30+ Creative and Sexy Teases to Seduce Your Partner in No Time

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Use these expert-backed teasing tips to heat things up in the bedroom
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When you’re trying to catch your partner’s attention, a little teasing goes a long way! Whether you’re in public, at home, on a date, or just trying to spice up your sex life, we’ll show you playful, thoughtful, and physical ways to tease them and turn up the heat. Plus, we’ve included helpful advice from a team of relationship and intimacy experts. Is it just us, or is it getting hot in here? 🔥

Seductive Teasing: Quick Tips

Flirting expert Joshua Pompey says that you need some rapport to tease someone, which builds up over time. Once you have that, tease them with playful words or touches:

  • Give them a flattering compliment or a cute nickname to tease them with your words.
  • Ask them a spicy personal question or challenge them to risque Truth or Dare to make your teasing into a fun game.
  • Get physical with soft caresses, a striptease, or by sitting on their lap to show them how much you want them.
Section 1 of 4:

Playful Teasing Techniques & Ideas

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  1. One way to show your partner that you find them totally sexy and that you can’t wait to undress them is to slowly undress them with your eyes . When you see them, smile and then look them over head to toe, taking your time and making sure they see you.
    • At the same time, do something flirty (like biting your lip) to really sell it.

    Meet the wikiHow Experts

    Shelby Devlin, MA , is a sex and intimacy coach based in San Francisco, California. She has over 7 years of experience guiding individuals and couples in deepening their capacity for intimacy and pleasure.

    Joshua Pompey is a flirting and relationship expert and the founder of Next Evolution Matchmaking (NEM), based in New York City, NY, with over 15 years in the industry.

    Lisa Shield is a dating coach based in Los Angeles. She is a certified life and relationship coach with over 17 years of experience.

    Alysha Jeney, MA, LMFT , is a licensed relationship therapist based in Denver, Colorado. She is the owner of Modern Love Counseling, and the co-founder of The Modern Love Box.

  2. 2
    Mirror their movements to tease them and make them comfortable. In psychology, “mirroring” is when we copy a person’s habits or movements without meaning to. It helps both people feel safer and more comfortable. [1] But you can also use it to tease them a little by copying their movements until they notice what you’re doing.
    • It’s a bit immature and childish, but in exactly the right way. It’s silly enough to get a smile, that’s for sure!
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  3. 3
    Disagree with them to start a playful argument. Developing a rapport with someone is crucial, but flirting expert Joshua Pompey tells us it’s also something that happens over time. [2] One way to easily build rapport and even get a little teasing in, though, is to politely and playfully disagree with something they say, then share your opinion in a lighthearted discussion. This helps break the ice and get you more familiar.
    • For example, if you just saw a movie together and they disliked it, ask them why. Tell them you liked it and give them your reasons.
    • Throw in a few jokes about their taste. For example, you might say, “Oh, I knew you wouldn’t like it. Your taste is way too refined for horror movies like that.”
    • Remember that it’s all about fun! You’re not actually trying to insult them or discuss serious topics.
  4. 4
    Give them an affectionate nickname. Fun nicknames are a cute way to add some humor and affection to any conversation. They bring you closer to your partner, and can be a fun way to tease them, if you choose the right one. Go with something adorable that matches their qualities, like a reference to something you like about their appearance or their interests, then use the nickname whenever you want to be playful.
    • For example, if they have a lot of freckles, you might just call them “Freckle.”
    • Nicknames are only fun if your partner likes it. If they tell you to stop calling them that, it’s best to just drop it, even if you want to tease them.
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Section 2 of 4:

Mental Teasing Techniques & Ideas

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  1. Sex and intimacy coach Shelby Devlin, MA, tells us that talking about sex and turn-ons is a great way to increase intimacy. [3] If you and your partner are comfortable talking about sex , it’s a great sign that you’re compatible. What’s more, talking about it can set the mood and even lead to sex, so don’t be afraid to have the talk with them!
    • Of course, timing is everything. It’s best to do this somewhere private and romantic, and to ask them if you can talk about it before you dive in.
  2. 2
    Tell them what you want them to do to you. Devlin reminds us that talking about sex is nothing to be ashamed of. In fact, if your partner knows what you want and enjoy, sex is more enjoyable for both of you. [4] Even just discussing it can get you both hot and heavy, so why not take advantage of that?
    • You don’t have to do those things immediately, but even just talking about things you’d want to explore down the line helps you get more intimate.
  3. 3
    Make and hold romantic eye contact. Dating coach Lisa Shield says that “holding someone’s gaze” for just a moment longer than usual can be super steamy. [5] Wait until your eyes meet , then give a small smile , nod, and look away while you blink. They’ll be thinking about that moment for the rest of the day, guaranteed.
    • As a general rule, try to hold their eye contact for at least 5 seconds, which is long enough to make an impression.
    • Or, add a wink if you want to be a bit more obvious.
  4. 4
    Give them a genuine, flattering compliment. The perfect compliment makes someone more interested in you while bringing you closer together. It’s easy, free, and one of the most important tools in your teasing toolkit. Complimenting someone’s appearance is nice, but complimenting their deeper qualities is better! For example:
    • “I love that dress. You have such excellent taste.”
    • “Your eyes are absolutely hypnotic.”
    • “Talking to you feels like the easiest thing in the world.
  5. 5
    Whisper something dirty in their ear. Getting in close is super sexy, Shield says. [6] One way to get close and raise the tension is by whispering something private in their ear . If things are going well, place your hand on their shoulder, put your mouth right next to their ear, and say something like:
    • “How about we get out of here? Want to go to my place?”
    • “You’re the most gorgeous person in this room.”
    • “I wish I could tell you what I want to do to you right now.”
  6. 6
    Send them a spicy text. If you’re not with them in person, you can give them something to enjoy even while you’re apart. Sending them a spicy text gives them something to look forward to and ignites their imagination. It can be a compliment, a risque photo, or even just dirty talk. Just make sure that they’re cool with receiving that sort of text, first—you never know who might catch a glimpse of their phone.
  7. 7
    Give them a hands-free striptease. It’s all in the name: strip tease . You don’t have to get physical to take off your clothes and give them a show . You also don’t have to be a professional dancer. Just dress in layers, then ask them to sit somewhere comfortable. Put on some slow, sensual music, then slowly disrobe in front of them, swaying to the music and making eye contact now and then.
    • Stand a little ways away, or get up close, whatever you’re comfortable with.
  8. 8
    Wear a pleasant perfume or light some candles to draw them in. It’s all about engaging their senses, even the unexpected ones. Devlin recommends lighting some candles to set the mood. [7] Or, put on a few sprays of a flirty perfume to really get them going. Go for something soft and not too overbearing, like floral or woody scents.
  9. 9
    Play spicy Truth or Dare. Shield tells us that “asking a revealing question” can really add to the sexual tension. [8] The best way to do this is with a game of truth or dare, when tricky questions are expected. Suggest you play a game of spicy Truth or Dare , then, when it’s your turn, ask them one of these questions:
    • What’s your favorite place to be kissed?
    • Have you ever had sex on a first date?
    • What’s the sexiest song you know?
  10. 10
    Role play, or switch roles, to spice up the bedroom. Role play is when you pretend to be a character in the bedroom, like a mailman delivering mail or a cop at a traffic stop. It helps you explore power dynamics. Devlin also recommends trying BDSM to explore those roles and dynamics, if you’re comfortable. [9] Being dominant or submissive, especially when you’re not usually, can be a huge turn-on!
    • Of course, make sure to have a safe word to say if you get uncomfortable with where the roleplay is headed.
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Section 3 of 4:

Physical Teasing Techniques & Ideas

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  1. Never underestimate the power of physical touch! All it takes is a hand on the shoulder, or a firm handshake that lasts a little longer than usual. If you’re super familiar with someone, Shield suggests running your hand through their hair. [10] Other gentle, seductive touches include:
    • Placing your hand on their arm or thigh.
    • Wrapping your arm around their shoulders.
    • Caressing their chin or jaw.
    • Taking their hand and examining it closely, like you’re super interested.
  2. 2
    Trail your hand toward their sensitive spots. Devlin reminds us of the power of touch. Everyone craves it, she says, so giving it to someone is a powerful way to get closer. [11] You can really up the seduction, though, by choosing where you touch carefully. For example, start by cupping their chin, then run your hand down their neck, chest, and belly to their thighs.
    • Of course, make sure you have permission! Say, “Is this okay?” as you work your way lower.
  3. 3
    Give them a deep, long kiss. There’s really nothing as thrilling and enticing as giving a good, deep kiss . Relationship coach Maya Diamond, MA, says that the key to a great kiss is to “tune in and attune to the other person while you're kissing them to really feel them so that there's a feeling of connection.” She also says to open your mouth, use your tongue, and angle your head so that you’re comfortable. [12]
    • Most of all, do what feels right! The only bad kiss is one where you’re too aware of things and start to feel awkward.
  4. 4
    Move your kisses down low. Once you’ve crossed the kiss barrier, it’s time to put those kisses to work on other parts of the body. When you’re done doing mouth kisses, start kissing their neck, then their shoulders, chest, and belly. Work your way down to the thighs and legs, then back up. The slower you go and the longer you take, the more wild you’ll drive them.
  5. 5
    Give them a sensual massage. Devlin says that a massage is another great way to get closer to someone. It’s sexy, pleasurable, and shows them how much you care. [13] Ask them to lie down, or just to relax in a chair. Start by squeezing their shoulders, then kneading their back.
    • To make it sexier , ask them if they want to undress, and get undressed yourself.
  6. 6
    Take a steamy shower together. The shower is a great place to fool around, as long as you take care not to slip. Strip in front of them and invite them to wash up together . Get a handful of soap and get lathering—yourself and each other. Feel free to get as spicy in there as you like, or move things to the bedroom as soon as things heat up.
    • It’s best just to fool around a little in there, for your safety. Don’t try anything too physical or tricky!
  7. 7
    Let them undress you. What’s better than a striptease? A striptease where they’re in control. Pull them into a bedroom or wherever you’re comfortable, take their hands, and ask them to undress you. Chances are, they won’t waste any time! And if you’re lucky, they’ll let you undress them, too.
  8. 8
    Put their hands where you want them. Licensed relationship therapist Alysha Jeney, MA, LMFT, says that people, men especially, want to feel wanted. [14] You can easily make someone feel wanted just by taking their hands and putting them on your body. You might let them hold your own hand, your arm, your thigh, or even somewhere more sensitive and private. It’s a physical, hands-on way to tell them that you just can’t wait for them to touch you.
  9. 9
    Sit on their lap to drop powerful hints. There’s nothing more suggestive and cheeky than sitting on someone’s lap, especially when they’re a man. It’s a playful way to show them that you want to be physical and have fun without straight-up taking your clothes off. When you sit on their lap, throw your arms around their neck, kiss them, or caress them gently to get them started in the right direction.
  10. 10
    Feed them something delicious. Studies show that sex and food share space in your brain, and that eating can be a huge turn-on. [15] Consider cooking your partner’s favorite meal to show them your affection. Or, bring some sexy foods to the bedroom and take turns feeding each other chocolate-covered strawberries or something decadent like a mousse.
  11. 11
    Tie them up. Devlin says that tying someone up in an erotic way can be a great outlet for many different fantasies, as long as you stay safe and don’t tie them up too tightly! [16] Being tied up is a super vulnerable position, and a huge turn-on for many people. Check out our guide on tying up your lover to learn all the basic knots and materials you’ll need.
    • With bondage, it’s important to start small and work your way up, depending on what you and your partner are comfortable with.
  12. 12
    Use soft textures to engage their senses. Interesting, exciting textures can be a turn-on. Science says so! [17] Get physical and start titillating your partner by playing around with textures. Put silk sheets on your bed, wear soft or lacey lingerie, cuddle inside a fuzzy blanket. However, you can introduce interesting touches will help you bond and play together.
  13. 13
    Mix things up with warm and cool temperatures. Just like textures, temperatures can also mix things up and excite your partner. Tease them with an ice cube trailed along their spine while you caress them, or breathe a hot breath on the back of their neck. It’ll make them tingle and squirm in the best way!
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Section 4 of 4:

Rules for Teasing

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  1. Teasing is only fun if the other person is actually enjoying it. Otherwise, you’re probably just turning them off. If they’re smiling, laughing, and responding well, that’s you’re green light. But if they seem annoyed or close down, stop what you’re doing, apologize, and switch tactics. [18]
    • Also, only tease someone you know. It’s not a good look to tease strangers with spicy games and tips like these.
  2. 2
    Ask their permission before you touch them. Consent is a must. Before you touch anyone or get intimate with them at all, even just with words, check the vibe and ask permission. All you need to do is say, “Are you comfortable?” [19] Remember that they can change their mind at any point, and so can you.
  3. 3
    Be prepared to get teased back. Teasing is a two-way street! At least, good teasing is, if you ask us. Be prepared to get as good as you give. That’s part of the fun! If you’re the only person allowed to do any teasing, you might turn off your partner or appear selfish, unless that’s what y’all are into. In which case, tease away!
  4. 4
    Have a plan and follow through. If you’re going to tease someone, you should know where things are headed. It’s not cool to sexily tease someone you don’t intend to get sexy with (unless that’s part of the agreement). If you start teasing someone, understand where things are headed and make sure you’re comfortable with that.
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      References

      1. ↑ https://www.berkeleywellbeing.com/mirroring.html
      2. ↑ Joshua Pompey. Flirting Expert. Expert Interview
      3. ↑ Shelby Devlin, MA. Sex & Intimacy Coach. Expert Interview
      4. ↑ Shelby Devlin, MA. Sex & Intimacy Coach. Expert Interview
      5. ↑ Lisa Shield. Dating Coach. Expert Interview
      6. ↑ Lisa Shield. Dating Coach. Expert Interview
      7. ↑ Shelby Devlin, MA. Sex & Intimacy Coach. Expert Interview
      8. ↑ Lisa Shield. Dating Coach. Expert Interview
      9. ↑ Shelby Devlin, MA. Sex & Intimacy Coach. Expert Interview
      1. ↑ Lisa Shield. Dating Coach. Expert Interview
      2. ↑ Shelby Devlin, MA. Sex & Intimacy Coach. Expert Interview
      3. ↑ Maya Diamond, MA. Relationship Coach. Expert Interview
      4. ↑ Shelby Devlin, MA. Sex & Intimacy Coach. Expert Interview
      5. ↑ Alysha Jeney, MA, LMFT. Licensed Relationship Therapist. Expert Interview
      6. ↑ https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4707391/
      7. ↑ Shelby Devlin, MA. Sex & Intimacy Coach. Expert Interview
      8. ↑ https://www.smsna.org/patients/did-you-know/what-is-sensate-focus-and-how-does-it-work
      9. ↑ https://rainn.org/share-the-facts/consent-101-respect-boundaries-and-building-trust/
      10. ↑ https://rainn.org/share-the-facts/consent-101-respect-boundaries-and-building-trust/

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