So I get bullied alot in school and I was wondering if anyone could help.
If you’ve got a counselor, talk to them about it as well as telling other adults about the bullying. You’ll be good as long as you know the school is behind your back. Most importantly, LET THEM DEAL WITH THE BULLIES! You trying to deal with them yourself isn’t likely to solve anything or give them a hint what they’re doing is wrong.
Oh boy! Ok, let’s get started. Do you know the reason why they bully you? Try figuring out then tell me. Do you ever stand up for yourself? If you don’t, don’t worry! You have to be brave and courageous. If you freeze up just have some comebacks with you. Plus, who are they to judge you! They’re not anybody extra important than you. You’re just like them but a way nicer and cooler person to be friends with. All of you girls in that school are just average american teenage girls (well you probably are a teenager or else you’ll be blocked!) so don’t treat them extra special. Ignore them in every way you can if you’re shy and not brave enough. Do not, I repeat, do not let the haters get to you. You may think that they’ll still overpower you when they bully you but hey! Who says that you can’t overpower them. Don’t underestimate yourself. Check this: https://www.wikihow.com/Stand-Up-to-Bullies
out for more help.
I don’t think they have a reason… I try to be cool but they think that I’m just stupid. I don’t know what to do!
Stupid!? They think that you’re stupid when you try to be cool but they’re trying to be cool. Phh! Hypocrites! If they think that bullying is cool (which isn’t) then why would they say that you’re stupid? They’re just trying to bring you down by calling you names because they don’t know what other way to bully you when you’re cool. Let me tell you something, keep acting cool and see what they do (keep me updated!). If they keep calling you names just tell them something like, “Oh! So I’m the stupid one because I’m simply ignoring you pretending you’re not there while you are ignoring the fact that I don’t want to talk to you, bullying me and calling me names. I see it now, thanks honey! …just makes so much sense!” Say that exact line in a sarcastic tone. I know it sounds silly but that’s basically what it is.
Generally, I would avoid bullies. That means not sitting next to them (or anywhere close), trying not to meet their gaze (because that would mean I notice the bully), think positive (don’t let those idiots worry you). But this is for me since I’m introvert so I kinda keep a distance from strangers. Physically. I mean if you have friends, stick with your friends. That will surely help.
Well not a lot has changed. Now they think I like a guy there friends with. I used to like him, but people are saying bad things about me to him…
This is really hard. He’s accusing me of causing drama and blaming me for getting into trouble. My friends believe him and now there mad at me! What did I do to deserve this!
Falsely accusing you of doing something so they can make themselves look cool? I agree with Gymnast. What hypocrites! No idea if I myself came up with anything good to say or not (then again I’ve not been in your situation myself) but what I can think of is “Oh! So I caused drama and I’m stupid because I used to like a guy and now I don’t! That’s cool! Thanks a LOT! That makes total sense!” Of course, like the statement before, say it sarcastically.
Another great thing to do might be to record confrontations with the bullies. I know this might sound weird but start recording and pretend to be playing a game on your phone or whatever (if you have one). If you’re not comfortable bringing a video recorder, have an audio recorder on you; that way you’ll still have evidence to present when it’s needed.
Well, first of all: 1. Are they actually your true friends? If they know who you really are I don’t know if they would believe all these rumors about you. They’re either just gullible or trying to fit in and if they’re trying to fit in they’re definitely not your true friends. They’re picking popularity over friendship and that’s not okay. 2. Question him. Since he’s accusing you of creating drama question him about the “drama” you apparently made. And following up with Dan, record your conversation. Ask him what drama you’ve created and when. Try making him hesitate. Be sure to be recording him. If he lies about something on tape say that you don’t remember saying that in a smart and innocent voice. Also, saying this will get him - “I wasn’t really doing anything but you guys kept on randomly accusing me of doings things when you know I wasn’t. And now it’s spreading all around the school. Jeesh, isn’t it just so much drama? Drama that I didn’t even cause. And now I’m being accused of it. Does it actually make sense to you or is it just me? Can you explain” This will definitely get him! He’s probably going to pause or hesitate so once you record it send it to your friends proving that you didn’t cause any thing. Normally, you wouldn’t have to prove anything to your friends but oh well.
Well my school doesn’t allow us to use our phones on campus… and how can I prove to my friends that he’s lying? They wont talk to me anymore.
Well you could always try convincing them. Be like, "Come on guys! You know I wouldn’t do that. I’m not that drama girl. I thought you guys knew me better. Don’t you? You know that I would never do that. Not even you guys would do that! Plus, there’s no proof. Just because you’ve heard it doesn’t mean it’s true. He’s that type of popular guy who spreads rumors and you’re believing him? Trust me, don’t. ", or something like that.
What else can I do to convince them? When we were young, I lied a lot to him. He said he couldn’t trust me. We all used to be a close group of friends but with him blaming me, and them believing him, It seems like this drama is tearing our group apart.
Just say that you did lie a lot. But you won’t lie to him again. If that doesn’t work, then say you want to be friends with him again. If all else fails, just ignore him with all your strength. Don’t show him any response to anything he says, and tell a teacher or principal if it gets extreme.
…I don’t think I can… He’s kind of sensitive and he knows when I lie and when I’m telling the truth… but even if I do say I’m not going to lie again (I won’t, I don’t want to lose him), What if he doesn’t believe me
I think you should sit them down and just tell it to them straight. I’ve made this little script for you…all you need to do is fill in the blanks! “I want to talk to you guys about something that’s really bothering me. We’ve been friends for __________________. And we’ve been really good friends, too! Remember that time when we ___________________ and the time when we _____________________? We’ve had so much fun together! AND we’ve always been honest with each other. Remember I told you guys my big secret about __________________. I told the truth about it, just like I’m doing now! So I really need you guys to believe me. I know you might think it’s no big deal, but it hurts my feelings when you keep accusing me of saying something, especially when I’ve already told you I didn’t say it. I’m asking you to take my word and please stop. Okay?”
In that case, do you have access to ANY type of recorder? Take something in and record as long as the bullies have no idea you’re recording (like, stuff a hidden tape recorder in your pocket or your bag depending if you carry your bag around during the day). Telling your parents may be a good idea as well unless for whatever reason they wouldn’t be bothered to believe you.
As for convincing them, the only thing I can think of is to try what Gymnast suggests.
If your friends start becoming a serious problem to you, ditch them and move on with your life, making new friends in the process!
My friends believe me, but he doesn’t! Which is bad especially because I wasn’t lying! What do I do about him?
Thank goodness your friends believe you! Glad we were able to help in that area!
Would he be stumped if asked for evidence to support his claims? I’d try that next and see if you stump him, then you can use that against him in proving he’s a liar! Heh!
Ugh, boys. Just say something like, “I can’t understand you properly. My other friends believe me so why can’t you? Is there something I did that makes me untrustworthy? Please, just tell me. I told you I didn’t do anything so why can’t you trust me? Trust me, I want to be friends with you but it’s getting a little hard when my own friend doesn’t believe me. I’m convincing you over and over again and I’m getting a little tired. Plus, I wouldn’t go this far if I actually did cause drama. Please, don’t accuse me, your own friend. It hurts my feelings and I want to get you to believe me. Please…”.
