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Find more purpose and passion with these self-exploration tips
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Do you feel overwhelmed, frustrated, or uninterested in life lately? Maybe you’re no longer sure of the person you want to be or where you’re headed in the future. While being lost in life may sound and feel negative now, don’t lose hope; feeling lost can be a wonderful way to find yourself and get reinspired to chase your dreams. In this article, we’ll show you what you can do right away to cope with feeling lost, plus share the best strategies to find your way forward again. Above all, remember that it’s normal to feel this way at times; getting lost is all part of the larger journey!
What to Do When You Feel Lost in Life
- Acknowledge that you feel lost and ask yourself introspective questions to determine why you feel this way. Be honest and nonjudgmental with yourself.
- Celebrate your unique strengths and talents instead of dwelling on perceived shortcomings or flaws. Your abilities can help you find direction and excitement in life.
- Start new, healthy habits that make you more mindful, compassionate, and motivated. This includes asking for help when you need it.
Steps
Section 1 of 6:
How to Cope with Feeling Lost in Life Right Now
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Acknowledge and accept your feelings. If you’re feeling lost, the first step to regaining direction is to admit your feelings to yourself. Remind yourself that it’s perfectly normal to feel disappointed, unfulfilled, sad, or helpless sometimes—everybody does at some point! These feelings are natural reactions to overwhelming events or changes that may leave you without direction. [1] X Research source
- If you’re not sure exactly what you feel, try journaling . Jot down your thoughts and physical sensations to learn more about your feelings and why you might have them.
- Denying your emotions can lead to worse feelings, outbursts, or stagnation later.
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Ask yourself why you’re feeling lost. You don’t have to unearth the answer right away. Just ask yourself introspective questions while journaling or meditating to turn your attention inward. Allow yourself to think and process without judgment; the journey to find your way again is highly personal and there are no right or wrong feelings to have! If you’re stuck, try starting with questions like:
- When did you realize you felt lost?
- Did something specific happen to make you feel this way?
- Do you have any self-sabotaging patterns or behaviors that contribute to these feelings?
- Do you feel you’ve made mistakes in the past that have brought you to this feeling?
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Show yourself compassion and make some time for self-care . Remember that you have control over how you react to your circumstances, even if you feel like they’re outside of your control. So, instead of getting frustrated with yourself, take a moment to be kind to yourself; you might try meditating, yoga, doing breathing exercises , taking a bath, or another self-care activity to calm yourself down and get a handle on your emotions. [2] X Research source
- Think about what you’d tell a friend to do in your situation, then follow your own advice! It’s often easier to show compassion to others than to yourself.
- If you’re plagued by negative thoughts, try reframing them to be more empowering. For example, instead of “I have no idea what I’m doing with my life,” tell yourself, “I have so many options available to me. I just have to figure out which ones I like.”
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Do things that make you feel good. When an activity makes you happy, fulfilled, or satisfied, it feels like a step in the right direction when you’re lost. Basically, any action that helps you feel better is progress! Carve out some time for your favorite hobbies, watch a movie you love, or schedule some quality time with friends and family to boost your mood and help you find some clarity. [3] X Research source
- Your activity doesn’t have to be something big or complicated. It could be something as simple as going for a short walk to take a break from work or calling a friend to catch up.
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Focus on your strengths and unique abilities. Fixating on your perceived imperfections can make you feel more lost or pessimistic. Instead, remind yourself that everyone has flaws and challenge yourself to think about what you’re good at. Your best characteristics and talents represent the best parts of you, and these are the strengths you can rely on to help you find direction. [4] X Research source
- Try making a list of what you’re good at or like about yourself. Don’t be picky about what you include; list anything from your best personality traits to your artistic or athletic skills.
- Remember that many flaws are temporary! If you’re aware of something you don’t like about yourself, you can always make an effort to improve it.
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Replace negative behavior or habits with healthier routines. Do you have any less-than-helpful habits that weigh you down, like endlessly scrolling through social media or snapping at loved ones when you’re stressed? When you’re lost, it’s normal to lean into these unhealthy routines and begin to feel worse (for example, constantly comparing yourself to others online can leave you more self-conscious and low than before). Instead, swap these habits with new, positive ones. [5] X Research source
- For example, when you feel the urge to open Instagram for the hundredth time, make yourself take a drink of water or look at something out the window to engage in your present surroundings.
- Eventually, these “substitutes” will become healthy habits of their own. By choosing more present, compassionate, and kind actions, you’ll begin to feel like you’re back on track.
- This doesn’t mean you can’t ever get lost on TikTok or go out for drinks after a hard day. Just do these activities in moderation instead of making them your go-to.
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Concentrate on your most important priorities. When you're lost, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed or uninspired by even the smallest tasks. So, identify your top priorities and focus your time and energy on them. These include things you must do (rather than things you should do), are urgent or have a deadline, and/or that move you closer to your overarching goals. [6] X Research source
- For example, if you’re languishing and struggling to get things done, your “must dos” for the day might be to shower, wrap up a work project that’s due soon, and squeeze in a workout to get closer to your fitness goals. All your “shoulds” (like cleaning your apartment or meal prepping) can wait for when you have time and energy to spare.
- Try eliminating distractions , like your phone or excess noise coming through an open window, to help you concentrate and feel more focused.
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Practice gratitude for what’s going well in your life. It’s easy to dwell on what’s lacking when you feel lost or down, but focusing on what you’re thankful for can help you find more purpose. Try making a gratitude list to literally count your blessings—nothing is too small to include! You might list your family, friends, and health as well as little things like the weather, your comfortable bed, or your favorite TV show getting renewed for another season.
- Being grateful helps you see how others make the world a better place. This can make you feel more optimistic and motivated to give back too, which helps you find more purpose in life. [7] X Trustworthy Source Greater Good Magazine Journal published by UC Berkeley's Greater Good Science Center, which uses scientific research to promote happier living Go to source
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Reflect on your true values and do something to act on them. You may feel lost if you’re acting in a way that goes against what you truly believe in, so ask yourself what really matters to you. Start small and identify just 1 or 2 values you feel are important, then take action that aligns with them. For example, if social justice is important to you, you may start volunteering at local nonprofits or participating in grassroots movements or campaigns. [8] X Research source
- If you’re struggling to identify your values, think about someone you admire and the specific qualities that make them admirable. Sometimes, it’s easier to see your values in others than in yourself.
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Try new things to get out of your comfort zone and find opportunities. Doing new activities or exploring new interests releases dopamine (your “feel good” hormone) and supports your overall well-being. It can also boost your brain’s neuroplasticity (its ability to change and form new connections). All in all, doing new things is a great way to get excited about life again and feel a greater sense of purpose. [9] X Research source
- Choose something that’s moderately challenging or complex to dive into. For example, you might try a painting class, even if you’ve never tried to make a full piece of art before!
- Set aside time to dedicate to these new activities. Getting in a healthy, productive routine based around something new and exciting is great for your mental health and mood.
- Not sure where to start? An experienced Advisor from Keen can help.
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Spend time with positive people and distance yourself from toxic ones. The people you spend your time with reflect your priorities and direction in life. So, hold your loved ones close and set aside quality time to spend with them; eliminate distractions, leave work at work, and do your best to uphold your commitments to them. At the same time, start to separate yourself from draining relationships that make you feel bad or inspire you to act against your values.
- For example, you may have a friend group that frequently pressures you to drink alcohol beyond your limit, or perhaps a group of colleagues that make disparaging remarks about other coworkers.
- First, set boundaries around the behaviors you’re willing to do or tolerate. You might say, “I’d love to hang out with you guys tonight, but I’m only going to have 2 drinks.”
- If the behavior doesn’t stop, distance yourself from it. If your coworkers won’t stop bashing other colleagues, you might decide to chat with different people at lunch or change the subject to avoid trash talk.
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Decide to take action. Coming to terms with feeling lost is just one part of coping; the next step is making meaningful change! If you know what the cause is, ask yourself what steps you can take next to change course. For example, if your unfulfilling job is causing you to feel lost, you might decide to set aside 30 minutes a day to job hunt, update your resume, and attend networking events to find new connections and job opportunities. [10] X Research source
- It’s OK if you don’t know what to do right away. As long as you’re actively doing something , you’ll make progress and start to feel like you have direction.
- If you’re still unsure why you feel lost, make a choice to live more mindfully and work on yourself. As you grow, you’ll realize why you felt lost to begin with, which will help you decide what actions to take next.
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Work with a mental health professional if you’re stuck. It’s normal to need outside guidance to find your way in life again. If you find yourself at a loss for what to do next or aren’t sure how to cope with your feelings, see a therapist or counselor. They can help you identify your feelings and the causes of them, as well as show you how to make meaningful changes in your life to make you happier, healthier, and more enthusiastic about the future.
- If your feelings are affecting your ability to function , contact the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration’s (SAMHSA) helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357) . This free service is available 24/7 and provides referrals to mental health treatment options in your area to help you handle crises and get back on track.
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Tips
- If you feel lost or hopeless to the point that your ability to function is impaired and you’re contemplating self-harm or suicide, contact the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration’s (SAMHSA) helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357) or the & Crisis Hotline at 988 as soon as possible.Thanks
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References
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