Talk to his friends If you have mutual friends or his friends might be willing to talk to you in (in secret), ask them what they think your chances are of getting him back. Keep in mind that he may not have spoken to his friends about his feelings toward your breakup. Examples: “Just between us, does Jeff have a new girlfriend or do you think he’s missing me?” “Please don’t tell him I’m asking you this, but do you know if Terrell misses me after our breakup?” Make contact After you’ve had some time apart, ask him to hang out as a friend (either alone or with a group). However, don’t use this as an opportunity to bring up getting back together—just go out as friends. Examples: “Hey, would you be interested in going to the baseball game with me this weekend?” “A few friends and I are going out for drinks tomorrow. Would you like to join us?” Be the person he fell in love with Accentuate the traits that he found most attractive about you in the first place to remind him of how great you are. Feel free to drop some hints that you’re still interested. * Be positive and joyous * Wear something that he has complimented you on in the past * Meet at a place that means something to your relationship (like a restaurant you two used to frequent) * Bring up any funny or lighthearted memories from your past together Examples: “It’s great to hang out with you again, I’ve been missing you!” “Remember when we laughed so hard we were both crying over our dinner and the server brought us free dessert to ‘cheer us up’? Haha!” Show him you’ve changed If things you said or did in the past led to your breakup (or simply annoyed him), show that you’ve changed by correcting those behaviors. Examples: “I know you always hated waiting on me, so I made sure to leave 15 minutes early today.” “I know you hated it whenever I ordered for both of us so this time I’m going to zip it when it’s your turn to order.” Have an open conversation When you feel you’ve had enough time and opportunities to show him how you’ve improved, have an open conversation with him about the possibility of dating again. * Ask if he’s still interested before sharing that you are * Avoid crying, begging, or letting the conversation turn into an argument about why you broke up * Have the conversation in a quiet place where you won’t be interrupted Examples: “How are you feeling towards me now that we’ve settled down from the breakup?” “I’ve been wondering… do you think there’s a possibility that you might be interested in getting back together?”