Q&A for How to Tell Someone You Won't Go to Prom with Them

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Question

How do you politely reject someone to homecoming?

John Keegan
Dating Coach
John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.

John Keegan

Dating Coach

Expert Answer

Acknowledge that the person feels highly of you! You could say "Wow, that's really sweet. I'm so flattered that you thought of me to go to homecoming with you, but it's not something I can do." You could also say something like "I'm actually waiting for someone very specific to ask me" or "I already have another date." As you end the conversation, say "I hope you find someone else who would love to go with you."

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Question

How do I let down a guy that is sensitive and will cry himself to sleep?

Community Answer

Be respectful about it, but don’t feel guilty. It’s up to you to go with who you want. It is also more unkind to lead him on than let him down.

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Question

How do I tell a guy I don't want to go to prom with him because he was being disrespectful? I don't want to be rude, but I want to be honest.

Community Answer

It is perfectly reasonable of you to be honest in this situation, and with any luck this guy will amend his behavior after you talk to him. Just be direct. Say something like, "You're a nice guy, [his name], but I have to tell you, your behavior the other day really turned me off." Then just tell him specifically what he did that you didn't like.

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Question

What if someone that I don't want to go to Homecoming with asks me and I say no, and then someone I do want to go with asks me? What on earth do I do then?

Community Answer

The best way to handle this is by letting the first person know (kindly) why you do not want to go with them. Don't tell them you're not planning on going to the dance, because then it will be awkward when you see them there. Just tell them something like, "I really see you more as a friend."

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How do I get out of two dates to tomorrow's prom?

Community Answer

You will need to choose which one you would like to go with, or you could always just go with friends. Just make sure you let one/both know kindly. You don't want to hurt them.

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How to escape prom once I am already in the position to go? Should I just say my cat died or should I break my leg?

Community Answer

If you really have to lie, say your cat is sick and you have to take them to the vet. This way if you have a cat you keep your story straight. Don't break your leg, that is an overreaction.

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Question

I asked this guy to go to a dance and found out we didn't really mesh with each other. Later he asked me to his dance. How do I tell him I don't want to go with him without sounding like a jerk?

Community Answer

Keep it simple and honest. Just say that you are sorry but you can't go. Or, you could say you'd be happy to return the favor if he needs a partner at the last minute but only as someone helping out because you don't think the two of you have a future.

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Question

This girl told me a while back that if I asked her to slow dance she would say no. My problem is at a more recent dance she was giving me “signs” that I should’ve asked her but I’m scared of rejection.

Anonymousfigure

Community Answer

That was a while back. She must have changed her mind if she's giving you "signs", also she might have been playing around. Ask her!

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Question

How do I turn someone down for prom when I want to go with someone else?

Brooke

Community Answer

Politely tell them something along the lines of, "It would be great hanging out with you at prom, and I'm delighted that you asked me, but I've currently set my eyes on someone else, and I hope that's okay." They should be able to understand what you mean.

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