How to Make Your Mother Happy

PDF download Download Article
PDF download Download Article

It can sometimes be hard to think of ways to make your mom happy beyond the obvious things such as flowers and gifts. While these things are nice, and most moms would not turn them down, there are many other ways you can show your mom that you care about her. Happiness is a very personal thing and varies dramatically from person to person, so you may need to experiment with several of these techniques before you find what makes your own mom the happiest.

Method 1
Method 1 of 2:

Connecting With Your Mom Through Communication

PDF download Download Article
  1. One way to make someone feel valued is to show interest in them: who they are, what they’ve experienced, and what they think about. Asking your mom about her life will offer you the chance to connect with her, and will make her feel happy that you’re interested in what she has to say.
    • For example, if you’re just hanging out in the living room, you could turn to your mom and ask her what her favorite thing to do was as a little girl. You’ll probably get a few interesting stories this way!
    • Research even shows that families who share stories about their family history have closer bonds, and the children in those families tend to have more self-confidence. Asking your mom to talk about her history will benefit you both. [1]
  2. Moms are just like anyone else: they need people to talk to. Asking your mom how she’s feeling shows that you’re paying attention to her and that you care about her happiness; that will probably make her very happy. [2]
    • For example, if you notice that she seems stressed, you could say something like this: “You seem really stressed right now, Mom. Are you okay?”
    • You might say, "Is everything ok? I can see that you're upset." [3]
    • Asking your mom about her day is another good way to engage with her. She probably asks you about what you did that day; why not return the favor?
    Advertisement
  3. Even small acts of kindness have big payoffs. Sending your mom a quick text during the day says you’re thinking about her, and will make her feel appreciated and special. The more people feel cared for, the happier they tend to be. [4]
    • You don’t have to write a novel to make an impact. Even a short “Hi Mom! I hope your day is going well” is enough to show that you care about your mom’s happiness.
  4. Sometimes it’s really hard to apologize to your mom, especially if you feel like she’s on your case a lot. However, apologizing when you’re wrong and taking responsibility for your actions will strengthen your relationship and make your mom feel loved.
    • Good apologies incorporate the “3 R’s”: regret , responsibility , and remedy . This means you:
      • Express regret for the hurt you caused.
      • Take responsibility for your actions, without making excuses.
      • Offer a remedy; a suggestion for what you’ll do differently next time.
    • For example, if your mom points out that you forgot to take out the trash again, say something like “I’m sorry I forgot to take out the trash. I know that meant more work for you. I’ll put a reminder in my phone for Wednesdays so I remember next time.”
  5. It can sometimes feel like your mom is your best friend one day and your prison warden the next. Instead of just thinking to yourself Why can't she do it? , try imagining what it would be like to be in her position. Exercising your empathy muscles isn't just good for your mom, it's good for you, too.
    • For example, if she asked you about your day and you shrugged her off instead of talking, that might have hurt her feelings. If you’re too busy to talk at that moment, express that clearly by saying something like “Sorry, but I have a lot of homework to finish right now, Mom. Is it okay if we can talk later?” This shows that you do care about connecting with her, even if you can’t do it right then.
    • Moms can do things that embarrass you; in fact, sometimes it can feel like they specialize in it! Try to imagine why your mom is doing what she’s doing. It could be that she’s babying you because she wants you to feel secure, not because she thinks you’re immature. And hey, you can always ask her why she’s doing what she does.
  6. Many moms love to feel involved in their kids’ lives, especially when their kids invite them to share in their feelings and thoughts. If you’ve had a bad day, or you can’t figure out a situation at school, or you have a secret crush and don’t know how to approach him or her, ask your mom for advice. This will help make her feel like you value her opinion.
    • The opposite of this also goes. Even though your mom is probably happy to listen and help you with your issues, you also don’t want the only times you talk to your mom to be when you dump your problems on her. If you’re feeling great about something, have some good news to share, or you just saw a great movie, chat with her about that, too.
  7. You probably have a lot of hilarious jokes with your friends, right? Maybe you went to see a movie one time and mispronounced a character’s name, so now it’s funny whenever you bring up that mispronunciation. Having that kind of “secret” humor just between you and your mom will help strengthen your bond and make both of you feel secure and happy in your relationship. [5]
    8. Advertisement
Method 2
Method 2 of 2:

Demonstrating Your Appreciation Through Actions

PDF download Download Article
  1. Gifts mean more when they show that you put some time and effort into them. They don’t have to be expensive, either; anything that shows that you took the time to think about what would make your mom happy will mean so much.
    • For example, if your mom loves Star Wars, fold her an origami Yoda! While it’s also very cheap to make, this gift shows that you pay attention to her interests and will take the time to brighten up her day. [6]
    • You could also make your mom a “coupon book” with things she can redeem, such as “one breakfast in bed” or “one bad joke upon request.”
    • Mix tapes may be too “old school” for you, but you can put together a playlist of songs that remind you of your mom, or songs that make you happy when you’re feeling down. Share this playlist with her, and whenever she hears that song, she’ll think of you.
  2. Maybe your mom always slipped a note into your lunch telling you that she loves you and always will. Why not try it out yourself? You can even pack her lunch for her and leave it in the fridge so she doesn’t have to do a thing in the morning.
  3. Sure, it can be embarrassing to bring your friends home to your mom. You never know if she’s going to try to haul out your baby pictures or talk about that “cute” thing you did when you were five. However, making your mom feel involved in your life will remind her that you care about her -- even when she’s embarrassing you.
  4. Doing chores can be stressful and a huge drain on time. Take some of the pressure off your mom by helping out with things you’re able to do. This works even better if you surprise her; for example, if she gets home from work and finds all the dishes done already, she’ll be really happy.
  5. Getting dinner together can be incredibly stressful. If you know your mom is having a busy week, tell her you’d like to cook dinner one night. Even if you can’t do it all yourself, offer to help her in the kitchen. You’ll learn some sweet cooking skills and get to spend quality time together.
    • Breakfast in bed is a tried-and-true classic. While many people save it for Mother’s Day. The truth is that your mom will probably appreciate breakfast in bed on any weekend!
    • Take time to figure out what her favorite foods are and make them for her. If she likes something that’s too complicated for you, or that you don’t know how to make, ask her to teach you how to make it a few weeks before you want to make it for her.
  6. It can be incredibly stressful and time-consuming for your mom to manage everyone’s schedules, especially if you are part of a large family. Keeping up with your appointments and outings on your own will help take the burden off your mom. A mom with less stress is a mom with more happiness! [7]
    EXPERT TIP

    Moshe Ratson, MFT, PCC

    Marriage & Family Therapist
    Moshe Ratson is the Executive Director of spiral2grow Marriage & Family Therapy, a coaching and therapy clinic in New York City. Moshe is an International Coach Federation accredited Professional Certified Coach (PCC). He received his MS in Marriage and Family Therapy from Iona College. Moshe is a clinical member of the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT), and a member of the International Coach Federation (ICF).
    Moshe Ratson, MFT, PCC
    Marriage & Family Therapist

    Make sure you're still prioritizing your own well-being, though. You'll be a better and friendlier member of your family if you take time for yourself, so take time to eat healthy foods, get enough sleep, and do things you enjoy.

  7. Ask to hang out, just the two of you. [8] Suggest you see a movie that you know she’s really excited about. You can offer to play video games with her or just go on a walk; the important thing is to show that you’re interested in spending time with her.
    • Outings don’t even have to cost anything. For example, if you’re both animal lovers, suggest that you and your mom go to the local animal shelter and play with the animals. Many rescue animals need socialization, so in addition to making your mom happy, you’ll also be helping cats, dogs, and the occasional ferret.
    • If she's feeling upset, ask her if she'd like to go for a walk with you. You could also distract her by asking her to help you with your homework. [9]
  8. Nothing makes a mom feel more special than her children remembering her birthday or anniversary. Send her a heartfelt letter, card, or e-card that expresses how much she means to you.
    • To help you remember important dates, put them into your phone’s calendar. If you’re friends with your mom on Facebook, for example, the site will remind you about her upcoming birthday.
    9. Advertisement

Expert Q&A

Search
Add New Question
  • Question
    How do I comfort my mom?
    Steven Hesky, PhD
    Licensed Clinical Psychologist
    Dr. Steven Hesky is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist with over 37 years of experience. He specializes in long-term psychotherapy with adults and adolescents. His training includes Freudian, Jungian, and Existential approaches to psychotherapy, hypnosis, family therapy, marriage counseling, and biofeedback. Dr. Hesky holds a BA in Philosophy from Lake Forest College and an MA and PhD in Existential Clinical Psychology from Duquesne University.
    Steven Hesky, PhD
    Licensed Clinical Psychologist
    Expert Answer
    Try to connect with her in a way that's meaningful to both of you, whether that's asking for her help on a tough homework assignment or making her a hot drink.
    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
    Thank you for your feedback.
    If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow
    Yes No
    Not Helpful 32 Helpful 97
Ask a Question
200 characters left
Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered.
Submit
      Advertisement

      Video

      Reader Videos

      Tips

      • Clean up and do your chores even without your mom asking you.
        Thanks
        Helpful 38 Not Helpful 6
      • Tell her that you love her for who she is and what she always does for you.
        Thanks
        Helpful 34 Not Helpful 9
      • Concentrating in school and getting good grades will make your mom happy; a lot of mothers worry about whether or not their child is getting a good education.
        Thanks
        Helpful 30 Not Helpful 8
      Show More Tips
      Submit a Tip
      All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being published
      Name
      Please provide your name and last initial
      Submit
      Thanks for submitting a tip for review!
      Advertisement

      You Might Also Like

      How to
      Be Respectful of Your Parents
      15 Ways to Help Your Busy Mother Out around the House
      How to
      Be a Good Child
      How to
      Deal with Parents Treating Other Siblings Better
      How to
      Make Your Mom Happy When She’s Sad or Upset
      How to
      Become the Child Your Parents Always Dreamed Of
      How to
      Be a Good Daughter
      How to
      Make Your Parents Happy
      How to
      Make Your Parents Proud of You
      How to
      Be a Perfect Daughter
      How to
      Get Your Parents to Be Nicer to You
      How to
      Make Your Parents Love You for Who You Are
      How to
      Help Around the House
      How to
      Get Your Parents' Trust Back
      Advertisement

      References

      1. ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5330336/
      2. ↑ Steven Hesky, PhD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 2 September 2021.
      3. ↑ Steven Hesky, PhD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 2 September 2021.
      4. ↑ https://positivepsychology.com/gratitude-messages-letters-lists/
      5. ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/mental-health/laughter-is-the-best-medicine.htm
      6. ↑ https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/5_ways_giving_is_good_for_you
      7. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/peaceful-parents-happy-kids/201406/how-raise-moral-responsible-child-without-punishment
      8. ↑ Steven Hesky, PhD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 2 September 2021.
      9. ↑ Steven Hesky, PhD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 2 September 2021.

      About This Article

      Article Summary X

      To make your mother happy, show her that you care about her feelings by asking her questions about herself, like how her day was or what's bothering her if she seems stressed. Also, try to help her out around the house without her having to ask, which can help make her day easier and less stressful. Even just sending your mom a quick text can show her that you're thinking about her and make her happy. To learn how to make your mom happy by spending more time with her, keep reading!

      Did this summary help you?
      In other languages
      Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 566,025 times.

      Reader Success Stories

      • Sierra Thomas

        Oct 24, 2018

        "My family was having some real problems, and my mom would always yell about nothing or the littlest things. I ..." more
      More reader stories Hide reader stories
      Share your story

      Did this article help you?

      Advertisement