Q&A for How to Not Be Rude

Remember how you feel when someone is rude to you or put you down in front of other people. Remember how you felt then.... How hurt you were.... How angry you were.... How badly you wanted to get back at that person.... How much you hated him. Then, decide not to be that person.

Think before you speak. It can be hard, but force yourself to pause for 3-5 seconds before answering someone. That will give you time to think through what you intend to say and determine whether or not it's going to hurt someone's feelings or be perceived as rude.

Ask people you are talking to if you're. If they say yes, tell them that you are sorry and that you didn't mean to do it. You can also explain that you are working on correcting your rude behavior.

Yes, it sounds rude. The language is overly formal, so it also sounds snobby. A better way to express your desire to be left alone would be something like this,"I'm sorry, but I have a lot to do right now. I'm sure you have work to do yourself. Maybe we can talk more later?"

Not usually, no. It's just socially unacceptable.

Yes, it is rather rude. On the other hand, if the errands are excessive or abusive, say so and politely ask for it to stop.

No. It's never OK to be rude to anybody, especially someone who may not be doing anything intentionally annoying.

Try to cover your mouth and look behind you. It might seem awkward, but it helps. If you can't turn backwards, look to the side and yawn quietly (if possible). You could also try tucking your mouth into your elbow as you yawn to muffle the sound and make it look less obvious.

Try not to be aggressive or assertive in a way that suggests you are higher than the person you are talking to. Also take into account that trying to act 'cool' and be kind of backhanded in your body language, such as having your hands on your hips, looking down and sneering or being overly pushy and rough by standing over them and having your arms crossed tightly, can immediately rub people the wrong way. This just makes people think you are rude, domineering, and unfriendly. Also try to avoid looking both too much at them (staring), as this can make them uncomfortable, and looking not enough at them, as this can make you seem bored and them unwanted.

Being interrupted is a pet peeve of many people. Just because a behaviour is rude doesn't mean you can't fix it. Take a breath. Let them finish speaking and then say your piece. Why don't you wait? Excited to contribute to the conversation?

You will need to learn to use manners so that people off the street are not offended. Try to think of words and phrases that you can use to make people like you. Always smile at people and go out in public more to practice this.

Give the person time. You already did what you could, and the anger will likely subside with time.

Give the person some time. You already did what you could, and the anger will likely subside with time.

Try to lower the sassiness. Try to tell them that’s just how you are and you will work on it. They should understand. It's also really helpful to get friends to help you, by letting you know when you sass goes too far or just isn't smart, funny or endearing. Listen to their feedback and learn from that and over time, you'll get the balance just right.

Try to take deep breaths and remind yourself that getting mad will not help with anything.

Genuinely stop caring what people say to bring you down. Genuinely believe you're unstoppable and you are getting better every day, and work to increase the rate of getting better even more. Give them the respect for taking care of you, usually in their own ways, which we sometimes don't understand.