Separate your interpretations from the facts. Interpretation: “I can’t believe I didn’t get that promotion. I’ll never go anywhere in my career.” Fact: “It feels bad to know that I didn’t get that promotion, even though I worked really hard for it. This sucks, but if I keep working hard, I’ll get another opportunity.” Interpretation: “If this date doesn’t go well, I’m hopeless. I’ll never find anyone.” Fact: “I have a date tonight and she seems really cool. It’s natural to be nervous. I hope we hit it off, and it’ll hurt if we don’t, but I’ll be OK.” Notice when you’re jumping to conclusions. “No one has talked to me yet. Everyone must think I’m weird or awkward.” “He didn’t laugh at my joke. He thinks I’m desperate and he can’t wait to walk away.” Make yourself think of the worst thing that could happen, and how likely it is. “The worst thing that could happen is that I could fail this class. If that’s the case, I’ll have to take it again next year. That wouldn’t be fun, but I wouldn’t be repeating the grade, just this one class. And it’s not likely that I’ll fail this class—I’ve been studying really hard for the final and going to tutoring.” “The worst thing that could happen is that the date doesn’t go well, and we go our separate ways. That won’t feel good, but we’ll both be OK. We’ve talked a lot online and get along really well, so the chances of that happening are low.” Accept your fear of failure, but don’t let it control you. “It’s OK to be freaked out that I’ll screw up this interview. I’m going to prepare for it and try to get this job anyways.” “This is a huge game, so of course I’m nervous. But I know I’m a good player and if I stay focused, it’ll be OK.”