Q&A for How to Attract People

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What attracts people to each other?

John Keegan
Dating Coach
John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.

John Keegan

Dating Coach

Expert Answer

It's complicated for sure, but a large chunk of it boils down to shared values and personality traits. For example, if you're super interested in sports, you work out regularly, and you're highly extroverted, you're probably going to be attracted to people who are physically fit, active, friendly, and talkative.

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Question

How do you attract quality people?

John Keegan
Dating Coach
John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.

John Keegan

Dating Coach

Expert Answer

You have to make sure that you're working on yourself. Pursue things you enjoy, exercise, develop your hobbies, and so on. A lot of people want to attract a super confident, ambitious, and active partner, but they aren't necessarily any of those things. It ends up causing an unrealistic expectation. You have to make sure you're taking care of yourself to attract quality people.

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Question

How can I overcome shyness and be more social?

Community Answer

Sometimes, you just have to push yourself to say "Hi" to another person. If the conversation doesn't work out, excuse yourself politely and try someone else. If it does work out, keep going, and remind yourself that everyone can be shy. Meeting people with a friend can ease fear, and then you won't be doing all the talking.

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Question

What topics are appropriate to talk about with a stranger?

Community Answer

Keep it vague with your first meeting. Talk about the weather, the area you are both in, sports, food, etc.

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Question

Can I still attract people if I'm not beautiful?

Community Answer

Yes, you can. Instead of focusing on your appearance, focus on your personality, sense of humor, and hobbies.

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Question

How do I overcome stage fright?

Community Answer

Take it slow, and in time, enter in a local talent show with friends.

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Question

I want my friend to spend more time with me than she does with others. How can I do this?

Community Answer

Tell him or her how you feel and that you feel uncomfortable with it. You also could plan group outings to get to know the other person.

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Question

What do people need to have in order to become role models?

Community Answer

In order to become a role model, you must be confident, set a positive example to others (for example, be talented at a musical instrument or have amazing grades in school). You should also smile to attract people.

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How do I deal with people who can't say things to my face?

Community Answer

In most cases such people are not trustworthy, so you are better off not spending time in their company. If it's a family member, it is important to ask them about what they talked about when you were not around, so you can find out what is on their mind. The third option is to ignore what other people tell you about what the other has talked about when you were away.

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