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. John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.
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Looking for a rizz joke to make everyone laugh out loud? We’ve got you covered! “Rizz” (short for charisma), is a slang term that means you’re able to charm and attract people. While it’s mainly used in romantic situations, it can also be used to shake up a boring conversation. In this article, we’re providing the best rizz jokes for any occasion, whether you’re trying to flirt with your crush or make everyone giggle in the group chat.
Steps
Funny One-Liners
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Crack a joke to catch their attention. Humor is one of the best ways to bond with someone. [1] X Trustworthy Source Greater Good Magazine Journal published by UC Berkeley's Greater Good Science Center, which uses scientific research to promote happier living Go to source So, use a funny line to break the ice or make the other person smile . The following jokes are perfect for any situation, whether you want to impress your crush or give your friends the giggles:
- Wanna be Minecraft without the craft?
- Are you French? Because Eiffel for you.
- Do you like science? Because I got my ion you.
- Are you German? Because I’d like to be Ger-man.
- Are you a keyboard? Because you’re just my type.
- Are you a fruit? Because you look like a FINE-apple!
- Do you play soccer? Because you look like a keeper.
- Is your name Wi-Fi? Because I’m feeling a connection.
- Do you like Nintendo? Because Wii look good together.
- Are you a cannon? Because you’ve just blown me away.
- Are you a time traveler? Because I see you in my future!
- Do you have a map? Because I just got lost in your eyes.
- Is your birthday on October 10th? Because you’re a 10/10.
- I see you like vodka. Does that mean you’ll give me a shot?
- On a scale of 1 to America, how free are you this weekend?
- Hey, my name’s Microsoft. Can I crash at your place tonight?
- Is your license suspended? Because you’re driving me crazy!
- Are you my laptop? Because you’re really hot and I’m concerned.
- Are you a supernova? Because you’re out-of-this-world attractive!
- Is your name John? Because I’ve never Cena prettier girl than you.
- Didn’t we have a class together? I could’ve sworn we had chemistry!
- Have you been to the doctor lately? I think you’re lacking in vitamin me.
- Are you my student loans? Because I want you around for the rest of my life.
- Can I follow you on Instagram? My mom always told me to follow my dreams.
- Are you my appendix? Because I have this feeling in my stomach like I want to take you out.
Flirty Rizz Lines
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Drop a smooth line to make your crush blush. Feeling bold? Pull out a fun and flirty line that leaves little room for interpretation! Complimenting your crush’s appearance or asking them out on a date is one of the best ways to express interest :
- I want to A, B, C, you later.
- If you were a taser, you’d be set to stun.
- Do you have a name, or can I call you mine?
- I lost my phone number. Can I borrow yours?
- Your eyes are like Ikea. I’m totally lost in them.
- If you were a flower, you’d be a damnnn-delion.
- The doctor says I’m seriously lacking in Vitamin U.
- Call me Shrek because I’m head ogre heels for you.
- Okay, I texted you. What are your other two wishes?
- When can I see you again? Pick a day that ends in “y.”
- If I can rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together.
- Let’s flip a coin. Heads, and I’m yours. Tails, and you’re mine.
- Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
- I hope you know CPR because you’re taking my breath away.
- You want to know what’s beautiful? Read that first word again.
- You must be really tired from running through my mind all day.
- Do I know you? You look a lot like my next boyfriend/girlfriend.
- You’re pretty, and I think I’m cute. Together, we’d be pretty cute.
- I’m learning about important dates in history. Want to be one of them?
- If I had to write a report card on you, I’d give you straight F’s…for Fineee.
- When I text you good morning tomorrow, what number should I send it to?
- You must be related to Google because you’re everything I’m searching for.
- I thought happiness started with an “h,” but I guess it actually starts with “u.”
- You must be an overdue library book…because you have “fine” written all over you.
- I’ve memorized the first 300 digits of pi. If you gave me the 10 digits of your phone number, I bet I could memorize that too.
Witty Rizz Puns
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Pull out a rizz pun to get the laughs going. If you know someone who’s the ultimate rizz master, there’s no need to call them by their name…The following puns are perfect replacements to remind them they have game! Use any of the following names and phrases to joke with your friends, or let someone know they’re charming and charismatic.
- Rizzo.
- Rizzly bear.
- Rizz Brown.
- Rizz Khalifa.
- Mike Rizzowski.
- Walt Rizzney.
- Rizzard of Oz.
- Rizz and Morty.
- Rizz the season.
- Rizzton Churchill.
- Sonic the rizzhog.
- Theodore Rizzavelt.
- Yer a rizzard, Harry.
- My chemical rizzmance.
- Governor of Rizzconsin.
- Degree in quantum rizzics.
- Ms. Rizzle's Magic School Bus.
Silly Jokes About Rizz
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Compliment someone’s rizz to make them feel good. Looking for a sweet and silly way to praise someone? Drop a pun-packed joke about rizz to tell them they’re smooth (or to give yourself a compliment). It’s a great way to lighten the mood and deepen your relationship, especially if you’re in a group setting.
- You’ve earned my rizz-pect.
- You’re about to get a rizztraining order.
- With great rizz comes great rizzponsibility.
- You three are like Alvin and the Rizzmunks.
- I’m going to rule you like Queen Erizzabeth.
- Your lines are so slick, you must be Rizz Ross.
- Your favorite game has got to be Rizzident Evil.
- With those moves, you must be Chuck Norizz.
- Is your favorite movie Harry Potter? Because yer a rizzard!
- Are you a rizz master? Because you seem pretty irizzistable.
- I’m blonde, cute, and stylish. So they call me Rizzie Mcguire.
- Did you learn how to pick up girls by watching Rizzards of Waverly Place?
- My game is so strong, they thought I was the starting point guard for the Washington Rizzards.
- Watch out, guys. It’s cuffing season, and I’m about to be the grinch who stole Rizzmas.
- Are you Thomas Jefferson? Because you definitely wrote the Declaration of Rizzdependence.
Rizz Knock-Knock Jokes
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Whip out a knock-knock joke to rizz them up. Some knock-knock jokes have a reputation for being corny and cliché, but the following lines are the perfect blend of cheesy and charming. Starting the conversation with a silly knock-knock joke is the perfect way to show off your personality, spice up the group chat , or leave a memorable first impression .
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Anita. Anita who? Anita kiss from you!
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Owl. Owl who? Owl see you real soon.
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Aldo. Aldo who? Aldo anything for you!
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Canoe. Canoe who? Canoe give me a kiss?
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Iguana. Iguana who? Iguana hold your hand.
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Police. Police who? Police come over tonight.
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Zoo. Zoo who? Zoo want to go out sometime?
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Ben. Ben who? Ben thinking about you all day.
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Juno. Juno who? Juno I think you’re cute, right?
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? A loan. A loan who? I can’t wait to get you a loan.
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Hugh. Hugh who? Hugh have an incredible smile.
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Water. Water who? Water you doing later tonight?
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Pauline. Pauline who? I’m Pauline in love with you.
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Ivana. Ivana who? Ivana take you out this weekend.
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Baby Yoda. Baby Yoda who? Baby Yoda one for me!
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Gopher. Gopher who? Gopher me, not some other guy.
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Wire. Wire who? Wire you still standing there? Kiss me!
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Russian. Russian who? I’m Russian to get your number.
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Snow. Snow who? Snow use, I can’t stop thinking about you!
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Wendy. Wendy who? Wendy you want to go on a date with me?
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Sherwood. Sherwood who? I Sherwood like to go out with you.
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Noah. Noah who? Noah place we could go out sometime?
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Where, when. Where, when, who? My place, tonight, me and you.
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Norma Lee. Norma Lee who? Norma Lee I don’t talk to strangers, but you caught my attention.
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? Eye. Eye who. Eye think you’re the most gorgeous person I’ve ever seen.
How to Deliver Rizz Jokes
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1Wait for the perfect time to drop your line. Timing is everything when it comes to delivering jokes, so feel the flow of the conversation before making your move. In general, opening with a rizz joke is a great strategy to flirt with someone . But if you’re chatting with friends, waiting for a break in conversation can get you the most laughs.
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2Personalize your joke to show off your humor. When you’re starting out, it’s great to have a bunch of rizz lines in your back pocket. But as you progress, feel free to get creative and come up with your own material. Incorporating details from a group chat or someone’s dating profile makes your joke more relatable, plus makes the other person feel special .
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3Maintain eye contact and smile. Confidence is one of the biggest factors when it comes to rizzing someone up, and if you don’t look comfortable delivering your line, it’ll show. Make sure to look at the other person directly and flash a smile to make them feel at ease. If it helps, practice saying your joke in the mirror so you sound more natural and effortless.
Community Q&A
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QuestionWhat if we got married but I ran out of these, and now we're out of love because I ran out of these?Community AnswerDon't let that happen. Marry someone only if you're in love with them, not because they laugh at your jokes.Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
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