How to Address Envelopes to a Family: Expert Tips & Guidelines

PDF download Download Article
Proper ways to address a letter to an entire family
PDF download Download Article

Addressing an envelope to a single person is a cinch—you just need their name and title, and you’re good to go. Addressing an envelope to a whole family, however, is a different matter, and it varies depending on the formality of your letter. For this article, we interviewed etiquette coach Tami Claytor to teach you all the best ways to address an envelope to a family, including using the family’s surname, addressing individual family members, and addressing an outer and inner envelope. Plus, get general tips and guidelines to properly address your envelope.

How do you address a family on an envelope?

For a simple solution, write “The (Surname) Family” or use the plural form of the family’s last name. For more formal occasions, write the names of the parents or heads of household on the first line, then write the names of any children on the second line. Then, format the rest of the envelope as usual.

Section 1 of 4:

Using the Family’s Surname

PDF download Download Article
  1. When addressing an envelope to an entire family rather than a single individual, you have two options: use the family name to represent the entire family or specifically address the envelope to some (or all) of the family members. Writing “The (Surname) Family” is the more formal option, though it’s also appropriate for general communication, like friendly letters. [1] However, this option may be unwise if it’s important to know who the letter is specifically for (like wedding invitations ).
    • For example, if you’re writing a letter to Tim and Janet Jones and their children, Emma and Peter, address the envelope to “The Jones Family.”
    • Claytor says, “On the envelope, make sure it says “family” so whoever opens the mail realizes the message is for everyone.” [2]
  2. It’s also acceptable to simply use the plural form of the family’s surname as the first line of the envelope’s address. In this case, the plural family name is always preceded by the word “The” so that the final result is in the form of “The Smiths,” “The Garcias,” and so on. [3] This is generally considered the more casual option, so it may not be appropriate for formal letters.
    • Do not use apostrophes to make a last name plural. Apostrophes are used to convey possession. Most family names simply need an “-s” at the end to become plural (e.g., Thompsons, Lincolns). However, names that end with an “s,” “sh,” or “x” sound usually need an “-es” at the end (e.g. Roses, Foxes, Welshes).
    • For example, if you’re writing a letter to the Jones family, you would write “The Joneses.”
    Advertisement
  3. Claytor says, “We now have families where not everyone shares the same name, so you would put the last name of both adults and [include] family after that.” [4] In the case of blended families, unmarried couples, or any other family that has different surnames, address each person’s surname to show respect. For example, if you were writing to Jim Green and Donna Smith, address the envelope to “Mr. Jim Green and Ms. Donna Smith.” Another option is to write “The Green-Smith Family” to simplify the address. [5]
    • Depending on the situation, it may also be appropriate to send an individual letter to each person. For example, if you were writing to the divorced parents of a child, address one envelope to “Mr. Jim Green” and another to “Ms. Donna Smith.”
  4. Regardless of the method you use for the first line of your envelope’s address, the rest of the address is written as it would be for any other letter. Under the first line containing the family name, write the street number or PO box. On the next line, write the city, state/province, postal code, and so on. If writing internationally, write the name of the country below on a separate fourth line. Write your return address in the same fashion in the top left corner of the envelope. [6]
    • For example, a final address might look something like this:
      • The Jones Family (or "The Joneses")
        21 Jump Street
        Anytown, CA, 98765
    5. Advertisement
Section 2 of 4:

Using Specific Family Members’ Names

PDF download Download Article
  1. When addressing an envelope to an entire family, another option is to name some or all of them individually. This method is useful for letters, for which it’s important to convey who the letter is specifically for, such as wedding invitations. On the first line of your address, write the parents’ names, using their appropriate titles (ex: Mr. and Mrs. Jones). Mr. and Mrs. are usually safe, while titles like “Dr.,” “Judge,” and so on are usually optional outside of formal or professional contexts. [7]
    • It’s also acceptable to use the traditional form of describing married couples, in which the husband’s full name serves for both partners: “Mr. and Mrs. Tim Jones.” However, this method isn’t necessary, and some couples may find it outdated.
    • Another option is to write each partner’s full name, sans titles: “Tim and Janet Jones.” This is typically used in familiar, informal contexts, as using someone’s first name rather than their title can be seen as rude if you don’t know them well.
    • For same-sex couples , you might consider including both individuals’ first names to avoid any confusion when pluralizing titles. For example, “Mrs. Ashley Young and Mrs. Rosa Young” or “Mr. David Lewis and Mr. Patrick Lewis.”
    EXPERT TIP

    Tami Claytor

    Etiquette Coach
    Tami Claytor is an Etiquette Coach, Image Consultant, and the Owner of Always Appropriate Image and Etiquette Consulting in New York, New York. With over 20 years of experience, Tami specializes in teaching etiquette classes to individuals, students, companies, and community organizations. Tami has spent decades studying cultures through her extensive travels across five continents and has created cultural diversity workshops to promote social justice and cross-cultural awareness. She holds a BA in Economics with a concentration in International Relations from Clark University. Tami studied at the Ophelia DeVore School of Charm and the Fashion Institute of Technology, where she earned her Image Consultant Certification.
    Tami Claytor
    Etiquette Coach

    Be sure to include proper titles. If they are, for example, a doctor, put “Dr.” If they’re a lawyer, put their name comma “Esquire.” Then, just write the address as regular—the street, city, state, and zip code.

  2. On the next line, list the names of any children who are under 18 and live as dependents of the parents. Provide the family name once at the end of the list of names (e.g., David, Chelsea, and Gabriela Richardson), or leave it out entirely (e.g., David, Chelsea, and Gabriela). If you know the ages of the children, list them from oldest to youngest. [8]
    • For example, the first two lines of your address might look like this:
      • Mr. and Mrs. Jones
        Emma and Peter
  3. In situations where you don’t know the names of any or all children in the family, it’s acceptable to refer to them collectively. In this case, on the second line where you would normally name the children, write “and Family” instead. You may also use “and Children” to make your intent more specific.
    • For example, the first two lines of your address might look like this:
      • Mr. and Mrs. Jones
        and Children
  4. In some cases, your letter may only be intended for the adults in a family. If the contents of your letter don’t pertain to the children, name the relevant recipients in the first line, then proceed immediately to the street address without using a second line to list additional family members. [9]
    • For instance, if you only want to invite the parents of the Jones family to a party, use the standard “Mr. and Mrs. Jones” without naming any of their children.
  5. If the family contains any children over 18 (or the traditional age of adulthood in the recipient’s community), send those children their own separate letter in addition to the one you send their parents. Receiving your own mail is a sign of adulthood. Though it’s relatively minor, it can be perceived as somewhat insulting to, for instance, be invited to a party via a letter addressed to one’s parents. [10]
  6. If multiple generations of adults live in the same household, it’s important to address them all so that each generation is properly acknowledged. For example, write “Mr. John Smith Sr., Mr. John Smith Jr., and Family.” For less formal occasions, however, it’s usually okay to address the entire family as “The (Surname) Family.”
    • Another traditional option is to write “Mr. and Mrs. John Smith, Mr. and Mrs. George Smith, and Family.” If each generation has a different surname, be sure to list each one.
    • For casual events, it’s also okay to simply address each individual by their first name.
  7. If you’re addressing a child directly rather than the parents or the whole family, write their first and last names the way you would for an adult. For formal letters, write “C/O (their parents’ names)” on the second line. This stands for “care of.” [11]
    • For example, an envelope addressed to a child named Nicole Lopez might look like this:
      • Nicole Lopez
        C/O Mr. Jorge Lopez and Mrs. Maria Lopez
    • Claytor provides an example of when you might want to send a child their own envelope: “If there are young children in the house—say they’re about 7 or 8—they’d like to get a card. Send them a Christmas card… and they’ll think they’re grown up.” [12]
    8. Advertisement
Section 3 of 4:

Using an Inner and Outer Envelope

PDF download Download Article
  1. Some types of letters make a point of requesting a response from the recipient. In these situations, a small, usually pre-addressed reply envelope is often included inside the outer envelope. These two envelopes are usually addressed slightly differently when the recipient is an entire family. To start, address the outer envelope with only the names of the parents or heads of household. [13]
    • For example, if you’re inviting the entire Jones family to your wedding, address the outer envelope as “Mr. and Mrs. Jones,” “Mr. and Mrs. Tim Jones,” or “Tim and Janet Jones.”
  2. For the inner return envelope, the rules differ somewhat. If you’re requesting a response for every member of the family (for instance, if you’re inviting the entire family to your wedding), write the parents’ names on the first line of the address and the children’s names on the second line. [14] If you’re only requesting a response from the parents, however, only write their names on the first line, then proceed to the street address.
    • For example, if you’re inviting Mr. and Mrs. Jones and their children, the first two lines of the inner envelope’s return address would look something like this:
      • Mr. and Mrs. Jones
        Emma and Peter
  3. Regardless of who you’re requesting a response from, it’s a sign of courtesy to pre-stamp your letter’s return envelope. Including a stamp is more a sign of respect and care than financial aid, so avoid a minor faux pas by taking the time to give your letter’s return envelope a stamp. [15]
    • Remember to send separate letters to children who are over 18. When sending a letter with a return envelope, this means you’ll need to address and stamp each return envelope with the name of the over-18 child in the return address, as well.
    4. Advertisement
Section 4 of 4:

General Guidelines for Addressing Envelopes

PDF download Download Article
  1. How formal or casual the event is will determine how you should address the family you’re writing to. For formal letters , use full names and titles (e.g. Dr., Mrs., Reverend, etc.) and list each family member individually to show respect and attention to detail. Avoid using nicknames or abbreviations (e.g. Ave instead of Avenue), as well. [16]
    • For casual correspondence, it’s okay to use first names only or address the family as a unit. Nicknames and abbreviations are also acceptable.
    • Claytor says, “I would say if it’s close relatives, the Mr. and Mrs. isn’t necessarily required, but I always put that because I’m a traditionalist.” [17]
  2. If the parents of a family are divorced, it’s generally a good idea to send separate invitations to each parent, especially if the event is formal. For blended or multi-generational families, consider the relationships within the family and acknowledge each family member or generation appropriately. For example, if individuals have different surnames, be sure to include all names to show respect.
    • If you know the family’s dynamics are more relaxed and it won’t offend anyone, it may be okay to address everyone together as “The (Surname) Family.”
    • If you’re not sure how to address a certain family, ask them! For example, some separated couples may be fine with receiving a joint invitation.
  3. Using proper titles is an important way to show respect. If you know someone is a doctor or reverend, for example, address them as such rather than using “Mr.” or “Mrs.” Be sure to pair each title with the appropriate name. [18]
    • If multiple people have a title, make sure to address them all as such. For example, if Beth and David Green are both doctors, address them as “Dr. Beth Green and Dr. David Green.”
    • Boys and men without a specific title should usually be addressed as “Mr.” Girls under 18 should be addressed as “Miss,” unmarried women are addressed as “Ms.,” and most married women are addressed as “Mrs.” Some married women may prefer “Ms.,” however, especially if they kept their maiden name.
    • Some non-binary people use the title “Mx.,” but check with them first to find out how they prefer to be addressed.
    • Using the proper title shows respect to the recipient. Claytor says, “For example, if you’re sending [a letter] to the President of the United States, you would say President Joe Biden. You wouldn’t say Mr. Joe Biden, right?” [19]
  4. Regardless of formality, make sure your recipient knows exactly who the letter or invitation is addressed to. Avoid any abbreviations that could cause confusion, and be direct if the recipients are allowed to bring additional people. [20]
    • For example, if you’re inviting a couple to a child-free event, don’t address your envelope to the family as a whole. This may imply that the couple’s children are invited, as well. On the invitation itself, specify that the event is child-free.
    5. Advertisement

Expert Q&A

Search
Add New Question
  • Question
    Should I send holiday cards individually or to the whole family?
    Tami Claytor
    Etiquette Coach
    Tami Claytor is an Etiquette Coach, Image Consultant, and the Owner of Always Appropriate Image and Etiquette Consulting in New York, New York. With over 20 years of experience, Tami specializes in teaching etiquette classes to individuals, students, companies, and community organizations. Tami has spent decades studying cultures through her extensive travels across five continents and has created cultural diversity workshops to promote social justice and cross-cultural awareness. She holds a BA in Economics with a concentration in International Relations from Clark University. Tami studied at the Ophelia DeVore School of Charm and the Fashion Institute of Technology, where she earned her Image Consultant Certification.
    Tami Claytor
    Etiquette Coach
    Expert Answer
    That depends. If there are young children in the house, send them an age-appropriate card—it'll make them feel grown up. If the home is filled with parents and adult children, you can just address the card to "The Smith Family." You could also send individual cards to family members if they don't live together.
    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
    Thank you for your feedback.
    If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow
    Yes No
    Not Helpful 1 Helpful 4
  • Question
    Can I address a graduation invitation by using the husband's first and last name followed by et al?
    Community Answer
    "Et al" is very businesslike; it's more for a company president and his assorted associates. Go with "To Mr. John & Mrs. Jill McGuffin and Family" or "To Mr. & Mrs. John McGuffin and Family."
    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
    Thank you for your feedback.
    If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow
    Yes No
    Not Helpful 2 Helpful 12
  • Question
    If there is only a Mr. and a Mrs. in a family, is it wrong to write The Jones Family?
    Community Answer
    No. It might technically be more appropriate to address the envelope to Mr. and Mrs. Jones, but a family can consist of only a couple.
    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
    Thank you for your feedback.
    If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow
    Yes No
    Not Helpful 3 Helpful 8
See more answers
Ask a Question
200 characters left
Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered.
Submit
      Advertisement

      Video

      Tips

      • Double-check that you have all the names and addresses correct before sending your letter.
        Thanks
        Helpful 0 Not Helpful 0
      • Traditionally, the man’s name goes first when addressing a heterosexual couple. However, it is acceptable to address the woman first, especially if you know her better.
        Thanks
        Helpful 0 Not Helpful 0
      Submit a Tip
      All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being published
      Name
      Please provide your name and last initial
      Submit
      Thanks for submitting a tip for review!
      Advertisement

      You Might Also Like

      How to
      Make an Envelope
      How to
      Write an Address on an Envelope
      How to
      Address a Business Envelope Effectively
      How to
      Address Clasp Envelopes
      How to
      Use "ATTN" to Address Mail
      How to
      Use Care of to Address Letters or Packages
      How to
      Label an Envelope: A Complete Guide (with Examples)
      The Proper Way to Return Unwanted and Wrongly Delivered Mail
      How to
      Address a Letter to Canada
      How to
      Write an Address with an Apartment Number
      How to
      Address a Postcard
      How to
      Format a Return Address for Letters & Packages
      How to
      Address a Letter to France
      How to
      Write a Professional Mailing Address on an Envelope
      Advertisement

      References

      1. ↑ https://www.howjoyful.com/addressing-envelope/
      2. ↑ Tami Claytor. Etiquette Coach. Expert Interview. 20 May 2021.
      3. ↑ https://www.realsimple.com/work-life/work-life-etiquette/how-to-pluralize-last-names
      4. ↑ Tami Claytor. Etiquette Coach. Expert Interview. 16 February 2022.
      5. ↑ https://www.theknot.com/content/addressing-wedding-invitations
      6. ↑ https://www.luther.edu/offices/mail-center/addressing-envelopes-packages
      7. ↑ https://www.weddingwire.ca/wedding-ideas/envelope-addressing-etiquette--c148
      8. ↑ https://www.weddingwire.ca/wedding-ideas/envelope-addressing-etiquette--c148
      9. ↑ https://www.theknot.com/content/addressing-wedding-invitations
      1. ↑ https://www.theknot.com/content/addressing-wedding-invitations
      2. ↑ https://faq.usps.com/s/article/How-do-I-address-mail-In-care-of
      3. ↑ Tami Claytor. Etiquette Coach. Expert Interview. 30 September 2020.
      4. ↑ https://parade.com/living/how-to-address-an-envelope
      5. ↑ https://todays-weddings.com/planning/invitations/addressing-inner-envelopes/
      6. ↑ https://banterandcharm.com/BanterAndCharm_EnvelopeAddressingGuide.pdf
      7. ↑ https://www.weddingwire.ca/wedding-ideas/envelope-addressing-etiquette--c148
      8. ↑ Tami Claytor. Etiquette Coach. Expert Interview. 16 February 2022.
      9. ↑ https://www.theknot.com/content/addressing-wedding-invitations
      10. ↑ Tami Claytor. Etiquette Coach. Expert Interview. 16 February 2022.
      11. ↑ https://todays-weddings.com/planning/invitations/addressing-inner-envelopes/

      About This Article

      Article Summary X

      To address an envelope to a family, write, “The (Surname) Family” above their address on the front of the envelope. For example, to write a letter to Tim and Janet Smith and their kids, you would write, “The Smith Family.” Similarly, you can use the plural version of their last name, such as “The Smiths”. Alternatively, you can use the parents’ names and titles followed by the words, “and Family,” or “and Children.” For tips on when you should omit children from the address on the envelope, read on!

      Did this summary help you?
      In other languages
      Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 709,595 times.

      Reader Success Stories

      • Robbie R.

        Jun 6, 2016

        "While addressing Graduation Announcements, I couldn't remember how to address a formal envelope to a family ..." more
      More reader stories Hide reader stories
      Share your story

      Did this article help you?

      Advertisement