Whether you're bisexual, questioning, or just curious, you might want to meet bisexual people who can provide support and answers (and perhaps even a date). Here is how to find bisexual people.
Steps
Method 1
Method 1 of 2:
Finding LGBT Spaces
-
1Look for LGBT+ groups in your community. Bisexual people make up the B in LGBTQIA+ and may visit support groups, gay bars, pride events, human rights activist groups, and other things related to LGBT+ life.
- Consider groups that include allies like a Gay-Straight Alliance, and groups that are for LGBT+ people only, such as an LGBT Center in your community. [1]
X
Expert Source
Deb Schneider, LCSW, PPSC
Licensed Clinical Social Worker Expert Interview - Ask LGBT+ friends online and in person where they go.
- Consider groups that include allies like a Gay-Straight Alliance, and groups that are for LGBT+ people only, such as an LGBT Center in your community. [1]
X
Expert Source
Deb Schneider, LCSW, PPSC
-
2Look at everyone—not just the people like you. If you are white, don't limit yourself to circles consisting mainly of white people. If you're not disabled, don't assume that you wouldn't find compatible partners or friends in a group that serves both LGBTQ+ and disabled people. Bisexual people are diverse and can look like anything or anyone.Advertisement
-
3Find spaces online. If your local area doesn't provide enough opportunities to meet people like you, try the internet. [2] X Expert Source Deb Schneider, LCSW, PPSC
Licensed Clinical Social Worker Expert Interview You might not be able to find a date, but at the minimum, you can talk with LGBTQIA people and receive support from a caring community.- Tumblr is known for a strong LGBT+ community.
Advertisement
Method 2
Method 2 of 2:
Finding Out Whether Someone is Bi
-
1Don't expect them to match a specific stereotype. You can't tell if someone is bisexual just by noticing their hairstyle, outfit, handwriting, et cetera. Bisexuality is not about appearance or a flick of the wrist; it is about attraction and sexuality.
- Bisexual people may be femme, androgynous, butch, manly, or of any gender expression.
- Bisexuality is not a personality. Bi people can be shy, loyal, bad at flirting, and all kinds of things.
-
2Consider whom they show attraction towards. Monosexual or asexual people might occasionally notice an attractive or nice person of the gender they aren't attracted to, but it's not a big deal to them. Bisexual people will be in the habit of noticing people of all genders.
- They think various actors and actresses are hot (and may enthusiastically discuss this).
- They check out people of various gender expressions.
- When talking about a theoretical partner (e.g. "the ideal spouse"), they don't mention gender.
-
3Discreetly ask about their exes. If they have been dating and accepted themselves as bisexual for a while, then they have probably dated people of multiple genders.
- Instead of referring to ex-boyfriends or ex-girlfriends, they might simply refer to "exes."
-
4Try flirting (if you are hoping for a date). One way to tell if they might be interested is to put yourself out there a little and flirt with them. If they are available and interested, they will flirt back. Otherwise, they will keep a polite distance.
- Keep in mind that not everyone may know whether you're flirting or just being friendly, so try being clear or just directly asking them out.
-
5Just ask. If you have an inkling, and the person seems open enough, take a deep breath and ask them if they're bisexual. Use a polite and open-minded tone to indicate you mean no harm, and don't pressure them to answer. If they are bi and feel comfortable talking about it, they will let you know.Advertisement
Expert Q&A
Ask a Question
200 characters left
Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered.
Submit
Advertisement
Tips
- People can date nonbinary people and identify as bisexual. Bisexuality can mean attraction to the same gender and to other genders.Thanks
- Some people find it convenient or comforting to have a word for their sexuality, while others don't like labels. When in doubt, just ask.Thanks
- It's always helpful to be out & proud, so others looking for bi friends may even come to youThanks
Advertisement
Warnings
- Biphobia can exist even in LGBT+ spaces.Thanks
- Don't push people to open up about their sexuality. Some people don't feel comfortable talking about it. If they act awkward or hesitant, smile reassuringly and change the subject.Thanks
- Some people have a high sense of stranger danger. This is especially true of people who fear bigotry or are members of marginalized groups. Make sure the person feels comfortable around you before asking about their sexuality.Thanks
Advertisement
References
About this article
Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 3,796 times.
Advertisement
