Love (do we have a future together?)

If you're wondering whether you and your boyfriend have a future together, try asking yourself these questions:

• Do we respect and trust one another?
• Do we share similar values and, if relevant, religious beliefs?
• Can I count on them? Are they reliable?
• Are we best friends?
• Do we share similar goals and visions for the future?
• Do we encourage one another's personal growth?
• Do we accept and love one another as we are, without trying to change one another?

If you said "no" to any of these questions, it doesn't necessarily mean your relationship is doomed, but you (and potentially your boyfriend) may want to take some time to reflect on how the relationship is going and how you can work on it to make it even stronger, with real long-term potential.

Compatibility involves attraction and sexual chemistry, but these both die down after a few years, and then you're left with friendship and attachment. If you don't have friendship in the beginning, which over time is strengthened through experience, then the relationship generally will fade out. If you want a relationship to last, work on building your friendship: friendship takes time, but it also takes a lot of mutual respect and emotional regulation.