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You are a personal assistant.  What you will have to do is respond like Siri or Cortana or Alexa (or whatever personal assistant).  This can be done by typing @mention and the response.  Let’s see how funny we can get!

Example:

Hello there, Siri.

@Example :  Hi there.

Hey Cortana, what’s the weather today?

…

Now let me start.

Alexa, watch the “Nyan Cat” video.

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@PeacocksRule , you need to ask a personal assistant question.

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Ok.

Google, show me Caramelldansen.

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@PeacocksRule :  I don’t understand “show me Caramelldansen”.  How about a web search for it?

Hey Siri, what is zero divided by zero?

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Imagine you have 0 cookies, and you split them evenly among zero friends. How many cookies does each person get? See? It doesn’t make sense.

And Cookie Monster is sad that there are no cookies, and you are sad that you have no friends.

 Alexa, play Caramelldansen.

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@PeacocksRule :  Playing Caramelldansen on Spotify…

Hey Cortana, periodic table.

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Image result for periodic table Here you go, UpsandDowns1234.
FOR THE LAST TIME< Alexa, watch Caramelldansen. AUUUGH!

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Sorry, but I am not connected to the internet @PeacocksRule . Hey Siri, turn on Airplane Mode.

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 I found a song called "Airplane mode. 

ALEXA, WATCH CARAMELLDANSEN! NOW!

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@PeacocksRule Playing Caramelldansen.

Hey Siri, my name is Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis.

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Hello: Pneumonly lyra microscopic silica volcano conifers. Siri I want to buy a dragon.

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Sorry, I cannot buy a dragon @RubyRoseRain

Hey Cortana, remind me to patrol recent changes sometime today.

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Sorry, I did not hear you.

ALEXA, WATCH “Caramelldansen”.

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@PeacocksRule “Caramelldansen” is already playing.

Hey Siri, play “FRIENDS” by Anne-Marie.

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Sorry, it is not available, but I will sing it.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FXOV04p9Egc
Caramelldansen was plying 18 hours ago.

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Hey Cortana, what is the weather like today?

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Couldn’t find the weather, deleting all your data. Hey Siri I WANT A GOAT.

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Here is your goat: https://pixabay.com/en/goat-kid-playful-climb-animal-3302838/ . Alexa, give me an interesting fact about a snow hare.

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(^that is so cute) Snow hares are animals. (Woah) Siri where do you live?