1. Anything that has happened to you recently is fair game—just keep it short and sweet. If her eyes start wandering or she looks at her watch/phone like she has somewhere else to be, you need to start wrapping things up. 1. Joke about something in the immediate vicinity. Nothing too mean-spirited or else she’ll think you’re a jerk, but you’re allowed to comment on anything you think she’d find funny. 1. Self-deprecation rarely fails. You could say something about how you’ve been nervous to come talk to her because you’re a giant loser (this combines with flattery for an even greater chance of success) or about how badly you did on a recent history quiz. If she has any basic human compassion, she’ll talk to you for at least a minute or two. 1. Try a pickup line. It’s definitely a hit-or-miss approach, but if she laughs then at least you know she’ll remember you! A couple of appropriately cheesy examples: 1. “Do you have a map? Because I’m getting lost in your eyes.” 2. “I seem to have lost my phone number, can I have yours?” 3. “Are you a Boy Scout? You’re tying my heart in knots.” 4. “Sorry, were you talking to me? ...Well, why not start?” 5. “Hopefully you know CPR because you’re taking my breath away!” 1. Last but not least, there’s always a plain old knock-knock joke or pun to try and make an impression. Here are some of those to tickle her funny bone: 1. “What did the girl mushroom say to the boy mushroom? You’re a real fungi.” 2. “Wanna know how Moses makes his tea? Hebrews it.” 3. “How do you get a pig to a hospital? In a hambulance.” 4. “I was wondering why the frisbee was getting bigger, and then it hit me.” 5. “Did you hear about the guy who lost his whole left side in a car accident? Yeah, he’s all right now.”