
    So many of these dilemmas can be remedied with a simple conversation. Do you an your husband not talk about your qualms with each other, or do you just ignore your issues until they're too huge to ignore? Tell your husband how you feel regarding his dismissal of your feelings. Marriage counseling may also be foreseeable as an opinion.
  • Question
    My husband lacks empathy and when I tell him his mistakes, he gets angry easily and tells me that he will leave me and our son. What should I do?
    Community Answer
    Your question is difficult to answer because I have very little information regarding your relationship with your husband, so the advice I can offer is not personalized and may seem cold. You might want to consider marriage counseling or divorce. People with anger issues must resolve their emotional imbalances before they can ruin the lives of the people around them. Anger ruins relationships.
  • Question
    My husband can give me the silent treatment for 3 months without any reason. How can I cope mentally?
    Donagan
    Top Answerer
    Instead of trying to cope, find a marriage counselor. Ask your husband to go with you. If he won't, go alone. If he tries to prevent you from going, it's likely time to separate or divorce.
  • Question
    I can't ask my husband a question without him freaking out, screaming, cussing and becoming violent. I feel like my daughter and I are walking on eggshells.
    Violette Hampson
    Community Answer
    This is an abusive relationship. Please seek help, or ask someone close to you to help you with this, like a marriage counselor. If he doesn't stop this, consider divorcing him, this is not good for you or your daughter.
  • Question
    My husband doesn't apologize even if he's wrong, always I am the one doing so. What should I do to make him change?
    Community Answer
    It might just be that he has a very strong sense of self, and doesn't feel like he is wrong. A lot of people feel that way. Talk to him about how you feel and make sure that you are communicating with him. Keep the situation calm, and try not to yell, and if he wants to talk, then let him express his opinions on the matter but remind him it's a two-way conversation and you have things to say too. You can also agree to disagree on some topics that are not deal breakers.
  • Question
    What should I do if my husband doesn't give me attention? When I bring it up he says he will, but never does.
    AbigailAbernathy
    Top Answerer
    Have a serious discussion with him about this and lay it out on the table how it makes you feel. Make him aware. Give him a time frame: "Give me more attention for the next 3 months or else I'm out." If he still falls short, take that as a clear sign he doesn't love you or care for your needs at all and leave him.
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