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Whether you're too small to be taken seriously or people just look at you like you're a push-over, there can be many reasons to want to be "the tough guy." It can be a good way to avoid getting picked on or being bullied. Even if you're physically strong, however, it takes a little bit more to be tough. [1] X Research source
Steps
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Think positively. If you go into something with a negative mindset, the outcome is guaranteed to be negative. Believe in yourself that you are tough. Once you start to believe that yourself, it will be easier for others to see it.
- It's important that you think highly of yourself in order for others to think positively of you, as well. Do not ever put others down, however. No matter how tough you are, putting others down is a sign of weakness.
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Be strong. If somebody needs a helping hand, help out. Offer to lift something if someone is having. Showing your strength is an easy way to prove your toughness.
- You can be strong without being physically strong, too. Offer to carry heavy books for a girl in your class or kill a spider that people are scared of. Having courage is just another way to be tough.
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Be mentally tough. Having a mental toughness means being able to take things as they come to you, and handling adversity well. [2] X Research source It may not always be the easy choice, but doing the right thing even when it seems unfair is a good way to show mental toughness.
- Being mentally prepared for hard times helps develop mental toughness. Seek out small problems every day to prepare yourself for the unexpected larger problems. Don't avoid the inconvenient things, so those things won't be so inconvenient next time.
EXPERT TIPProfessional School CounselorAlicia Oglesby is a Professional School Counselor and the Director of School and College Counseling at Bishop McNamara High School outside of Washington DC. With over ten years of experience in counseling, Alicia specializes in academic advising, social-emotional skills, and career counseling. Alicia holds a BS in Psychology from Howard University and a Master’s in Clinical Counseling and Applied Psychology from Chestnut Hill College. She also studied Race and Mental Health at Virginia Tech. Alicia holds Professional School Counseling Certifications in both Washington DC and Pennsylvania. She has created a college counseling program in its entirety and developed five programs focused on application workshops, parent information workshops, essay writing collaborative, peer-reviewed application activities, and financial aid literacy events.Assert your needs to your friends. Practice asserting your needs verbally ahead of time so it comes naturally with friends in the moment — come up with go-to lines like “No, I’d prefer to stay here” or “Not today, but maybe another time.” Being able to say no confidently takes practice.
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Stand up for people. If you see someone being bullied, don't be afraid to step in. If you're trying to be tough, this is a good opportunity to show how tough you are while doing the right thing.
- Don't bully the bullies. If you're bigger and tougher, it can be easy to start being a bully. Try to avoid fights or picking on people who are bullying others. [3] X Research source
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Stand up for yourself. Don't let others push you around. If you let others treat you a certain way, then that's how they'll always see you. [4] X Research source If the situation calls for a fight, be the better man and try to walk away. If physical violence is needed, make sure it's only to defend yourself.
- You don't need to fight in order to be the "tough guy." If someone's picking a fight with you, it's because they already think you're tough. Brush off the instigator with something cool like, "I wouldn't want to hurt you if I fight you." Just be sure not to egg on your opponent too much.
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Cut your hair. Some guys think long hair looks tough, while others think shorter or shaved heads look tough. Decide what you like, and ask yourself if it looks intimidating.
- Many people associate US Marines with "being tough." Getting a high-and-tight haircut like the Marines could give off a tough appearance.
- If you can, grow some facial hair. When trimmed, it can make you look even tougher than those who can't grow any yet.
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Brush your teeth. Just because you're trying to be tough doesn't mean you shouldn't care about your health. Make sure you shower every day and brush your teeth, and always wear deodorant. [5] X Research source If you don't, people won't see you as tough--they'll see you as dirty.
- A little dirt can make you look tough, but only if it's from doing something that requires work around dirt. Playing a sport or working on a farm requires strength and toughness, so it's ok if a smudge of dirt is seen by others occasionally.
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Change your wardrobe. It may not seem tough at the time, but go shopping. Wearing old t-shirts or baggy jeans may not give you the toughest look. You might want to try white t-shirts or leather jackets. A good pair of jeans that fit and don't hang down can make you look tough.
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Roll up your sleeves. Show some arm muscle. Rolling up your sleeves makes it look like you're doing hard work, like lifting heavy objects.
- It would also be a good idea to roll up your sleeves if you're actually doing heavy lifting. This keeps your sleeves from getting snagged or in the way.
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Stand up straight. Not only is it better for your back, but standing up straight makes you look taller and more intimidating. Most people slouch or lean against something, but standing up straight and taking deep breaths make you seem bigger and stronger.
- Don't slouch when you're sitting down, either. Keep your shoulders back and your head up, so you are bigger and stronger.
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Find a workout area. You're going to need an adequate space to do your workouts. You can use a room in your house if you can move the furniture to have enough room, although you might not have all the equipment you need. You can try to use the gym equipment at your school before or after classes.
- Be sure to talk to your gym teachers if you want to use your school's equipment. A gym or your school's equipment would be better than exercising at home since you would have more weights and machines available, as well as someone to supervise for safety.
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Warm up your muscles. Before every workout, you should always start by warming up your major muscle groups to prevent injuries and strains. A good way to warm up for a work out is to keep your body moving. The point of a warmup is to get your heart pumping while stretching out your stiff muscles to prepare them or the workout. [6] X Research source
- If you're working out your upper body, a good warm-up exercise is arm circles. Rotate your arms in large round circles from your shoulder, and move them forward and backward.
- For legs, you can try jogging in place or kicking your knees up to your waists.
- Always do torso twists, which is twisting from your waist to the left and all the way around to the right. You use your torso for almost every exercise, even if you're focusing on your arms and legs.
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Work out regularly. Perform exercises to strengthen your muscles rather than strengthen your endurance. Endurance is good for running long distances, but muscle strength is what visibly builds and makes you look tough.
- Make sure you're working out hard enough. If you can hold a conversation during your workout or you're not sore the next day, you may need to increase the intensity of your workouts.
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Begin weight-lifting. Lifting weights is a great way to build muscle and look tough. It can also be a sport, if you want to get competitive. Many schools offer weight-lifting as extra-curricular activities, and it's a great way to start looking tough if you don't have a gym. Also, it's a good way to make new tough-looking friends.
- Lifting weights in high school can offer many benefits, but it might not always cause you to gain significant muscle right away. Don't be scared if you don't see immediate changes. [7] X Research source
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Join a sports team. A lot of "tough guys" you might see in school could be on the football team or the baseball team. High-contact sports require athletes to be tough in order to participate. Joining a sports team in school can help to not only strengthen your muscles, but it keeps your image looking tough, as well.
- There are many benefits to joining a sports team. They can help you do better academically, which may not seem so tough, but is important for your future. They also improve health and fitness. [8] X Research source What's better than a fit, healthy tough guy with good grades?
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Shower. Always shower after a workout. You've worked so hard to look tough, so don't ruin it by having poor hygiene and body odor. You can look tough during a workout, but looking and smelling like you just worked out doesn't always look tough in the hallways at school.
- When you exercise, your goal is to sweat. The harder you work, the more you sweat, and the better your muscle-building goes. Sweating causes odor and accumulates dirt on the skin. [9] X Research source Always shower after a workout to keep yourself fresh and clean, so you can be tough the rest of your day.
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Eat protein. During your workouts, your muscles use energy and need to rebuild. Protein helps rebuild your muscles. You should see a significant increase in muscle-building if you consume enough protein on a daily basis. [10] X Research source
- You can get protein in a variety of ways. If you don't feel like eating chicken every day, you can chew on a protein bar. Choose the best way to get protein that fits your lifestyle.
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Tips
- Just because you want to be the "tough guy" doesn't mean you shouldn't be yourself. Always be yourself, just try to be a tougher "you."Thanks
- If you tell people you're trying to be tough, some people won't take you as seriously. Avoid saying how tough you are, and focus on showing it.Thanks
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Expert Interview
Thanks for reading our article! If you’d like to learn more about surviving school, check out our in-depth interview with Alicia Oglesby .
References
- ↑ http://www.artofmanliness.com/2013/10/03/you-may-be-strong-but-are-you-tough/
- ↑ http://www.military.com/military-fitness/navy-special-operations/mental-toughness
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/happiness-in-world/201204/standing-against-the-bully
- ↑ http://www.forbes.com/sites/margiewarrell/2015/05/17/stand-up-for-yourself-you-teach-people-how-to-treat-you/#5d63438cd9d6
- ↑ http://www.hygieneexpert.co.uk/whatispersonalhygiene.html
- ↑ http://greatist.com/move/whats-ideal-warm-up
- ↑ http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/11/24/phys-ed-the-benefits-of-weight-training-for-kids/?_r=0
- ↑ http://www.muhealth.org/services/pediatrics/conditions/adolescent-medicine/benefits-of-sports/
- ↑ http://www.medicaldaily.com/sweat-it-out-5-surprising-health-benefits-sweating-actually-dont-stink-309718
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