If you are straight, cisgender and/or perisex, you can be an LGBTQ ally. You do not need to be part of the community to understand and respect LGBTQ folks and be just as supportive of them. Here are some ways to be a better ally and show your support for LGBTQ individuals.
Steps
Part 1
Part 1 of 2:
Preparing Yourself
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Be secure in yourself. Being an ally for the LGBTQ community does not make you a part of it. If people ask whether you support the LGBTQ community or not, make sure you truly do.
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Know how far you want to go as an ally. You might want to march in pride parades and get involved in political campaigns, but it's valuable to be an ally in small or big ways--this includes speaking out against homophobia, transphobia and intersexism, for example.Advertisement
Part 2
Part 2 of 2:
Being a True Ally
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1Educate yourself. If you can try to understand what it feels like to be part of a gender or sexual minority, you will have more motivation. If you can try to understand their perspective, you can also communicate much more effectively to people who don't. You can find millions of articles on LGBT+ topics online, a good place to start would be with resources such as:
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Accept the diversity of the LGBTQ community. Understand all people are different and unique. Stereotypes about LGBTQ are rarely true, and many LGBTQ folks are the opposite of these stereotypes. Each LGBTQ person is different. Each person is different. LGBTQ people come in different colors, sizes, orientations, experiences, and gender identities.
- Accept people of all orientations and identities. Simply being respectful and accepting of others can mean a lot. Make friends with different people and be open-minded of orientations and identities that you may not understand.
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3Don't use slurs or offensive phrases. Using the words gay, homo, or queer as an insult loads your statement with the assumption that sexual or gender diversity is a negative thing; making it homophobic/transphobic to use language in that way. Avoid comments such as "that's so gay" or "no homo," as these are homophobic and hurtful.
- If you are unsure if something is a slur, ask a friend in that community.
- Know that some words are okay for LGBTQ people to use, but not cisgender/straight people to use. For example, some lesbians identify with the term "dyke". However, a straight person using that word is viewed as offensive and is homophobic.
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4Support trans people by using their pronouns and preferred name. It may not seem like a big deal if you're used to always being referred to as your gender, but it can mean the world to a trans or nonbinary person to hear someone using their pronouns and name.
- Check out the articles How to Avoid Misgendering, How to Determine What Pronouns to Use When Meeting Someone New, or How to Use Neopronouns for extra help.
Tips: If you're unsure of someone's pronouns, ask the person . You might see this as rude, however, it can be very affirming to trans people. It's better to ask for the person's pronouns in private. You can also normalize pronouns by introducing yourself with your name and pronouns.
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5Be an activist. Sign or create pro-LGBTQ petitions, march at pride and go to rallies. Write to members of the government and urge them to avoid passing anti-LGBTQ laws. Donate to real LGBTQ if you can.Advertisement
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Tips
- Don't act as an ally to earn praise; do it because it's the right thing to do. Don't expect cookies for being a decent human being.Thanks
- Reading about LGBTQ people can give you insight. Learning the lingo will help you avoid offending anyone.Thanks
- Avoid asking intrusive questions. Asking an LGBTQ person about their genitalia or sex life, for example, is a big no-no.Thanks
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