14 Ways to Become a Person Everyone Wants to Know

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You’ve seen them before: the person that everyone wants to know. They’re charming, likable, and all-around a fun person—but how did they get that way? In this article, we’ll tell you exactly how you can shift your body language and your conversation skills to win people over. With these helpful tips, you can make yourself into someone that everyone wants to know.

1

Make eye contact.

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  1. When you talk to people, look them in the eyes and try to hold their gaze. You’d be surprised at how big of a difference this one simple thing makes! [1]
    • Feeling a little awkward about making eye contact right away? Try looking at someone’s forehead instead. It’s not quite the same, but it will get you into the habit without jumping in head first.
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2

Smile at people.

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  1. Plus, they make people feel more comfortable around you. When you’re meeting new people or talking with others, keep a smile on your face as much as you can. [2]
    • Plus, smiling makes you look more approachable, too. When’s the last time you approached a stranger who looked mad or angry? Smiling makes it much more likely that people will strike up conversations with you in the street.
3

Hold your head up and your chin high.

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  1. Stand up straight and roll your shoulders back so you don’t slouch. Having good posture shows that you’re secure with yourself, and it makes you look more approachable , too. [3]
    • Even if you don’t feel like the most confident person in the room, fake it until you make it!
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4

Practice open body language.

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  1. When you cross your arms or face away from others, you’re subconsciously telling them that you don’t want to be bothered. Instead, keep your arms down by your side and face toward people when they’re talking. That way, they understand that you’re happy to be in conversation with them. [4]
    • Open body language also makes you appear more confident, which will draw people toward you.
    • Reader Poll: We asked 782 wikiHow readers about what body language they find irresistible, and only 6% said that they're attracted to people who touch their hair . [Take Poll] So while getting touchy-feely too soon may not be the best strategy, you can still convey open body language with relaxed posture and uncrossed arms.
5

Listen to people when they talk.

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  1. [5] Put away your phone and look people in the eye when they talk. Not only is it polite, but active listening will make the people around you feel like you truly want to get to know them. [6]
    • You can also ask follow up questions to show that you’re listening. Try saying things like, “Interesting, can you tell me more?”
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6

Call people by their name.

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  1. When you meet someone for the first time, try saying it back to them, like, "Hello, Joe, good to meet you." When you see a friend or an acquaintance you don’t know too well, greet them by name to show them they left an impression on you. It will make them feel good, which in turn makes you look good, too. [7]
    • Trouble remembering someone’s name? Remember it by repeating it out loud and then writing it down. [8]
7

Compliment people.

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  1. Everyone likes to hear nice things about themselves! Pick out something you really like about someone, and then let them know. It doesn’t have to be about their physical appearance—compliment their personality or how they act to really make them happy. [9] Just make sure your compliments are sincere so they don’t come off as fake. Great compliments include:
    • “You have the best sense of humor! You always know how to make me laugh.”
    • “Your sense of style is off the charts. I look forward to seeing your outfits every day.”
    • “What a ray of sunshine you are! You really light up a room.”
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8

Connect over common interests.

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  1. When you’re chatting with someone new or you’re talking to a friend, try to see if you two like any of the same things. It could be something you do on the weekends, books you like to read, or even movies you enjoy. The more you have in common, the more you two will have to talk about. [10]
    • Try asking open-ended questions to find out what the other person likes, such as, “What did you get up to last week?” or, “What’s the last movie you saw in theaters?”
9

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  1. If you know a friend had a big exam last week, ask them how it went. If your coworker was up for a promotion, see how the interview process went. People love it when you remember little details about them, and it will make them like you even more. [11]
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10

Be humble about your accomplishments.

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  1. While it’s great if you have accompaniments or awards, try to be humble about them instead of talking about them all the time. If someone asks, you can absolutely talk about what you’ve got going on—otherwise, keep your achievements on the down-low. [12]
11

Keep a positive attitude.

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  1. Complaining tends to push people away from you—unfortunately, it can paint you in a negative light. Try to look on the bright side of things, and keep your head up. You'll be happier, and more people will want to be around you. [13]
    • Plus, being positive is actually better for your mental health, too.
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12

Try new things.

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  1. If you’re constantly open to do new things or try new experiences, people will look forward to being around you. Your fun-loving attitude and your willingness to be uncomfortable will make you a likable person. [14]
    • Plus, stepping outside of your comfort zone will make you a happier person overall!
13

Be your most authentic self.

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  1. Plus, most people appreciate when a person is being honest, even if you have some quirks. As you focus on becoming a person that everyone likes, don’t forget to keep living your most authentic life, too. [15]
    • Try to be as much of an open book as possible. If you’re honest about your thoughts and feelings, people will enjoy talking to you much more.
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14

Practice gratitude.

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  1. When you love your life, it shows the people around you that you're happy and confident, which will draw them in. Try keeping a gratitude journal where you write down 2 to 3 things you’re thankful for every day. [16] You might include things like:
    • “I woke up in time to see the sunrise today.”
    • “The coffee I bought from the cafe down the street tasted amazing.”
    • “I got to talk to my mom on the phone today.”

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      References

      1. ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships-communication/nonverbal-communication.htm
      2. ↑ https://online.uwa.edu/news/benefits-of-smiling-and-laughter/
      3. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/why-bad-looks-good/202102/stretch-success-how-posture-can-improve-self-esteem
      4. ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships-communication/nonverbal-communication.htm
      5. ↑ Elle Monus. Image Consultant. Expert Interview. 7 September 2021.
      6. ↑ https://www.edutopia.org/article/value-active-listening
      7. ↑ https://www.canr.msu.edu/news/using_a_persons_name_in_conversation
      8. ↑ https://www.canr.msu.edu/news/tips_to_remembering_a_persons_name
      9. ↑ https://www.sciencealert.com/here-are-16-psychological-tricks-to-immediately-make-people-like-you-more
      1. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-squeaky-wheel/202009/10-ways-become-more-likable
      2. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-squeaky-wheel/202009/10-ways-become-more-likable
      3. ↑ https://www.counsellingconnection.com/index.php/2019/11/14/the-psychology-of-bragging/
      4. ↑ https://cae.edu.sg/positivity-is-attractive/
      5. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/in-flux/201512/5-benefits-stepping-outside-your-comfort-zone
      6. ↑ Elle Monus. Image Consultant. Expert Interview. 7 September 2021.
      7. ↑ https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/ten_ways_to_become_more_grateful1

      About This Article

      Article Summary X

      To become a person everyone wants to know, use relaxed, approachable body language. Make eye contact and smile when talking to others. Keep your chin up and avoid closed-off postures like crossing your arms over your chest. When other people talk, give them your full attention, listen actively, and ask lots of follow-up questions so they know you value what they have to say. Look for common interests you can connect over and bring up details from previous conversations. Be positive and authentic, but stay humble. And remember to practice gratitude for the good things and people in your life. To learn how to use your body language to attract others to you, keep reading!

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