Q&A for How to Find Things to Talk About

Before the date, think about five interesting things about yourself that you'd be willing to reveal and share. One way to weave those ideas into a conversation is to ask the question you'd like to be asked yourself. Good conversation is also about sharing something a little meaningful about yourself. Some good icebreaker questions, like "what were you like in high school?" or "what would people be surprised to learn about you?" can really get the conversation going.

Sure, because it's the boring stuff that can lead you into the more interesting topics. Many conversations aren't immediately deep and fascinating—you have to ease in with small talk, then keep digging until you either hit gold or the conversation otherwise ends. Also, even talking about boring things can become enjoyable. You may be pleasantly surprised.

"I will still love you, no matter what you say."

Why not? Counselors are expert listeners, and can sense when someone wants to talk about something. Moreover, just because someone has been a fisherman their entire life doesn't mean they don't also play chess. So if a counselor was found willing to review this, it's an excellent step forward in quality. Feel free to review, edit, add anything you like - it really helps.

There are always questions. If you run out of general questions, ask about the other person's interests or hobbies. If that is done, ask about their family. Ask if they love the TV show you love. Ask if they have a sibling. Ask if they play any sport. Ask where they got that cool backpack from. Ask about literally anything around, it's fine. If the conversation is getting too dull, with too many awkward silences, it is best to leave the conversation when it still hasn't gotten stale. Make plans for a next time, and say bye.

If you find that you have bored the listener or that you have made the wrong step in a conversation, it is very important to not drag that incident out further, just change topics as smoothly as possible. Say something like, "So, enough about me, how have you been?"

It's probably not true that you have no common interests. If you're members of the same family, that's a common interest in itself. Use your imagination: you may discover several topics of interest to you both. Just the fact that you "really want to talk" to this person suggests that there may be an emotional connection between the two of you that could lead to fun and rewarding moments together.