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How to compliment her without coming across as a creep
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Whether she's your date or a stranger across the room, you can't take your eyes off her—and you want to let her know without coming across as a creep. Well, you've come to the right place! We talked to licensed clinical psychologist Sarah Schewitz and dating coach John Keegan to compile a list of expert-backed compliments that'll help you capture her heart.
Complimenting a Woman's Looks
- "You're really glowing tonight."
- "I think you're a beautiful woman inside and out."
- "You're so strong! I admire your dedication."
- "I'm totally entranced by your smile."
- "You just radiate confidence—it looks good on you!"
Steps
Section 1 of 2:
12 Great Ways to Compliment a Woman
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Tell her she's glowing. Some people just seem to shine, don't they? Tell her she's one of those people. You might say that you don't know what it is exactly, but she just lights up the room. Keegan notes that this can be a great way to approach a woman you don't know, to just walk over and say "you just kind of sparkle and shine and I wanted to introduce myself. It could be that simple." [1] X Expert Source John Keegan
Dating Coach Expert Interview. 5 November 2019. You might also say:- "There's something about you—you just really shine!"
- "I don't know what it is exactly, but you're almost luminescent this evening."
- "You're seriously, like, glowing. Do people tell you that a lot or are you just particularly radiant tonight?"
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Say that she's beautiful. Just keep it wholesome and avoid mentioning a specific part of her body or using a more sexual adjective, such as "hot" or "stunning." You're focusing on the whole picture and letting her know that you enjoy looking at her without being too forward. [2] X Research source Keegan recommends starting with "a validation, [such as] 'you're a really great listener and you're beautiful.'" [3] X Expert Source John Keegan
Dating Coach Expert Interview. 10 June 2021. Here are some more examples:- "I think you're such a beautiful woman—everything about you radiates beauty."
- "You're such a beautiful soul, I can't help but find you attractive."
- "I can't take my eyes off of you—your beauty has captured my complete attention."
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Focus on her skin. Women frequently invest a lot of time into their skincare regimen, so this is a compliment that can help her feel a sense of achievement. And since skincare is something that's within her control, you're effectively applauding her effort. Here are some things you might say:
- "Wow, your face is so dewy and radiant. Your skin looks amazing!"
- "Your skin is so soft. You must have an intense moisturizing routine!"
- "I have to say, your skin is smooth as glass. What's your secret?"
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Appreciate her fitness level. This is one that might not be appropriate in every situation, but it does give you an opportunity to make a pretty physical compliment without it seeming creepy. Essentially, you're praising the effort that she's put into her physical fitness and most women will appreciate that as long as you keep it simple and don't get too weird about it. For example, you might say:
- "You've got incredible tone in your arms. What are your favorite exercises?"
- "One look at your legs tells me you're a runner. What's your best race?"
- "You have some amazing calves. How do you normally strengthen them?"
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Admire her eyes. If you compliment her piercing gaze, she'll feel powerful and adored. This is an especially powerful compliment if you mention it at a surprising moment, such as right after you've finished talking. It sends the message that her eyes are so beautiful, they've taken the thought right out of your head. Keegan recommends this approach if you're trying to slowly get personal with someone you're attracted to: "Get into getting to know them, having them get to know you. And then throw little things out, like 'you have beautiful eyes[.]" [4] X Expert Source John Keegan
Dating Coach Expert Interview. 10 June 2021. He continues that you might also try "just saying you have really soulful eyes, or you have really intelligent eyes." [5] X Expert Source John Keegan
Dating Coach Expert Interview. 29 June 2021. Here are some other things you might try:- “Your eyes are this amazing shade of brown. Sorry, I keep getting lost in them.”
- “Your eyes are seriously intoxicating. I’m having a hard time focusing.”
- “Wow. Before I finish my story, I have to say that your eyes are dazzling.”
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Mention her wonderful smile. No matter how beautiful her smile is, it's likely that it isn't complimented as often as you think. To compliment her smile , just let her know that you love the way she beams at you. If you mention how her smile lights up her face, she'll likely be inspired to smile even more when you're around. Here are some more ideas:
- “You have such a warm smile. I love it.”
- “Your smile is amazing. I feel like I’m in a trance! Has anyone ever told you that before?”
- “Wow, look at that smile. It’s magical!”
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Talk about her infectious laugh. If you want to make this a physical compliment, just emphasize the way she looks when she laughs. Maybe you love the way she tosses her head back or covers her mouth with her hands. Maybe she has a whole-body laugh that emanates from her core. Regardless of what you choose to focus on, when you're talking about her laughing it makes for a refreshing compliment. Here are some examples: [6] X Research source
- “I love how you laugh. You don’t hold back—it’s so amazing.”
- “Your laugh is so cute. It totally puts a smile on my face!”
- “I love the way you throw your head back when you laugh. You look so free.”
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Compliment a specific clothing choice. She probably put time and effort into her fit, so she'll love if you notice. If you see something that seems new, zero in on that—it sometimes feels risky to wear something new for the first time and she'll appreciate the validation. This gives you an opportunity to compliment her body without saying so directly. Schewitz recommends that you "basically compliment her from the neck up, unless you're talking about her clothes, in which case that's fine." [7] X Expert Source Sarah Schewitz, PsyD
Licensed Clinical Psychologist Expert Interview. 15 April 2019.- "Ooh, I'm digging those shoes! Are they new? They look new."
- "The embroidery in that sweater is beautiful and really brings out your eyes."
- "That suit is really giving Zendaya and you are rocking it."
- Reader Poll: We asked 308 wikiHow readers and 52% of them agreed that the best type of compliment to give their girlfriend is one that points out something specific about her outfit . [Take Poll]
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Tie your comment to the color she's wearing. Mentioning a color is a super non-threatening way to slip in a compliment that might touch on the physical without being creepy or going over the line. After all, she chose that color, which likely means she likes it as well and thinks she looks good in it—all you're really doing is agreeing with her. For example, you might say:
- "Oh wow, that light blue headband is the same exact shade as your eyes—that's so cool!"
- "That hot pink jacket is lit. You look so amazing in it."
- "That purple blazer really pops against your skin tone."
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Rave about her style. If you talk about how much you dig the vibe of her clothes and accessories, she'll feel special and understood. Whether she's more of a coquette , cottagecore, edgy alt-girl , or classic old money aesthetic , she'll like that you can read the story her fashion choices are trying to tell. Keegan notes this is a really easy compliment to throw out at the end of a great date, "like, hey, you know, you have great style... you have some great ideas." [8] X Expert Source John Keegan
Dating Coach Expert Interview. 29 June 2021.- "I've gotta say, there's something so amazing about your style. I love the way you put things together."
- "You have such a bold style that's really fun. Are you as fearless as your fashion choices?"
- "It's great how you take trendy pieces and really make them your own—you manage to be cool and be totally you at the same time."
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Say that her confidence shines through. Self-confidence is really attractive, so this is a great way to give her a physical compliment without mentioning her body at all. Plus, telling her that you see her as confident will help her feel strong and empowered, which is great for her overall self-esteem—exactly what a compliment should do. [9] X Research source For example, you might say:
- "You come off as really sure of yourself. I admire how you commit to something once you've made up your mind about it."
- "When you walk in a room, your confidence turns heads."
- "It's so refreshing to talk to someone who has such a strong sense of self. Your confidence just oozes from your pores."
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Let her know that she has great energy. Even though it's not totally specific to her body or appearance, talking about her vibe or her energy is sort of all-encompassing. You're talking about the whole package and how it resonates with you. If you tell her you dig her vibe, you'll really make an impression.
- "I feel like you put out such a positive vibe. You're boosting my energy as we talk."
- "You've got such a naturally playful energy—I love that about you. You're such a blast to talk to."
- "I think you've got this really open, understanding vibe. It's hard to describe, but it's really comfortable to be around."
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References
- ↑ John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 5 November 2019.
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/in-the-name-love/201805/whats-more-important-being-sexy-or-being-beautiful
- ↑ John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 10 June 2021.
- ↑ John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 10 June 2021.
- ↑ John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 29 June 2021.
- ↑ https://au.reachout.com/articles/5-ways-to-give-compliments-that-arent-about-a-persons-looks
- ↑ Sarah Schewitz, PsyD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 15 April 2019.
- ↑ John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 29 June 2021.
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/shyness-is-nice/201809/why-self-confidence-is-more-important-you-think
- ↑ https://embolden.world/the-art-of-the-compliment/
- ↑ https://embolden.world/the-art-of-the-compliment/
- ↑ Sarah Schewitz, PsyD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 15 April 2019.
- ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/relationships/social-connection/setting-healthy-boundaries-in-relationships
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/insights-yet-unseen/202209/give-more-compliments-it-won-t-be-awkward-you-think
- ↑ Sarah Schewitz, PsyD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 15 April 2019.
- ↑ https://embolden.world/the-art-of-the-compliment/
- ↑ Sarah Schewitz, PsyD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 15 April 2019.
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