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Q&A for How to Talk to People when You're Shy
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QuestionHow do I make new friends when going to a new school?Community AnswerBe friendly and brave. Talk to people who smile back at you.
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QuestionHow can I overcome being a shy person when I'm unable to say anything even after spending hours with a person?Community AnswerYou could try to build up your confidence slowly. Try it with close friends, family members, or someone else you feel very comfortable with, and practice having conversations with them. Then again, it could be only a few particular persons whom you feel overly shy with, like a crush, which is a completely different case. Another point to be made, is that if the other person you were sitting with for hours doesn’t make the first move into a conversation, it could be that: A) they don't want to have a conversation, B) they too are too shy to start talking as well, or C) they are perhaps busy.
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QuestionHow do I talk to girls when I'm shy?Community AnswerJust talk to them like you would talk to any of your friends. Usually girls will keep talking if a conversation is started.
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QuestionWhy am I shy around people that I don't know?Community AnswerBecause there are a lot of uncertainties with people you don't know. You don't know what they are like, how they will react to things, whether they will like you, or what to talk to them about. It's always easier to talk to someone you already know and are comfortable with.
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QuestionHow do I become friends with someone if I'm shy?Community AnswerFirst, don't feel bad about being shy. Try to smile at someone who is friendly and has a good attitude. Come up with conversation starters ahead of time so you won't get flustered when talking to someone.
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QuestionHow can I become more confident so I can maintain my close friendships?Community AnswerKeep talking. The more you know your friends, the more comfortable you become. Then, you will eventually find yourself speaking more confidently.
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QuestionHow can I not be shy if I am in a new school?Community AnswerIf you are in a new school, relax. You won't be bullied. Just find some friends, find some similarities, and become friends. However, don't do it like you're desperate. Just do it, relaxed and calm.
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QuestionHow do I talk to a guy I have a crush on without being awkward?Community AnswerJust talk to him as if he was any friend. It may be a bit hard, but you can do it! Ask him about school, his hobbies, things you know he's interested in, etc. Remember, he's just a person, like you, there's nothing to be afraid of.
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QuestionShould I tell other people that I am shy?Community AnswerYou really don't have to, shyness usually becomes apparent through conversation with you. If a situation came up where it might have an impact, say a friend inviting you to a party where you wouldn't know a lot of people, you could explain, "I'm sorry, I don't enjoy that sort of thing, I'm too shy."
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QuestionI like a boy, because he's cute and I secretly asked him out, but he got to know it's me. He has been ignoring me since that happened. What should I do?Community AnswerTry talking to him and act like his friend again. Don't rush things with him or you could make him feel uncomfortable.
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QuestionWould it help me to practice talking to a family pet if I am very shy and even have trouble talking to family?Community AnswerSure. Pets are pretty safe, though, so move on to an actual person as soon as you feel even slightly ready.
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QuestionI can't think of anything to say when I see people. Can you give me any advice on what to say?Community AnswerTry observing what someone is into, for example if they like sports, talk about sports, or find a connection between you and them.
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QuestionWhat if I keep getting approached by people who want to talk to me, but I have nothing to say?Community AnswerI would suggest planning out things to say ahead of time. Maybe think up some questions people may ask you and write out and memorize appropriate replies, or just practice talking about common subjects like the weather, local sports, school/work, etc., either with a friend, or even by yourself. You can also ask these people about themselves, their day, etc. People like to talk about themselves.
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QuestionI have just a few friends in my class. I am not shy with them, but I am shy with other classmates, teachers, and long distance relatives. What should I do?Community AnswerTry to branch out a little bit at a time. Ask a classmate you don't normally talk to what the homework was. Smile at a stranger and say hello. If you slowly begin to interact more with others, you will gain more confidence. Keep in mind that it's okay to be a little shy. You don't need to totally overhaul your personality, just put yourself out there a little more.
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QuestionWhat should I say to people who greet me?Community AnswerJust say hello and ask them how they're doing. It would also be a good idea to give them a genuine smile to make yourself look more friendly and inviting.
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QuestionHow do I chat with one friend while others are listening?Community AnswerLike you would normally, just don't talk about anything private or anything negative about the people that are listening.
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QuestionHow can I overcome shyness and an inability to speak to my peers?Community AnswerThink about what you’re going to say, and find other people who are shy like you. This way, you will start building up confidence.
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QuestionI'm shy and an introvert. Why do I feel uncertain about what people will think about me, even though I'll probably never see them again in my life?Community AnswerIt may be a self-esteem issue. Sometimes when we don't think highly of ourselves, we think of other people as more important than we are and so worry about what they think more than we worry about our own feelings. You could likely benefit from a therapist who could help you get down to the reason you feel so poorly about yourself and help you adjust your perspective.
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QuestionHow do I tell my mom how I feel without being scared?Community AnswerYour mom should be understanding. Remember, she was a kid once, and might have experience. Lean on your mom as somebody you can trust, and know she will always love you.
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QuestionShould I be myself when I meet new people?Community AnswerOf course, you should always be yourself. You want the people you meet to like you for you.
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QuestionHow can I talk to someone I got along with in school, but haven't seen for a while? People often tease us.Community AnswerJust talk to him if you want to. Say something like, "Hey, we haven't talked in a while, I miss you. How have you been?" Don't worry about people teasing you. You shouldn't let the behavior of immature people bother you.
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QuestionHow do I talk to a family member I've never seen before when I'm shy?Community AnswerIt depends on who they are. Saying "Hi, how are you," and "It's nice to meet you" are pretty standard in that situation. If the person is older and you're a kid/teen, they will probably just ask you about school and you're interests, and all you have to do is politely answer their questions.
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QuestionHow do I start conversations with simple questions when I'm shy?Community AnswerIt can be hard. You feel like it’s the end of the world. But really, it’s just casual questions people ask every day. And maybe it wasn’t as bad as as you thought it would be. Gain confidence and try asking these questions once in a while. You will get better. You can start of slowly, then try talking more. But, don’t rush things, take it at a nice tempo for you; you can start off with a classmate, client or your neighbor.
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QuestionThere's a new kid at school and I’m not sure how to talk to them because I’m shy, but I was also the new kid before them. How do I go about that?Community AnswerTry to slowly approach them, a smile or a wave goes a long way. After awhile, you’ll have the courage to talk to him/her. Figure out what they like and find common ground, that way it will be easier to start a conversation.
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QuestionWhat do I do if I'm scared of talking to people?Community AnswerIt’s like a phobia. You need to conquer your fear at some point. I am a super shy in person, but online, I’m a totally different person. I try to find people i can talk to online, figure out what I would say to them, then use whatever I’ve learned on my own to talk to living humans. It’s awkward at first, but it’s better than thinking the worlds going to end at every word you say...
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