How to Tell if a Guy Views You as Someone Special

PDF download Download Article
27 signs that he might be falling for you
PDF download Download Article

If you’ve recently started dating a guy, it's common to wonder if he thinks the relationship is casual or serious. We interviewed leadership and relationship coach Zachary Pontrello to find out how to tell if you’re special to him, and we'll share both the subtle and obvious signs. Read on to solve the mystery and find out what he really thinks, in case he doesn't say it directly.

Things You Should Know

  • If a guy thinks you’re special, he’ll want to know everything about you. He’ll ask you open-ended questions and remember all the details.
  • He’ll invite you to events, talk about you to his friends, and call or text you to stay in touch when you’re apart.
  • He’ll value your opinion, respect you, and ask you for advice. He'll support you, be there for you, and help you when you need it.
1

He prioritizes spending time with you.

PDF download Download Article
  1. You can be assured he'll dedicate his free time to you. If he loves spending time with you and prioritizes you over his other interests, he sees you as a special person in his life. [1]
    2. Advertisement
2

He invites you to events.

PDF download Download Article
  1. If you’re special to him, you’re the only person he’d even think to ask. It doesn’t matter where you are or what you’re doing as long as you’re together. [2]
    • However, while being including in his life events is a good sign, make sure he's showing you his commitment in other ways as well (e.g., him making time for and prioritizing you).
    • Reader Poll: We asked 541 wikiHow readers and only 13% thought that the strongest sign of a guy liking you is him inviting you into his plans . [Take Poll]
3

He values your opinion.

PDF download Download Article
  1. If he has a problem, he’ll ask you how to solve it. If he needs movie recommendations, he’ll come to you. He’ll make you feel valued by listening to and appreciating your thoughts. [3]
    2. Advertisement
4

He shares his feelings with you.

PDF download Download Article
  1. Whether they’re good or bad, your guy will lean on you for emotional support. He trusts you with his innermost thoughts and feels safe being vulnerable with you. [4]
5

He supports you during hard times.

PDF download Download Article
  1. Whether that’s letting you vent about your problems or offering advice, he wants to make sure you’re safe, happy, and cared for. [5]
    2. Advertisement
6

He surprises you.

PDF download Download Article
  1. When he sees you as someone special, he’ll want to show you how he feels. He may surprise you with your favorite coffee or write you a love letter just to show you he cares. He wants you to see how much he appreciates having you in his life. [6]
7

He talks about your future together.

PDF download Download Article
  1. He includes you in upcoming events without even having to ask because, in his mind, he’s already envisioning you by his side. He might even bring up marriage and children. Regardless, he’s definitely in it for the long run. [7]
    2. Advertisement
8

He shows genuine interest in your life.

PDF download Download Article
  1. He wants to know all your likes and dislikes, and he’ll ask about that promotion he knows you’re hoping to get. He’s happy when you’re happy, and he’ll cheer you on in your achievements. [8]
    • Leadership and relationship coach Zachary Pontrello told us "spend a little bit of time every day together, practicing engaged conversation....completely focus on each other...just listening and being with each other" is a great way to build an emotional connection.
9

He tells his friends about you.

PDF download Download Article
  1. When you meet his friends for the first time, they may ask you about things you don’t expect, like how you like your new apartment or job. This is because your guy just can’t stop talking about you and how much he likes you. His friends probably know everything about you, and his family might, too. When you’re special to him, he’ll want you to get to know all the other important people in his life. [9]
    2. Advertisement
10

He treats you with respect.

PDF download Download Article
  1. You know that you can express yourself honestly when you’re with him. He might want to spend all his time with you, but he understands you’re your own person and you need your space. When he respects you and your time, he wants to keep you in his life. [10]
11

He communicates openly.

PDF download Download Article
  1. When you have a conflict, he’s willing to talk it out. He’ll listen to your perspective and try to understand where you’re coming from, and he knows you’ll do the same for him. He’s willing to do the work to keep you in his life. [11]
    2. Advertisement
12

He goes out of his way for you.

PDF download Download Article
  1. He wants you to feel safe and valued. He may come over late at night just because you heard a strange noise or he’ll drive across town so you don’t have to walk home at night. No favor will be too big when you’re special to him. [12]
13

He learns your love language.

PDF download Download Article
  1. Don’t be surprised if he adjusts the way he shows his affection. Depending on your love language, he may spend more quality time with you or perform small acts of service. He could show you physical affection or verbally tell you how much you mean to him. Or, he may shower you with gifts to show he cares. He wants you to understand just how much you mean to him. [13]
    2. Advertisement
14

You brighten his day.

PDF download Download Article
  1. He loves to receive compliments from you, and nothing makes him feel better than seeing your smile. He may go out of his way to do things he knows make you happy, even if they’re not something he’d normally enjoy. Seeing you happy is worth it. [14]
15

He stays in touch.

PDF download Download Article
  1. When you’re special to him, he’s not going to play games. He’ll be direct and show you he wants to be with you. He’ll call or text you and make plans to see you again soon.
    2. Advertisement
16

He asks you open-ended questions.

PDF download Download Article
  1. By asking questions and actively listening to your answers, he’s letting you know he wants to understand you on a deeper level. He wants to know what makes you you. He already thinks you’re special, and now he wants to know all your unique traits. [15]
    • Leadership and relationship coach Zachary Pontrello said "removing your devices, taking your partner's hand, looking them in the eye, and genuinely checking how they're doing is a good way to emotionally connect."
17

He gets nervous around you.

PDF download Download Article
  1. He might get shy or maybe he’ll talk too much. If he acts differently around you than with other people, this shows he cares what you think. He’s so focused on making a good impression that he just gets too nervous to focus.
    2. Advertisement
18

He makes a lot of eye contact.

PDF download Download Article
  1. You may find he makes eye contact with you more often than others, and that he holds your gaze for a longer period of time. If you catch him stealing glances at you, know he’s interested in you. [16]
19

He keeps the conversation going.

PDF download Download Article
  1. He’ll quickly find a new topic when there’s a lull in a conversation, or suggest another activity when your time together is about to end. He wants to spend time with you, and he’ll find any excuse to talk to you. [17]
    2. Advertisement
20

He tells you good news before anyone else.

PDF download Download Article
  1. When he receives good news, you’ll be the first one to know. He knows you understand what’s important to him and will always support him in his endeavors. [18]
21

He touches you for no reason.

PDF download Download Article
  1. He may wrap his arm around you or playfully hit you on the arm. You may notice he stands closer to you than anyone else. If it seems like he can’t keep his hands off of you, he probably thinks you’re pretty special. [19]
    2. Advertisement
22

He offers to help you.

PDF download Download Article
  1. He’ll often help you with small tasks throughout the day, like cooking and cleaning. If there’s something you can’t do on your own, he’ll be the first in line to assist you. When you’re special to him, he wants you to know you can always rely on him. [20]
23

He seems jealous of other guys.

PDF download Download Article
  1. Even if your feelings for the other men are purely platonic, he won’t want you to talk about them. Though he may not say it aloud, he wants to keep you all to himself. [21]
    • Remember, there’s a difference between healthy jealousy and being controlling. Your partner should never make you feel like you can’t see your friends or that you should only ever be with them. Practice creating healthy boundaries by being vulnerable and communicating your concerns to your partner.
    2. Advertisement
24

He doesn’t talk about other love interests.

PDF download Download Article
  1. If you’re unsure of your guy’s feelings toward you, ask him about his past relationships. He might tense up and try to evade the question. He also won’t talk about any other potential partners because you’re the only one he’s interested in. [22]
25

He buys you gifts.

PDF download Download Article
  1. He’ll often bring you gifts just because he was thinking of you. You’re on his mind even when you’re not around, showing just how special you are in his eyes. [23]
    2. Advertisement
26

He misses you when you’re apart.

PDF download Download Article
  1. He’ll probably text or call you just to check in and see how you’re doing. He understands that having time apart is healthy, but you can bet he’s counting the hours until he can see you again. [24]
    • According to leadership and relationship coach Zachary Pontrello, doing something as simple as sending an “I miss you” text is a great way to show someone they’re important to you.
27

He loves your weird side.

PDF download Download Article
  1. You’re not afraid to show him your dorky interests because you know he’ll find them endearing. He makes you feel comfortable, and you know you’ll never be embarrassed to show him your true self. [25]
    2. Advertisement

Expert Q&A

Ask a Question
200 characters left
Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered.
Submit
      Advertisement

      Tips

      Submit a Tip
      All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being published
      Name
      Please provide your name and last initial
      Submit
      Thanks for submitting a tip for review!

      You Might Also Like

      130+ Sexy, Sweet, & Seductive Messages for Him
      Signs a Woman is Sexually Attracted to You
      How to
      Tell Her She's Sexy: Examples, Variations, & More
      How to
      Be Sexually Attractive: What to Do, What to Say, and More
      Does This Guy Want Me Sexually? Look Out for These Telltale Signs:
      Is He in Lust or in Love? 15 Ways to Tell the Difference
      What Does an Upside-Down Pineapple Mean?
      Unmistakable Signs He Doesn't Want You Sexually (& How to Deal with It)
      What Is Sexual Hugging?
      130 Best Pick-Up Lines to Use on Guys for Flirting
      How to
      Set Up a Romantic Bedroom for Him
      What Peacocking Means & How Women Do It
      Advertisement

      Expert Interview

      Thanks for reading our article! If you’d like to learn more about relationships, check out our in-depth interview with Zach Pontrello .

      References

      1. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/liking-the-child-you-love/201607/seven-signs-hes-really-in-love-with-you
      2. ↑ https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/love/want-to-know-how-he-feels-signs-a-man-is-falling-in-love/
      3. ↑ https://psychcentral.com/relationships/intimate-relationship-tips#how-to-build-an-intimate-relationship
      4. ↑ https://psychcentral.com/relationships/intimate-relationship-tips#how-to-build-an-intimate-relationship
      5. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/meet-catch-and-keep/201706/6-sure-signs-its-love
      6. ↑ https://psychcentral.com/relationships/intimate-relationship-tips#how-to-build-an-intimate-relationship
      7. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/liking-the-child-you-love/201607/seven-signs-hes-really-in-love-with-you
      8. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/liking-the-child-you-love/201607/seven-signs-hes-really-in-love-with-you
      9. ↑ https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/love/want-to-know-how-he-feels-signs-a-man-is-falling-in-love/
      1. ↑ https://psychcentral.com/blog/emotional-security-in-relationships#signs-of-emotional-security
      2. ↑ https://psychcentral.com/blog/emotional-security-in-relationships#signs-of-emotional-security
      3. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/liking-the-child-you-love/201607/seven-signs-hes-really-in-love-with-you
      4. ↑ https://www.simplypsychology.org/five-love-languages.html
      5. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/liking-the-child-you-love/201607/seven-signs-hes-really-in-love-with-you
      6. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/moral-landscapes/201410/ten-signs-love
      7. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/meet-catch-and-keep/201706/6-sure-signs-its-love
      8. ↑ https://loveconnection.org/signs-he-sees-you-as-someone-special/
      9. ↑ https://psychcentral.com/relationships/intimate-relationship-tips#how-to-build-an-intimate-relationship
      10. ↑ https://loveconnection.org/signs-he-sees-you-as-someone-special/
      11. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/meet-catch-and-keep/201706/6-sure-signs-its-love
      12. ↑ https://loveconnection.org/signs-he-sees-you-as-someone-special/
      13. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/meet-catch-and-keep/201706/6-sure-signs-its-love
      14. ↑ https://loveconnection.org/signs-he-sees-you-as-someone-special/
      15. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/liking-the-child-you-love/201607/seven-signs-hes-really-in-love-with-you
      16. ↑ https://psychcentral.com/blog/emotional-security-in-relationships#signs-of-emotional-security

      About This Article

      Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 17,447 times.

      Did this article help you?

      Advertisement