Shutting down a conversation If someone has made a claim that is unfounded, shut them down with these one-liners. “Let me check my conversation receipt… Nope, I didn’t buy any of this BS today.” “Is your drama going to have an intermission soon? I have to go.” Diffusing an insult Use these one-liners to shut down someone who has just insulted you. “Pardon? I didn’t quite catch that…” (having to repeat their insult will make it less effective) “Amazing, you and I have so much in common!” “Still clinging to that one, huh? Try to be more original…” More insulting comebacks These one-liners might be considered far more offensive depending on the situation and who you’re speaking to, so speak with caution! “If you had a brain you’d take it out and play with it.” “I’d love to give you a nasty look, but it appears you already have one.” Funny comebacks Use these in a joking manner if you know the other person’s sense of humor and don’t want to necessarily offend them. “How did you get here? Did someone leave your cage open?” “You should really come with a warning label.” Sarcastic comebacks Sarcastic one-liners come in handy when someone is being particularly annoying. And, if you’re skilled in the art (timing and tone) of sarcasm, it will go right over their head! “No, keep talking. I always yawn when I’m interested.” “Wow, you’re just bursting with interesting facts today.” Nonverbal comebacks Sometimes another’s words are so groundless, insulting, and ridiculous, they don’t even deserve an audible response. Let them sit with their words and use these dismissive gestures to express your distaste. * A raised eyebrow * A smirk followed by turning away from them (and lingering before walking away) * A dramatic eye roll * A dramatic yawn and glance at your watch (or phone)