Q&A for How to Get Out of Something

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  • Question
    How do you politely get out of a date?
    Julianne Cantarella
    Dating & Relationship Coach
    Julianne Cantarella is a Dating Coach, Certified Life Coach, Licensed Social Worker, and the CEO and President of New Jersey's Matchmaker. With over a decade of experience, she specializes in helping women heal from a heartbreak and create healthy long-term relationships. Julianne created a comprehensive transformational date coaching program From First Date to Soulmate™ that has helped hundreds of women find love. She holds a Bachelor of Social Work (BSW) from Ramapo College of New Jersey and a Master of Social Work (MSW) from Fordham University. Julianne has contributed to numerous media such as Your Tango Online Magazine, 24Seven Wellness Magazine, and Talk of The Town Magazine. She has also been featured as a relationship expert on CBS, iHeartRadio, and PBS “This Emotional Life Project.”
    Dating & Relationship Coach
    Expert Answer
    If there's no attraction and nothing in common, but the person is nice, you can be very direct. Remember, though, that being direct isn't an excuse to be rude. Just say something like, "I think you're a really great person and I know you're going to meet someone special, but I just don't think that we're a match."
  • Question
    I want to get out of gymnastics practice my mom paid for. I appreciate what she did, but I am not interested in it anymore. How do I tell her?
    Kate TheGymnast
    Community Answer
    Tell her honestly that you appreciate what she did, then after you tell her you don't want to do it, suggest other things/activities you could do in place of gymnastics practice.
  • Question
    How do I tell my family I don't want to go to dance tryouts any more?
    Community Answer
    Just calmly tell them that you don't enjoy it, and it hasn't turned out as you'd hoped.
  • Question
    How do I get out going to a party I didn't know about until the day of?
    Community Answer
    Just tell the host that the event took you by surprise and you already have plans, don't have an appropriate outfit, enough money, etc.
  • Question
    What if I want to cancel a party I said I'd throw?
    Community Answer
    Think about the reason you want to cancel. Are you just feeling uncomfortable with the idea or has something come up? If you don't want to explain yourself to your friends, you can make up an excuse about unfriendly neighbors or construction in your building. Suggest another venue for the party if possible.
  • Question
    How do I get out of talking to someone I don't like?
    Community Answer
    Use your body language and tone of voice to suggest that you are not interested in talking. Make it clear that you are ending the conversation and moving away. You can also simply state that you do not feel like talking.
  • Question
    How can I get out of doing a school play that I was never interested in being in when my parents insist that I stay in it?
    Community Answer
    All you can do is calmly and respectfully explain what you want to do and why.
  • Question
    How can I get out of doing a dance?
    Community Answer
    You can say that your back or leg hurts, or that you're coming down with a cold or anything else that would impact your balance negatively.
  • Question
    How do I tell my mom I don't want to go to the soccer game she bought me tickets for and have her listen to me?
    Community Answer
    Try telling her that you really appreciate the effort she made to get you tickets to the game. Tell her that you've realized that you don't want to go. Suggest giving the tickets away to someone who will enjoy the game.
  • Question
    What if I want to go have fun instead of doing homework
    Community Answer
    Tell your parents that you don't have a lot of homework or that you can do it quickly after the fun event. Or, ideally, just get it done really quickly first, then you can have as much fun as you want as a reward.
  • Question
    How do I get out of taking care of someone's child?
    Community Answer
    Make an excuse. The most logical thing would be to say that you have too much work, and that you can't take adequate care of the child and work at the same time.
  • Question
    How do I get out of doing something I was really enthusiastic about, but I've changed my mind about?
    Community Answer
    Follow the instructions listed in the article above.
  • Question
    How do I break a promise of something I'd said I'd do with a friend?
    TamF
    Community Answer
    Make an excuse. Say you're not feeling emotionally well. You can try to say that you're feeling down and would like to be alone because of a few problems you're facing at the moment. Or, you can pretend you're having a stomach problem.
  • Question
    How do I talk someone into going someplace they don't want to go?
    Community Answer
    Try to show all the positive reasons why they should go, how much fun it will be, what they will get out of it (either in the short or long term), etc.
  • Question
    My mom is making me go see my friend I don't like. I told her the truth but she is still making me go. I already faked sick once before and can't do it again. How do I get out of this?
    Community Answer
    If you've already talked to your mom, then try talking to someone else like another parent or a friend. Pretty much anyone will work. Ask them to talk to your mom. It's also great to come up with valid evidence that shows you really don't want to spend time with this person. If that doesn't work, then try to keep a busy schedule with "mom approved" things. Arrange to hang out with other friends during that time, do homework, or simply tell your mom you really need some time alone. Doing academic activities is a sure way to avoid seeing your friend.
  • Question
    How do I get out of performing at a school assembly?
    Community Answer
    You should really consider just doing it, even if you're nervous. Most likely a lot of people are counting on you, including your peers in the performance and the staff members that organized it. If you really can't perform, just inform someone (preferably with at least 24 hour notice) that you are ill. If it's a vocal performance, just say you have a sore throat.
  • Question
    How do I get out of going to dinner with coworkers in two weeks?
    Community Answer
    Try to make other plans. If not, just wait awhile and then tell them, maybe the morning of that you're feeling sick.
  • Question
    How do I get out of after school activities?
    Community Answer
    You could tell the person who is hosting the activities that it just isn't for you.
  • Question
    How can I get out of going to a family event?
    Madison
    Community Answer
    Family events are something that you can't really get out of, and it is also good to try to bond with your family members and make connections with them while you can. If you really want/need to get out of it, just try to explain to your parent why you don't want to go.
  • Question
    How do I say no to an outing for which I said yes just a few hours ago?
    Community Answer
    You could make up a reason like sickness or a conflicting agreement, or you could just apologize and offer to reschedule without giving a specific reason.
  • Question
    If I say I'll go visit someone in the hospital and figure out that I don't want to and don't want to seem like a bad person, how do I get out it?
    Tom De Backer
    Top Answerer
    You could just suck it up and visit quickly. Or send a card or flowers to let them know you're thinking of the person. Excuses are: "busy", "other priorities", "unforeseen circumstances" or "something else is taking up all of my time". However, since you've already said you'd visit this person, it will be disappointing if you don't make an appearance.
  • Question
    How do I get out of going to a violin group class when my mom says I have to go, even if I'm not ready?
    Tom De Backer
    Top Answerer
    You could try the honest approach: "Mom, I don't think I'm ready and I dread the violin group class, please don't make me go."
  • Question
    How can I get out of weight class?
    Madison
    Community Answer
    It depends on your age. If you are an adolescent then you honestly don't have much say in it other than having a conversation with a parent about why you don't want to go. If you are in adulthood then you make your own decisions and no one can make them for you, and if you don't want to go then you shouldn't have to.
  • Question
    How do you get out of something you begged to go to?
    Community Answer
    If you begged to go to something, you should suck it up and go. You'll probably have fun.
  • Question
    How can I get out of playing a sport?
    Community Answer
    Make up an injury.
  • Question
    How can I get out of going to something that's been planned for a while, and the organizers won't take no for an answer?
    Community Answer
    It's best to fake coming down with an illness at the last second, or tell them that a relative is sick and you need to go take care of them.
  • Question
    What is a good excuse to get out of a band contest?
    Community Answer
    Just say sorry, but you really just want to take a nap, because you are not feeling well.
  • Question
    How do I get out of going out for dinner if I'm a child?
    Tom De Backer
    Top Answerer
    If you really don't want to go, pretend to be sick, extremely tired, or simply honestly admit you don't want to. But be prepared that parents have the last say in what children do.
  • Question
    My mother wanted to go for a walk with me today. How do I get out of it?
    Community Answer
    It would be a nice thing to go on a walk with your mother, it would probably really make her happy. If you really don't want to do it though, just tell her you have homework to do or that you already made plans with a friend or sibling.
  • Question
    How do I get out of doing my Arabic Lesson?
    Community Answer
    If you are not interested, you should talk to your parents about dropping the lessons in favor of something that you do enjoy doing.
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