Q&A for How to Be a Good Girlfriend

Learn more about your partner by asking questions and really listening. Too often we get into conversations where we're looking for own chance to speak. However, if you can ask a variety of questions about their upbringing, likes, dislikes, wants, and needs, you can learn a lot more about them. For instance, you could ask something like "If you had unlimited money, what would you do with the rest of your life?"

Try to be as accepting as you can. For example, many men are culturally conditioned to believe that showing sadness is a sign of weakness. If your boyfriend talks about feeling sad, you could support and accept his feelings instead of judging them.

Take time to work on yourself and identify your own attachment style. For example, you might have a tendency to feel anxious and lean into your relationship, or be avoidant and lean away from your partner. Once you understand your attachment style, you can communicate it to your partner so they don't take your behavior personally.

Never control your partner, and make sure you're respecting their boundaries and their freedom.

It depends really on what you're concerned about at the moment in your relationship: Are there some "bad" habits you've developed you think could do with improvement? Things like being on time instead of always running late, texting back instead of ignoring him, or making him pay all the time instead of sharing? If so, those sorts of things are easy to fix just by thinking about what needs changing, then making the changes. Other things you can do include being more understanding, helping him out with any difficulties he might be experiencing, and trying to get along well with his friends and family. Ultimately, make an effort to share what's on your mind and be more open about what you both enjoy.

Being a girlfriend means that you're dating a guy or a girl to whom you're attracted. Generally, it's about being committed to spending time with one person exclusively and doing fun things together, sharing your life together and trusting one another. You may or may not want to get intimate with this person, whether it be kissing, holding hands or even sexual relations at some stage, that all depends on what is appropriate and right for you. Mostly other people will consider you are an exclusive (or not) couple who cares for each other in a special way. It may be a long-term thing, or it could be short lived; it is not unusual to be a girlfriend many times before finding the person you want to spend your life with.

Be considerate of his friendships and realize that they have an important place in your boyfriend's life even with you being around. This includes not resenting the time he spends with his friends. When he asks you to meet with his friends, be friendly, interested and open-minded about them. Talk to them as you would to your own friends, ask them about their interests and how long they've known your boyfriend for. Avoid flirting with any of them (a complete no-no!), don't gossip around them and avoid trying to match make any of them with your own friends. Be yourself, as it's why your boyfriend likes you. Finally though, if any of his friends seem resentful of you and you don't seem to be able to get along with them, have a chat about it with your boyfriend; he might be able to sort it out without a fuss.

A good boyfriend would have such qualities as being caring, considerate, respectful, committed and kind. He would respect your boundaries, not urge you to do anything you didn't want to do and he would be supportive of your hopes, dreams and needs. Of course, you also need to expect other qualities to vary depending on the boyfriend's own personality but these are important basics for a healthy and good relationship.

If you feel scared, limited, or controlled, he is being controlling. If you don't feel like you can be yourself around him, then you need to take a serious look at your relationship, finding help if you're worried about repercussions.