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Being attractive comes more from your personality than from your appearance, and demonstrating an attractive personality is key to making friends and having lasting relationships. To have an attractive personality, cultivate the ability to communicate naturally, develop a sense of humor, and build a confident disposition. These traits give you the ability to inspire and fascinate others, making others more drawn to you as a result.
Top Traits of an Attractive Personality
- Humor
- Emotional intelligence
- Respect
- Confidence
- Optimism
- Empathy
- Humility
Steps
Part 1
Part 1 of 3:
Communication
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Listen to others. Listening is a trait that is often forgotten about in today's society. Instead of responding to a text, opening an email, or thinking about your next meal, pay attention to what the other person is saying. Show them you're listening and interested by commenting on the story or asking questions. [1] X Expert Source Eddy Baller
Dating Coach Expert Interview. 7 February 2020. -
Speak sincerely. No one likes to be duped. Tell people the truth. If you can't commit to something, it's better to be honest about it than to have to tell them last minute that you can't make it. When people ask for your opinion, you should be honest.
- There is a difference between honest and rude opinions. For instance, if you don't like your friend's shirt and they ask you about it, respond with, “I really like you in blue instead,” rather than, “I hate it, it's ugly.”
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Know “how” vs “what.” How you say things is arguably more important than what you say. If you try to give someone a genuine compliment, but they think you say it with a sarcastic undertone, your compliment won't mean a thing. Be aware of the way you speak. If you notice that people often take things you say the wrong way, there's a good chance you can change how you speak. Ask your friends to make you aware of the way you're coming across.
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Help others communicate. Get a bunch of people together for a fun get together. It can be as simple as a gathering at the park, or as extravagant as an elegant dinner party. Either way, it shows them that you care and want to spread friendship.
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Part 2
Part 2 of 3:
Humor
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Laugh at yourself. If you do something silly, laugh at yourself instead of feeling embarrassed. It shows that you're comfortable in your skin. A sense of humor makes someone more engaging and delightful to be with.
- Remember that there is a time and place for humor. It is a great ice-breaker or stress reliever, but don't ruin a serious conversation with inappropriate jokes.
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Show enthusiasm for everything. Even if something makes you slightly uncomfortable, attack it with a smile on your face, an open mind, and a sense of humor. Not every day is going to be perfect, but being enthusiastic can help you accomplish anything. When you act this way, people will love being around you.
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Make laughing a priority. Laughing at yourself isn't quite enough if you want the most attractive personality. If you see value in making others laugh and keep laughter higher on your priority list, you'll be a happier person. [2] X Research source
- A great way to remind you to laugh more (and to share it with others) is to have daily jokes on your phone or email. Set them for a time of day when you notice yourself start to feel drained.
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Part 3
Part 3 of 3:
Confidence
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Have confidence in how you speak and act. You should always say what you believe in, be willing to take risks, and have the ability to admit your mistake without being worried about what other people will think. Doing this shows that you have self-confidence. [3] X Expert Source Eddy Baller
Dating Coach Expert Interview. 7 February 2020. This helps create an attractive personality because it shows that you're comfortable with yourself and that makes others comfortable around you. [4] X Research source- Asking questions is important when it comes to confidence. The more you know, the more comfortable you'll feel when speaking about things. Never be afraid to ask questions.
- Avoid comparing yourself with other people as well to help get rid of self-doubt. [5]
X
Expert Source
Kirsten Parker, MFA
Mindset & Action Coach Expert Interview. 22 July 2020.
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Have confidence in your body. Dressing appropriately and having good posture show confidence. You don't have to have the “perfect body” to be confident in it. People will be more attracted to you if you dress well, respect yourself, and carry yourself well.
- If you need a little boost, place post-it's around your mirror that remind you of the parts of your body that you love. Focus on these rather than the things that you're self-conscious about. [6] X Research source
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Know the difference between confidence and cockiness. While confidence is endearing, cockiness is very unappetizing. People will turn away from your personality if you're all about yourself. A great way to avoid this is to remind yourself to compliment others. Every day, find 5 people to give compliments to. They can be strangers, co-workers, or friends. Either way, this will help you stay grounded.
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Join the Discussion...
I know "beauty is subjective" but what are some actionable steps I can take to be just generally better-looking/attractive to others? I don't think I'm hideous, but I could be more attractive. Any tips on how to go about this?
Looking and feeling more attractive, in my opinion, is all about having confidence, promoting self-care, and highlighting your best features.
Of course, I believe that this is where color analysis can be helpful because knowing your color palette and what colors look best on you can really help you boost your confidence and enhance your appearance. Even wearing a simple top in your color palette can make your skin tone look super radiant– it can almost give the effect of wearing makeup! Try to curate looks that appear both nice and polished. Choosing flattering styles for your body type is another great way to feel more attractive and feel more confident. Finally, put effort into taking care of yourself! Whether it's different lifestyle habits or cultivating a good skincare routine, putting effort into yourself will not only improve your appearance, it will just make you feel better both inside and out. That's how I would approach it.
I find it really attractive when someone comes across as genuinely happy. People who are full of joy and are loving life are so magnetic. If there's something in your life that brings you joy, lean into it and share it with others. The positivity will draw people to you!
Be Charismatic with this Expert Series
Do you want to be the kind of person who lights up a room? Learn how to attract people to you and be the most charismatic version of yourself with this expert series.
Expert Q&A
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QuestionWhat are some attractive personality traits?Eddy Baller is a Dating Coach and the Owner of a dating consulting and coaching service, Conquer and Win, based in Vancouver, Canada. Coaching since 2011, Eddy specializes in confidence-building, advanced social and communication skills, and building meaningful relationships. He offers in-person, 1:1 coaching for men where they can meet women and get live feedback. Conquer and Win helps men worldwide have the love lives they deserve.Show genuine interest in the other person by listening to them with your full attention when they're speaking.
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Tips
- Exercise and a good diet are a great way to keep energy levels high and confidence in your body.Thanks
- You don't have to be outgoing to have all of these qualities. A shy person can exude these traits just as easily as an outgoing person can.Thanks
- Don't change yourself. Even if people don't agree with everything that you say or do, they'll appreciate that you're true to yourself.Thanks
Tips from our Readers
The advice in this section is based on the lived experiences of wikiHow readers like you. If you have a helpful tip you’d like to share on wikiHow, please submit it in the field below.
- When you get angry at someone, get some alone time to cool off and think about the situation, instead of acting rashly.
- Be realistic, but always try to see the positives and the silver linings in any situation.
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References
- ↑ Eddy Baller. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 7 February 2020.
- ↑ http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/08/29/good-sense-of-humor_n_5731418.html
- ↑ Eddy Baller. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 7 February 2020.
- ↑ https://www.mindtools.com/selfconf.html
- ↑ Kirsten Parker, MFA. Mindset & Action Coach. Expert Interview. 22 July 2020.
- ↑ http://www.womenshealthmag.com/life/boost-body-confidence
About This Article
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- "I fear everything around me. My family is strict. I can't get anything from society, but my family fulfills my priorities. This wikiHow article gives me a way to the future life. It boosts my confidence and makes me brave and comfortable. This section help me to understand society and use it well. " ..." more
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"I fear everything around me. My family is strict. I can't get anything from society, but my family fulfills my priorities. This wikiHow article gives me a way to the future life. It boosts my confidence and makes me brave and comfortable. This section help me to understand society and use it well. "
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