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A lot of relationships in middle school fizzle out quickly. Romance isn't your only focus in middle school, so how do you maintain a relationship that works for both of you, without it getting in the way of school, family, or friends? This wikiHow will help you have a good relationship in middle school.
Steps
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Be friends with your boyfriend or girlfriend first. Start a relationship from there. Hang out every now and then with him/her and a few other friends. Get to the point that you can openly talk to them about anything.- Find someone who likes you. Do they like you for you and make sure you like them the way they are.
- Find common interests. Maybe you two love to play soccer. Or maybe you two are both choir nerds. You don't have to be a cheerleader-quarterback couple. Find something that you both can share an interest in!
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Let your boyfriend or girlfriend know that you care about them. Every now and then it is good to keep updated with your crush/boyfriend/girlfriend. Be clear with your communication, an "I appreciate you" or compliment is reassuring.Advertisement -
Show affection. Hug, hold hands, go on cute dates, and maybe even a little peck on the cheek or lips on special occasions, but keep it comfortable and appropriate. If you're still trying to pursue them and you feel like holding hands or kissing, the best way may be to try to sit next to them and touch their leg or arm. You shouldn't go any further than a peck on the lips unless you're okay with it. Talk to them about what you want and are comfortable with. -
See each other places besides school. Go on a date at the mall, movies, etc. You don't have to have intense one-on-one dates. You can go with other friends and keep it casual.
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Give your boyfriend or girlfriend space to live their life. Don't stalk them but talk to them. Be casual and let whatever happens, happen. -
Be nice to your boyfriend or girlfriend's friends and family. Don't act rude to their friends. That could make them easily break up with you. Be as nice as can be but don't creep them out.- Get to know their family. This will let them know you, and chances are they'll like you, especially if you are friendly and show good manners to them.
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Look nice and keep yourself healthy. Just because you have them does not mean you can't lose them. This does not mean dress like a model every day. Just try not to wear a sweatshirt and sweatpants every day. Make sure your hair is orderly and clean.- Make sure you take care of yourself and stay healthy and hygienic. Brush and floss your teeth and use mouthwash for fresher breath. Take showers daily and wash your face every day with a cleanser and moisturize. Brush your hair.
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Protect yourself. If you suspect something is wrong. If they are cheating break up, and just be friends. Do not go back if they aren't treating you well!- You are not an adult just yet. This is a safe low-pressure environment to explore what you like and don't like in a person! It's okay to experiment; just be sensitive of their feelings.
- Take everything with a fat grain of salt. Don't listen to haters, rumor spreaders, and those immature preps asking "Hey! Did you guys make out yet?" But be wary about your partner's past, and signs your friends are seeing.
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Be yourself! Dating someone ingenuine isn't fun, then find out you're different! Be honest and it's vital to have good communication. -
Have fun! You two are still really young, so relationships should be really light-hearted and fun. Don't take everything so seriously, just go with the flow.
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Expert Q&A
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QuestionHow can my first relationship be successful?John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.Take it seriously, but not too seriously—have fun and keep it light-hearted! We learn a lot about ourselves in relationships, like how you respond to other people having an issue with your or how you respond to criticism. Ultimately, treat the relationship as a learning experience and learn how to be a person who's good in relationships, whether it's with friends or lovers.
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Tips
- Communications is vital, don't let some bad misunderstanding wreck your relationship. If you're uncomfortable with something, say it! Be vocal.Thanks
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Warnings
- Do not let your partner peer pressure you into doing things you don't want to do. Set your limits, make sure they are aware. If they don't accept it, break up. Date someone who has respect for your wishes.Thanks
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About This Article
Article Summary
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Middle school isn’t the easiest time to have a romantic partnership, but you can boost your chances of having a good relationship by doing a few simple things. Hang out with your crush in a group with other friends, which will help you get to know them as a friend and find out what you have in common. Let them know from time to time that you care about them, like by holding hands or paying them a cute compliment. Give your boyfriend or girlfriend free time to hang out with other people too, since it’s healthy to have a balanced social life. You should also spend time getting to know their friends, which will show them that you’re interested in a serious relationship. Remember that you’re both still young, so your relationship should be light-hearted and fun. If you feel under pressure or that you no longer have much in common with your partner, it’s perfectly fine to break up. For tips on how to spend time with your boyfriend or girlfriend outside of school in a low pressure setting, keep reading!
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Reader Success Stories
- "I think it helped, because it was about getting to know the other person and not dating them for the sake of dating. It's funny how some of the tips were like our parents telling us. No more than a peck, break up with them if something is wrong." ..." more
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"I think it helped, because it was about getting to know the other person and not dating them for the sake of dating. It's funny how some of the tips were like our parents telling us. No more than a peck, break up with them if something is wrong."
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"Well I guess it was just giving multiple tips on having a better relationship that helped, because me and my boyfriend are really close and see each other just about everyday. So this helped me quite a bit."
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"I followed these steps, and it allowed me to grow a stronger bond with my friend and then date. "
"Don't let other people ruin your relationship and take the fun out of it."
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