How to Behave On an Internet Forum

Co-authored by Luigi Oppido

Last Updated: March 1, 2023 References

There are many forums on the Internet, 4chan and "SomethingAwful's" forums being notable examples.

One time or another, you've probably used at least one internet forum in your time on the internet. Forums can be a great place to chat, as it's often easier to carry conversations online then in real life. However, they can also be a source of many flame wars, hateful attitudes, and hate -- all aspects of cyber-bullying. In fact, it has been reported that cyber-bullying had been experienced by more than half of America's teenagers. ^{[1]
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Research source} Also, approximately a third of teens using the internet claim that they were victims to "a range of annoying and potentially menacing online activities." ^{[2]
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Research source}

Scary statistics? You should be glad to know there is a way to stop it. If you're struggling with other members at a forum and want to be a voice of reason and help cut down on all the hate on the internet, or you feel that you habitually mistreat other members and feel that you need help putting an end to it, you can try doing one thing - being nice yourself by learning how to behave on an internet forum.

Steps

That way, you will know what is allowed and what is not.
If you know the rules of a place, you can avoid some trouble with the moderators in the long-term. If you're finding it difficult to understand the rules, ask a Staff Member (typically those who have a rank that includes the word "Administrator" or "Moderator" in their rank). Forums almost always come with a means of Private Communication - usually called "Private Messaging" or "PM".

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Be courteous and considerate of everybody. Consider that people have feelings, and that what you say to somebody can hurt that person. You should also be willing to lend a helping hand to anybody who needs help. If the forum you browse on has a welcome section, then be sure to welcome new users and guide them around the site as necessary.
Usually, it's not like that person is hurting anybody on purpose. Somebody speaks like a 12-year-old? Makes a lot of useless threads? Don't give them grief for it. It's not like they wronged you. You should especially not cyberbully an irritating member - not only is it plain hurtful, but please consider that it is becoming illegal to cyberbully in increasingly more states. ^{[3]
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Research source}
Don't jump to conclusions; this is important to avoid unnecessary flame wars. Sometimes, people may accidentally say something in a more snarky fashion then they actually meant, or they may have misinterpreted something somebody else said and retaliated back.
Seeing some drama at an Internet forum you go on may seem fun, but it leads to hurt feelings. Chances are, you'll also get banned, so it probably wouldn't be worth it anyway. If there's a drama event going on at a forum, don't join in. Make your efforts to defuse the drama instead.
if you meet a rude forum member. One source of regret on a forum is not making a post and speaking up in a situation when necessary. First, consider if what you feel the need to say will actually set things straight rather than just hurting them. ^{[4]
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Research source} Use calm confrontation as a first resort. Be sure that you aren't seen as acting like a jerk yourself. Also, if you pass off as a "mini-modder," ^{[5]
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Research source} people won't take too kindly to your message.
One thing to consider is if your post fits the topic of the thread? Or whether or not your post is appropriate for the forum? If you are not sure about it, don't post it. The saying, "no answer is better than a stupid answer" holds quite true on a lot of forums.
If what you want to post relates to a different topic, start a new thread.
A lot of forums regard this as spam.
Such behavior could be mistaken for trolling, which can get you banned from the forum.
That is all block capitals in any part of your posts. As this is read as shouting. But this varies depending on the forum.Some forums also forbid bold or red text. Check with the forum rules.
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Avoid bumping old threads. "Bumping" refers to replying to an old thread and is bad forum etiquette because it pushes other forum threads down. In simple: if the discussion is over, the discussion is over.
Some forums may actually ban you if you reveal that you were banned from another forum.

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What should my kids know about sharing information online?

Luigi Oppido
Computer & Tech Specialist
Luigi Oppido is the Owner and Operator of Pleasure Point Computers in Santa Cruz, California. Luigi has over 25 years of experience in general computer repair, data recovery, virus removal, and upgrades. He is also the host of the Computer Man Show! broadcasted on KSQD covering central California for over two years.

Luigi Oppido

Computer & Tech Specialist

Expert Answer

Tell them to think at least three times before saying anything about themselves. They should ask themselves, "Is this really necessary to share with a stranger?" In practically all cases, a stranger should never know identifying information about your child. In fact, it's not even safe for a child to share a picture of themselves. Reinforce to your child that they should never share their address; let them know that people can now use a reverse image search to find your child's social media platforms. Encourage your children to socialize with their own peers in real life and to steer clear of oversharing on the Internet.

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Tips

Do not cyberbully anybody. It is dangerous and immature. As said, cyberbullying is also actually illegal in a few states. ^{[6]
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Research source}

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If you're a forum moderator, then do your part to the community: be responsible, show wisdom, and refuse to jump to conclusions when banning users.

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Some people may be annoyed by Internet memes. Be careful of how much you use memes.

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Warnings

Even if you follow the rules, you may still be banned. Some moderators are just like that.

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Avoid saying something that you would be afraid or at least embarrassed to see the person's response to.

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Be cautious about posting links to your blog or website, as many forums forbid this. Even if it isn't disallowed, be certain that you aren't advertising your website in a way that others would consider spammy. If the personal info settings page has a field for putting a website, try using that. Otherwise, try linking to your website in your signature space after you've been around for a while.

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Always read the rules or terms of service that way you will understand them. And will avoid being banned.

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If you do end up banned from the forum, do not sign up again on the forum with a different user name and email address. This will only make the admins more angry. They can ban your IP address from the forum as well.

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Remember that if a thread has not gotten a reply in a long time, it may be better to start a new thread as opposed to posting on that thread.

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