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A bullying teacher is so much worse than a bullying student because a teacher has the power to make your life hell if you try to take revenge. Not only that, but there are more ways to avoid a bullying student (different route to classes, different seating, etc). If the teacher is petty enough to bully you, s/he is probably petty enough to torture you if you tattle on him/her. But no one should have to endure bullying, especially not from an authority figure who is supposed to be looking out for your best interest like a teacher. If you find yourself being bullied by a teacher, there are a few things you can do to deal with it.
Steps
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Try to ignore it. If you feel like you’re being bullied by a teacher, there is a possibility that you are blowing the situation out of proportion. Give yourself a little time to cool down. Ignore the teacher as much as possible without being blatantly rude and see what happens.
- Don't give it any longer than a month. Not only will you be going through unnecessary insulting, but there are usually other students who are as well. Acting within two or three weeks is best. [1] X Research source
- If the bullying continues, then you should do something about it. Try talking to the teacher about it. Let them know how you feel and ask for an explanation.
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Tell your parents. If the bullying is really bothering you, tell your parents. You might be a little nervous to talk to them about this, but just tell them what happened. Your parents will care and will want to help you. [2] X Trustworthy Source StopBullying.gov Website run by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services providing information related to identifying and preventing bullying Go to source If you feel that you aren't up to the task of bringing your teacher down, ask them to talk to him/her in your presence. There is nothing “weak” in recognizing yourself as not willing to make a teacher your direct enemy. [3] X Research source
- If you are nervous to open up to your parents, remember that they have gone through similar struggles at all the same points in life as you have. Their life experience and wisdom can be an excellent source of support when dealing with a problem as complicated as bullying. [4]
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Expert Source
Dr. Niall Geoghegan, PsyD
Clinical Psychologist Expert Interview. 24 July 2019.
Advertisement - If you are nervous to open up to your parents, remember that they have gone through similar struggles at all the same points in life as you have. Their life experience and wisdom can be an excellent source of support when dealing with a problem as complicated as bullying. [4]
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Expert Source
Dr. Niall Geoghegan, PsyD
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Start documenting the incidents. If you are being bullied by your teacher and you want this to stop, you’ll need to start gathering evidence. Every time something happens that makes you feel bad or afraid, write it down. Describe the situation, the events that happened, how it made you feel, and include the date and time of the incident. You could also try using your phone or a tape recorder to gather more evidence about the incidents. [5] X Research source
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Tell your class teacher. If you have a class teacher, do not be afraid of telling him or her. Another teacher will be better equipped than you to know what to do next. They will be able to guide you through the next steps. [6] X Research source
- If your class teacher is the one who is bullying you, tell another teacher that you are close to about the problem.
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Discuss the situation with your guidance counselor. Most schools have guidance counselors whose job it is to handle situations like this. If you are being bullied by a teacher, make an appointment with your guidance counselor to talk about it. They’ll talk to you about what the teacher is doing, how it makes you feel, and what can be done to resolve the situation. [7] X Research source
- This is also a good idea because the guidance counselor will likely know the teacher who is bullying you, so they’ll be able to give you sound advice based on their personal knowledge.
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Talk to your principal. Inform your principal about the bullying you are experiencing from a teacher. Make an appointment with your principal to talk about why this situation is upsetting you. [8] X Research source
- But remember, since informing your principal could lead to severe consequences for the teacher in question, you should only take this step as a last resort.
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Bring backup to the confrontation. If you are nervous about confronting the teacher alone, ask your parents, the principal, or another teacher to go with you when you talk to them. This should help prevent any future bullying and make you more confident about the outcome of your confrontation.
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Have evidence of bullying. If there is any evidence of the bullying, bring it with you when you confront the teacher. The stronger your case is, the more likely the teacher will be to see your side of the story (or at least they might be too scared to do it again).
- Maybe your teacher made some rude comments on one of your homework assignments. Or maybe your teacher wrote something mean about you on the board and you took a picture of it. Whatever evidence you may have to prove that you accusations are true, bring it.
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Remain calm during the confrontation. When a kid confronts an adult, the kid is usually at an immediate disadvantage due to the age difference. If you get upset and start crying hysterically, it will only confirm their suspicion that you are just an emotional child blowing things out of proportion. [9] X Research source
- If you are so upset that you cannot talk without crying or yelling, have one of the adults with you talk to the teacher for you.
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Talk directly to the teacher who is bullying you. Try doing this after class so it doesn’t make a scene, if possible. The teacher's staff room is good if the other teachers like you, but be careful: if you put the teacher in an uncomfortable position, they may take out all of their frustration on you.
- You can simply ask them outright: “Sir/Ma’am, I feel like you are bullying me and I would like to know why.”
- Try to have a calm conversation and tell them how you feel. They might not even realize that they have made you feel this way. In this case, a simple conversation should resolve your problems.
- If the teacher is defensive or denies what you say, this is when it will be good to have your parents or the principal on your side.
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Think about how your teacher’s actions make you feel. A big part of determining whether or not you are being bullied is by reflecting on how your interactions with that person make you feel. If you feel anxious, isolated, put down, humiliated, etc., then you are probably being bullied.
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Look for a pattern. Bullying happens when someone treats you poorly over and over. If your teacher makes you upset one time, that doesn’t really count as bullying. Think back over your interaction with your teacher and consider if there have been repeated instances when they made you feel bad or afraid.
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Try to recognize the difference between not getting your way and being bullied. Sometimes teachers have to discipline students or make them do things they don’t want to do. This is part of their job and isn’t considered bullying as long as they make the entire class do the same thing.
- The key here is identifying whether your teacher is singling you out and treating you differently than the other students. If your teacher is punishing only you or making mean comments to you in front of others, this is bullying.
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Consult an online checklist about whether or not you’re being bullied. There are many checklists/quizzes online that give you a list of questions to ask yourself about being bullied. If you answer yes to any of the questions, it is probable that you are being bullied.
- Try using the checklist quiz from Pacer Center’s Teens Against Bullying. [10] X Research source
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Expert Q&A
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QuestionWhat do you do when a teacher is unfair to your child?Dr. Niall Geoghegan is a Clinical Psychologist in Berkeley, CA. He specializes in Coherence Therapy and works with clients on anxiety, depression, anger management, and weight loss among other issues. He received his Doctorate in Clinical Psychology from the Wright Institute in Berkeley, CA.Remind them to stay calm, and to try not to cry or yell. This will make them look more mature and will help the other adults to believe them. Should they still feel upset, encourage them to focus on their breathing. Taking deep breaths can help them remain centered and ready to problem solve with a clearer state of mind.
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QuestionHow can I tell my parents about difficult life experiences like bullying?Dr. Niall Geoghegan is a Clinical Psychologist in Berkeley, CA. He specializes in Coherence Therapy and works with clients on anxiety, depression, anger management, and weight loss among other issues. He received his Doctorate in Clinical Psychology from the Wright Institute in Berkeley, CA.Many kids don't share their experiences with their parents out of fear that they won't listen or understand. If you don't share your authentic experience with your parents, then you will never actually find out what their genuine reaction is. Try sharing your experience with them more and remember that your parents have been through all the same struggles at all the same points in life as you have.
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Tips
- Ask your parents for help at all stages.Thanks
- Don't be disrespectful to your teacher while you are talking to them about their bullying.Thanks
- While they are bullying you, or doing what you think is bullying you, try to remain calm. If you know what they claim you are doing or need to do is untrue or the remedy (or any remedy) is unrealistic or unnecessary, just ignore them.Thanks
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Warnings
- When a principal tells a teacher about a complaint such as bullying, they will generally be nicer to the student because they know their job is on the line. Some of them will begin to bully again once they think they have been nice to their bully victims long enough to save their job. Always do what you need to do so you can save yourself and others from bullying.Thanks
- Do not try to rub it in to your teacher if you win. Be normal, as if the rivalry never took place.Thanks
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References
- ↑ http://us.reachout.com/facts/factsheet/what-to-do-if-you-are-being-bullied
- ↑ http://www.stopbullying.gov/at-risk/warning-signs/
- ↑ https://www.noodle.com/articles/is-a-teacher-bullying-your-child-heres-how-you-can-stop-it
- ↑ Dr. Niall Geoghegan, PsyD. Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview.24 July 2019.
- ↑ http://www.greatschools.org/gk/articles/when-the-teacher-is-the-bully/
- ↑ http://www.tolerance.org/magazine/number-48-fall-2014/abuse-of-power
- ↑ http://us.reachout.com/facts/factsheet/what-to-do-if-you-are-being-bullied
- ↑ http://www.webmd.com/parenting/features/teachers-who-bully?page=4
- ↑ http://www.stompoutbullying.org/index.php/information-and-resources/about-bullying-and-cyberbullying/are-you-being-bullied/
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