How to Cope with Nightmares

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No matter what age you are, having nightmares can be an awful and difficult experience, and knowing they aren’t real doesn’t always help. If you experience nightmares regularly or had one recently, there are a few ways you can cope with them and forget your fears.

Method 1
Method 1 of 3:

Grounding Yourself

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  1. When you wake up from a nightmare, chances are you will be in somewhat of a panic. Take the following steps quickly to help you break this panic and start to ground yourself: [1]
    • Sit up quickly after awaking from your nightmare.
    • Sit on the edge of the bed, with your feet on the floor.
    • Focus on your surroundings. Start naming the things in your room.
    • Calmly reassure yourself. Tell yourself you are safe and fully awake.
    • Try to sleep again. If you can't after fifteen minutes, do something relaxing until tired.
  2. While you can reassure your mind that you are awake and safe, it is also important to reassure your senses and body as well. Ground each sense by taking the following steps: [2]
    • Taste. Try eating something strong, like a mint. Avoid sugar as it will affect sleep.
    • Touch. Touch something with a rough texture or cold temperature like an ice cube.
    • Smell. Keep a comforting and strong smell next to your bed such as coffee or cloves.
    • Sound. Choose a comforting sound or listen to gentle music.
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  3. Calm breathing can help lower heart rate and reduce any state of panic or stress that a nightmare can have on you. By following the steps of this technique, you can greatly improve the speed at which you recover after a nightmare: [3]
    • Breathe in through your nose, with mouth closed, and hold for five seconds.
    • Exhale slowly. Mentally think of a word such as “relax” or “calm” as you exhale.
    • Hold for five seconds and then inhale again.
    • Practice this breathing throughout the day, before bed, and after any nightmare.
  4. Right after you wake up from a nightmare, try not to think about what it was you experienced. Sitting in bed dwelling on the nightmare will only increase anxiety, which will make it difficult to fall back asleep, as well as increase the likelihood of another nightmare.
    • Wait until the morning to analyze and examine your nightmares.
    • Get out of bed and ground yourself immediately. Try making a cup of tea and reading a calming book in low, soothing lighting.
    • Reassure yourself that you are safe, check that the doors and windows of your house are locked.
    • Remind yourself that although frightening, the nightmare is over. Picture yourself back in control of your own life. [4]
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Method 2
Method 2 of 3:

Finding the Causes of Your Nightmares

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  1. When you are awake, during the day, write your nightmares down in a journal. Keeping a good record of the details, themes, images, and dialogues of your nightmares will help you examine them and possibly find any causes in your waking life. [5] [6]
  2. Is there anywhere that you feel like you don't have control? Nightmares typically have to do with an area of your life where you don't have control, or didn't in the past. [8] For instance, having nightmares about someone yelling at you or hurting you might be related to a hostile work environment. [9]
  3. Tell anyone you trust about your nightmares. The support of your friends and family can also help bring comfort to you and reduce the likelihood of nightmares occurring. [12]
    • Talking with others about your nightmares can help you recall details and come to better examine your dreams for any links to your waking life.
    • Only speak to people you trust and feel safe describing your nightmares with.
  4. 4
    Look for any causes of your nightmare. Nightmares can be caused by a number of activities and removing or altering these behaviors can put an end to the nightmares. Examine your daily actions and look for anything that might be causing your nightmares, which may include: [13] [14]
    • Extreme stress in your life. Any source of stress in your life can carry over into your dream life and cause nightmares. [15] Look at your daily routine and see if any part of it is overly stressful. Try to improve that situation, making it less stressful, and see if your nightmares are reduced. [16]
    • A traumatic event or PTSD. If you have experienced a traumatic event in the past, this may be responsible for your nightmares. Generally, nightmares stemming from trauma will have elements of that trauma within them and are often repetitive. [17]
    • Stopping or starting a new medication. Talk with your doctor to learn more about any prescriptions you may have been given, or ordered to end, to learn if they might cause nightmares as a side-effect.
    • Abusing alcohol or drugs. Alcohol and drugs can interrupt sleep mechanisms and patterns, resulting in nightmares. Examine your consumption of substances such as these and their possible relation to your nightmares. Speak with your doctor for help ending substance abuse.
  5. If nightmares persist more than once a week or are preventing you from getting good sleep, call your doctor and schedule an appointment. Prepare yourself by expecting the following questions and procedures during your visit. [18]
    • When and how often do your nightmares occur?
    • How well are you sleeping? Do you often awake suddenly and have difficulty returning to sleep?
    • Does the nightmare cause intense fear and anxiety?
    • Have you recently been ill or under a great deal of stress?
    • Which medications are you currently taking? Do you use any drugs or alcohol? How often and how much? Do you use any alternative medicines or therapies?
    • You may be given a physical and a neurological/psychological examination.
  6. This may not be the best approach for people with severe trauma, such as PTSD without professional guidance. But for many, examining dreams through expressive art can help you examine, understand it, and express it enough to let it go. This includes: [19]
    • Expressive art: Painting, sketching, sculpture
    • Music: Composing, music
    • Performing art: movies, dance, theater
    • Creative writing: poems, short story, novel, blog.
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Method 3
Method 3 of 3:

Using Imagery Rehearsal Therapy

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  1. If you have nightmares as a result of trauma or reoccurring nightmares, you may want to employ imagery rehearsal therapy. Imagery rehearsal therapy has been shown to be effective in reducing the frequency of nightmares. [20]
    • Imagery rehearsal therapy involves the active rewriting of your nightmare.
    • Imagery rehearsal therapy has been proven effective and is a simple technique.
    • Talk with your doctor or therapist to learn how imagery rehearsal therapy can work best for you.
  2. Recall your nightmare while you are awake and write it down as if it were a story. Try to capture the narrative of the nightmare and any details you feel are relevant. [21] [22]
    • Don't be afraid to recall your nightmare. Remember why you are revisiting it.
    • Be as honest and accurate as you can in your recollection.
  3. Take charge of your nightmare and rewrite any part of it you want. The main idea here is to transform the negative aspects of your nightmare into positive aspects. By restructuring your nightmare, you eliminate the original mental cause of the nightmare. Try changing the following aspects: [23]
  4. Actively imagine the nightmare during the day, this time with the changes you have made. Rehearsing your nightmare in this way will help tell your mind that the positive new narrative you have crafted is to replace the old nightmare. [26]
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Expert Q&A

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  • Question
    How do you stop nightmare disorder in adults?
    Nicole Moshfegh, PsyD
    Licensed Clinical Psychologist
    Dr. Nicole Moshfegh is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist and Author based in Los Angeles, California. Dr. Moshfegh specializes in multicultural competence and treating patients with mood and anxiety disorders and insomnia. She holds a BA in Psychology and Social Behavior from The University of California, Irvine (UCI), and an MA and Doctor of Psychology (PsyD) from Pepperdine University. Dr. Moshfegh completed her predoctoral internship and postdoctoral fellowship at The University of California, Los Angeles (UCLA). Additionally, she is a member of the American Psychological Association, National Register of Health Service Psychologists, Los Angeles County Psychological Association, and Collaborative Family Healthcare Association. Dr. Moshfegh is also the best-selling author of "The Book of Sleep: 75 Strategies to Relieve Insomnia".
    Nicole Moshfegh, PsyD
    Licensed Clinical Psychologist
    Expert Answer
    Visit a behavioral sleep medicine specialist. They can tailor a treatment program specifically to you, though this may depend on other psychological factors and influences, like PTSD.
    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
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  • Question
    What are the most common bad dreams?
    Evan Parks, PsyD
    Licensed Clinical Psychologist
    Dr. Evan Parks is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist and an Adjunct Assistant Professor at The Michigan State University College of Human Medicine. With over 25 years of experience, he specializes in helping people manage chronic pain through the Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) Approach at Mary Free Bed Rehabilitation Hospital. He also has experience working with others on topics ranging from stress management to mental flexibility. Dr. Parks is also the author of Chronic Pain Rehabilitation: Active Pain Management That Helps You Get Back to the Life You Love. Dr.Parks holds a BA in Theology from Cedarville University, an MA in Counseling Psychology from Western Michigan University, and a PsyD in Clinical Psychology from The Forest Institute of Professional Psychology.
    Evan Parks, PsyD
    Licensed Clinical Psychologist
    Expert Answer
    Some common bad dreams involve being unable to escape, solve a problem, protect ourselves, or protect others we care about.
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  • Question
    Why do I keep having bad dreams?
    Evan Parks, PsyD
    Licensed Clinical Psychologist
    Dr. Evan Parks is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist and an Adjunct Assistant Professor at The Michigan State University College of Human Medicine. With over 25 years of experience, he specializes in helping people manage chronic pain through the Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) Approach at Mary Free Bed Rehabilitation Hospital. He also has experience working with others on topics ranging from stress management to mental flexibility. Dr. Parks is also the author of Chronic Pain Rehabilitation: Active Pain Management That Helps You Get Back to the Life You Love. Dr.Parks holds a BA in Theology from Cedarville University, an MA in Counseling Psychology from Western Michigan University, and a PsyD in Clinical Psychology from The Forest Institute of Professional Psychology.
    Evan Parks, PsyD
    Licensed Clinical Psychologist
    Expert Answer
    Your bad dreams might be reflecting some area of your life that you feel you have no control over.
    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
    Thank you for your feedback.
    If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow
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      Tips

      • You are not alone. Nightmares are extremely common, affecting eighty to ninety percent of people at some point in their lives.
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      • Most often, a counselor or psychologist will help you to overcome your nightmares.
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      • Try to remember that sounds you may hear in the dream could actually be sounds you hear in your house every day.
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      Warnings

      • Nightmares that interrupt your sleep or keep you from being well rested, over a long period of time, require a visit to your doctor.
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      • If you have nightmares more than once a week, talk with your doctor.
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      References

      1. ↑ http://www.mirecc.va.gov/VISN16/docs/Sleep_Therapy_Group_Patient_Manual.pdf
      2. ↑ http://www.mirecc.va.gov/VISN16/docs/Sleep_Therapy_Group_Patient_Manual.pdf
      3. ↑ http://www.mirecc.va.gov/VISN16/docs/Sleep_Therapy_Group_Patient_Manual.pdf
      4. ↑ Evan Parks, PsyD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 26 October 2021.
      5. ↑ https://www.healthywa.wa.gov.au/Articles/N_R/Nightmares-and-flashbacks
      6. ↑ Nicole Moshfegh, PsyD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 5 August 2021.
      7. ↑ Nicole Moshfegh, PsyD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 5 August 2021.
      8. ↑ Evan Parks, PsyD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 26 October 2021.
      9. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/basics/sleep/understanding-treating-nightmares#understanding-nightmares
      1. ↑ Evan Parks, PsyD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 26 October 2021.
      2. ↑ Evan Parks, PsyD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 26 October 2021.
      3. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/conditions/nightmares
      4. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/conditions/nightmares
      5. ↑ Nicole Moshfegh, PsyD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 5 August 2021.
      6. ↑ Nicole Moshfegh, PsyD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 5 August 2021.
      7. ↑ https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/nightmare-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20353515
      8. ↑ https://www.sleepfoundation.org/dreams/how-trauma-can-affect-dreams
      9. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/conditions/nightmares
      10. ↑ https://www.hopeforthewarriors.org/art-therapy-provides-expressive/
      11. ↑ http://www.aasmnet.org/resources/bestpracticeguides/nightmaredisorder.pdf
      12. ↑ http://www.aasmnet.org/resources/bestpracticeguides/nightmaredisorder.pdf
      13. ↑ Nicole Moshfegh, PsyD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 5 August 2021.
      14. ↑ Nicole Moshfegh, PsyD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 5 August 2021.
      15. ↑ Nicole Moshfegh, PsyD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 5 August 2021.
      16. ↑ Nicole Moshfegh, PsyD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 5 August 2021.
      17. ↑ http://www.aasmnet.org/resources/bestpracticeguides/nightmaredisorder.pdf
      18. ↑ Nicole Moshfegh, PsyD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 5 August 2021.

      About This Article

      Article Summary X

      When you have a nightmare, turn on the lights and plant your feet on the floor. Use your senses to identify things in the room, like the sound of the TV, which can help remind you that the nightmare wasn't real. If your nightmares are extremely disturbing, talk with a friend or family member to get your fears off of your mind. If you can't talk to anyone, try making a dream journal where you can write about your nightmares to forget about them. For advice from our reviewer on analyzing nightmares and using image rehearsal therapy, scroll down.

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