“Hi Grace, can I talk to you for a few minutes?” Sure. What’s going on? “Lately I’ve been feeling like I’m getting a shorter and shorter fuse. Last night I got so frustrated at Brian that I started yelling at him and had to leave for a while. We both got really upset and I don’t know how to fix it. And this has been happening in other places too. I’ve been getting upset at work at the smallest setbacks and it’s getting harder and harder not to yell at my coworkers.” You’ve always had a pretty quick temper. “Yeah, but this is more than that. I feel like I can’t control myself, and it’s scary.” Are you under a lot of stress or something? I know I can start snapping at people when I have a lot of work. “Yeah, I kind of am. We have a couple of big projects going on at work. I feel like I never have enough time, and when people get in the way then I have even less.” I mean, it’s normal to get frustrated sometimes when you’re busy and stressed. But I’m guessing you don’t want to feel like you’re about to explode all the time. “Yeah, exactly. I’ve been trying to take deep breaths and count to 10 and all that when I get angry, but it just feels like I’m shoving the anger down and it’ll come up later, even worse.” Yeah, you probably need a way to let it out that doesn’t involve yelling or anything, something more...constructive. “That’s kind of why I’m talking to you about it. Do you have any ideas?” Well… first I’d say that if you feel yourself getting angry, you should just walk away for a while. Sometimes just moving around can snap me out of it when I’m really frustrated. “Can I call you, too? If I need to vent?” Yeah, of course. If I’m at work or something, though… “Maybe I can try to write it down or something.” Yeah, that could be good. Just finding a way to get it out of your system. OK. Maybe those will help. Yeah, just give them a try. But be patient with yourself, too. It’s OK if things don’t work perfectly at first, just think of it as an exploration, kind of. You’re experimenting with different methods and not every single one is gonna be effective, but the important part is that you’re trying. “Thank you. I really appreciate being able to talk to you about this.” Of course. I’m here anytime you need.