How to Give a Romantic Hug to a Girl

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Hug a lady to drive her wild and make her remember you
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When is a hug more than a hug? How do you give a woman a hug that will leave her wanting more? It’s all about passion, chemistry, and the small touches. We talked to professional dating coaches to show you how to go in for the hug, different romantic hugs to give, and how to really spice it up.

Giving a Romantic Hug

Start the hug with small touches that signal your intentions, like holding her hand. Then, move in close, watching her body language for signs she wants it. If she does, gently wrap your arms around her waist, pulling her close to you, and hold the hug for about 10 seconds.

Section 1 of 5:

Initiating the Hug

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  1. Dating coach Imad Jbara says a really romantic hug is intimate. [1] One way to up the intimacy is to make sure you’re alone together. Create a comfortable level of privacy so that the two of you can be fully present in your intimacy. It helps if no one is going to barge in on you, and that you won't disturb anyone else with your romantic hug. You don't want to rush this.
    • If you can’t be alone, though, that’s okay! You can still give her a hug that sweeps her off her feet when you’re in public.
  2. For a truly romantic hug, it’ll be much easier to make the hug romantic if you are both already standing upright. [2] Hug her when you are greeting or saying goodbye – during any transitional scene when you both happen to be standing. If you're going for a longer, deeper hug, then make sure that you have at least a few minutes.
    • If you aren't standing, wait for a better time, like when you’re leaving the date or walking somewhere together. Or, just ask her for a hug !
    • If one of you cannot stand for some reason, then you should at least be sitting next to one another without any barriers between you. Sit on the ground, on a bench, or on a bed.
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  3. It’s not a good idea to romantically hug a woman who is not romantically interested in you. A romantic hug is an intimate move, and it may not be well-received before she is ready. “Be aware of their expression,” dating coach Cher Gopman says, and look for other clues that she might not be comfortable with physical touch yet. [3]
    • For example, if you move close and she hesitates or backs away, that’s a red light.
    • On the other hand, if the two of you have been flirting and she often leans in closer, that’s a green light.
    • Also, if she’s a coworker or someone you don’t know very well (and you aren’t on a date), it’s probably not a good idea to make a move on her like this. [4]
  4. 4
    Start slowly with other small touches. This helps put you both in the right mood. Start by holding her hand , or placing your hand on her shoulder or the back of her neck. [5] “Subtle touches are okay if she’s giving you the signs,” dating coach Laura Bilotta says. “Touch her on the leg, on the back, be gentle and soft.” [6]
    • This helps get you both comfortable with a romantic, intimate touch.
    • Remember to pump the brakes if she pulls away or seems uncomfortable. You can always hug when you’re more familiar and comfortable together.
  5. Once you’re touching and comfortable, wrap your arm under hers and rest your hand on the general area of her shoulder blade. As the hug deepens, you can hold her waist or wrap both arms around the small of her back. [7]
    • Alternately, hug her from behind. Wrap your arms around her torso or waist, and hold her tight. Let her head rest comfortably against your chest.
    Gary Chapman, Relationship Counselor & Bestselling Author

    Physical touch is a powerful way to express love in romantic relationships. When hugging your partner, move slowly, gaze into her eyes, and gently yet firmly wrap your arms around her. Channel the passion and affection you feel and let the hug communicate your deep care for this special woman.

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Section 2 of 5:

Types of Romantic Hugs to Give

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  1. This is the hug you’ve done a million times, just a little tighter and a little longer. Wrap your arms under hers, pull her close, and rest your head on her head, or on her shoulder. [8] Make it gentle but firm, to make her feel safe and secure in your arms.
    • Avoid doing the criss-cross hug, where one of your arms is over her shoulder and the other is under her other shoulder. This tends to be much more casual, like you’re just friends.
  2. 2
    Neck Hugs This is a great hug when she’s shorter than you. [9] Before you hug her, take her hands and wrap them around your neck. Hold her waist, or wrap your arms around her, under her own arms, like you’re slow dancing.
    • Then, sway back and forth a little, rest your forehead on hers, and enjoy the moment.
  3. 3
    Side Hugs A side hug is perfect for when you’re walking together, or sitting side-by-side and you can’t hug normally, like while watching a movie. [10] Just raise your arm and drape it behind her head and across her shoulders, pulling her close so that you touch at the hips.
    • For an extra sweet hug, kiss her on the forehead as you pull her close.
  4. 4
    Hug from Behind A hug from behind is a fun way to mix things up. [11] It’s a cute way to surprise her if you’re already close to her, or to enjoy a moment together, like when you’re at a concert. Surprise her by wrapping your arms around her waist from behind and resting your head on her shoulder or the top of her head.
    • Or, start with a side hug, then slide behind her to gracefully transition to a hug from behind.
    • Don’t surprise a girl you don’t know very intimately. It probably won’t be a welcome surprise!
  5. 5
    The Dip A dip is actually a setup for a steamy, romantic kiss, so only use it if you plan to lock lips. To do it, wrap your dominant arm around her so that your hand supports her upper back. Place your other hand on her waist, or in her hand. Then, spin her to the side and guide her into a small, easy dip. Look into her eyes, then give her a kiss! [12]
    • It’s important not to dip her too far, which can be uncomfortable and also unstable. Just a slight angle works!
  6. 6
    The Long Goodbye Jbara says that a longer hug can really up the intimacy. [13] Plus, when you’re saying goodbye, like after a date, a long hug gives her something to remember you by. There’s nothing to it, really, just hug her like you normally would, then when you feel the urge to pull away, separate your bodies for a moment, smile, then pull her right back into the hug.
    • This shows her that you just don’t want to say goodbye, and that you love spending time with her, so much that you don’t want her to leave your arms. You need just a little more.
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Section 3 of 5:

Making it More Romantic

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  1. Gaze deeply and longingly into her eyes , and use the warmth of the hug to show her how you feel about her. Give her a warm, wide smile to show her that you’re totally comfortable. Squeeze her tightly enough to show her that you care, but not so tightly that you hurt her at all. The affection ups your oxytocin, which is a positive brain chemical that makes you both feel good! [14]
    • Be confident . Don't hesitate to show her how you feel. It will be better for both of you if you go into the hug feeling comfortable with one another.
    • Try not to be self-conscious . Focus only on the moment and on her.
  2. Jbara says “a little harder grip” can boost the chemistry between you. [15] Pull her towards you and squeeze. Not too hard, or you'll hurt her, but firm enough that you both feel secure. Slowly rub your hands up and down her back. Don't be afraid to explore with your hands, but make sure that she's into it.
    • If you know each other well enough, then you may be brave enough to go towards her butt. Squeeze a cheek gently but firmly, and then let go – just enough to tease her.
    Gary Chapman, Relationship Counselor & Bestselling Author

    Physical touch is a powerful way to express love in romantic relationships. When hugging your partner, move slowly, gaze into her eyes, and gently yet firmly wrap your arms around her. Channel the passion and affection you feel and let the hug communicate your deep care for this special woman.

  3. Whispering gently gets her heart pounding! Tell her how she makes you feel, or how much you want her. Tell her that you love her), or that she's beautiful. Use a low, sexy voice, and make sure that she hears every word.
    • Say something like, “You’re the most incredible person I’ve ever met,” or, “You’re the only one for me.”
  4. Gopman reminds us to read the signs and make sure she’s on board. [16] If she’s enjoying it, take the next step! Give her a passionate kiss. If you’re in the bedroom, guide her to a comfortable surface. Sit her down on your lap while slowly turning her head towards yours. Kiss her passionately while still rubbing her back with your arms, and give her a little massage. Intensify the kiss as you slowly put her underneath you.
    • A romantic hug can lead to much more if the two of you are comfortable being intimate with one another. Just make sure that you're both ready.
    • Always ask for consent. Before each move that you make to escalate the situation, ask her casually for permission. Say, for instance, "Do you mind if I take off your dress?" Try stating what you want, and giving her opportunity to say what she wants: "I want to make out on the bed. Is that something you want to do?" [17]
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Section 4 of 5:

How long should a romantic hug last?

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  1. Hug for about 10 seconds, but go with the flow. Research shows that a good hug usually lasts about 10 seconds. But if you’re both enjoying yourselves, it can last much longer, like a few minutes! It’s all about doing what feels right. [18] The moment you’re starting to question it, though, that’s your sign to let go.
Section 5 of 5:

How do you know when a hug is romantic?

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  1. Jbara says that the grip and duration have a lot to do with it. [19] Think about a hug you give a friend. It’s usually just a few seconds, and you’re not leaning into it all the way. A romantic hug, though, is one with chemistry, tension, and excitement. You linger for a few moments. Check out our full list of signs that hug is romantic for more vital clues.
    • Also, there are usually other small touches, like holding hands, cupping chins, or caressing skin.
    • Eye contact is also a big sign. If you hold eye contact before and after the hug, it’s a sign you’re both hoping it meant something —and it probably did.
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  • Question
    Can I kiss a woman when I'm hugging her romantically?
    Community Answer
    It depends on the situation and the person. Don't kiss her unless you're certain you have her consent to do so.
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  • Question
    How do I hug a girl in front of her parents?
    Nico
    Top Answerer
    Hugging a girl in front of her parents may not be a good idea, as her parents may be more strict. If you do hug her in front of her parents, make it a simple hug that lasts no more than 3 seconds; otherwise, it will appear romantic.
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  • Question
    Can i hug her while stroking her hair?
    Max Wolf
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    Yes, especially if you know her well. Most girls love it when people play with their hair, unless they took a long time styling it or if they have curly or coiled hair. If you're not sure, just ask! "Your hair looks so soft and silky. May I touch it?
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      References

      1. ↑ Imad Jbara. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 22 September 2021.
      2. ↑ https://www.glamour.com/story/how-to-give-him-a-hug-that-let
      3. ↑ Cher Gopman. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 17 May 2019.
      4. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-asymmetric-brain/202206/10-things-that-make-a-hug-great
      5. ↑ https://www.glamour.com/story/how-to-give-him-a-hug-that-let
      6. ↑ Laura Bilotta. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 26 February 2020.
      7. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201603/7-basic-rules-hugging
      8. ↑ https://www.glamour.com/story/how-to-give-him-a-hug-that-let
      9. ↑ https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC11190144/
      1. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-asymmetric-brain/202206/10-things-that-make-a-hug-great
      2. ↑ https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC11190144/
      3. ↑ https://youtu.be/Nrkf0V7MYPA?si=BP1GCSXLhtgxHw3b&t=14
      4. ↑ Imad Jbara. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 22 September 2021.
      5. ↑ https://www.pennmedicine.org/updates/blogs/health-and-wellness/2018/february/affection
      6. ↑ Imad Jbara. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 22 September 2021.
      7. ↑ Cher Gopman. Relationship Coach. Expert Interview. 17 May 2019.
      8. ↑ https://www.usf.edu/student-affairs/victim-advocacy/resources/importance-of-consent.aspx
      9. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-asymmetric-brain/202206/10-things-that-make-a-hug-great
      10. ↑ Imad Jbara. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 22 September 2021.

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