All the Best Ways to Make Your Boyfriend Obsessed with You

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Make your boyfriend want you more with these helpful dating tips
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Whether you’re in a new relationship or you’ve been with your guy for years, keeping him interested and passionate about you helps the relationship grow and deepen. We talked to relationship therapists and experts to show you how to grow closer, how to make yourself irresistible to him, and how to show him that you’re just as crazy about him as he is about you.

Driving Him Wild

  1. Give him small compliments each day.
  2. Catch his attention with small, tender touches.
  3. Kiss him a bit more passionately than usual.
  4. Let him chase you, but don’t play games.
  5. Respect his personal space and independence.
  6. Hold eye contact to crank up the chemistry.
  7. Dress up sometimes to keep things interesting.
Section 1 of 3:

Deepening Your Relationship

  1. Proximity has been found to increase feelings that people have for each other. The more that you see someone, the more likely you are to bond to that person, and the deeper your bond will be. [1] Make yourself available, and find ways to stay near him.
    • Drop by his work now and then, or stop by his locker or class just to say hi.
    • Don’t hesitate to have low-key date nights, where you just hang out on the couch or in the same room together. Quiet time is valuable!
    • Of course, don’t be too clingy. Be around, but don’t follow on his heels.
  2. Dating coach John Keegan tells us that space is key, and that if you feel some distance, don’t go scrambling to cling to him. Give him some breathing room . Make sure that you give him a chance to miss being with you all the time. Some of the initial spark and passion may fizzle out because you get too comfortable with each other, but that’s natural. You want him to miss you, but you also want him to know that he isn’t your sole source of happiness.
    • Make plans to hang out independently with your own friends, and encourage him to do the same with his friends.
    • Leading your own lives also gives you something to talk about when you do spend time together.
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  3. Research shows that mirroring someone’s movements or habits can increase their feelings of attraction for you. [2] We naturally pick up the habits of the people we love, and seeing each other do those habits can deepen that love. For example:
    • Try sitting in the same pose he likes to sit.
    • Pick up his usual sayings and say them yourself sometimes. Like, if he always says, “That’s neat,” you might drop the phrase in conversation now and then.
    • Try to be subtle about this. Mirroring often happens without people noticing they are doing it, and it is important to avoid making it too obvious or it might seem strange.
  4. Even though you are already dating, you can increase your partner’s desire for you by playing hard to get. [3] If you keep it playful and light, he’ll get the message and put in a little more effort to woo you. Some easy ways to play hard to get with your boyfriend include:
    • Waiting 15 minutes to respond to a non-urgent text or missing a call every so often.
    • Puckering for a kiss, but making him close the distance.
    • Being flirty , but making him initiate intimacy.
  5. Revealing things about yourself brings you closer to your boyfriends and deepens your feelings for each other. Tell him all about yourself, including your interests, your goals, and your family. [4] Be careful not to reveal too much too soon, though. Keeping some aspects of your life, goals, and feelings can add mystery to your relationship, which may help to increase his interest in you.
    • When he asks you questions about yourself, be honest and answer them as best they can, so long as you’re comfortable.
    • Encourage him to open up, too, by asking him questions about himself, like: What was your childhood like? If you could go back and do something different, what would it be?
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Section 2 of 3:

Being Irresistible

  1. 1
    Make eye contact to boost the tension. Keegan recommends using eye contact to let him know you’re wild about him. Eye contact can be an intense and intimate thing, and if you hold his eye contact now and then, sparks will fly. To really drive him wild, bite your lip, grin, or wink at him before you look away.
    • Aim to hold eye contact for about 5-7 seconds at a time, or more if you feel comfortable.
  2. It’s a scientific fact that confidence is a super sexy quality for most people, so feel free to be your most confident when you are with your boyfriend. [5] You can demonstrate your confidence by doing things like sharing your accomplishments and acknowledging your strengths.
    • Some great ways to act confident include looking people in the eye, asserting yourself, accepting and giving compliments , and focusing on your goals and passions.
    • Keep in mind that some people find confidence a little intimidating. If your boyfriend has low self-confidence, then projecting your confidence may not increase his desire for you. [6]
    EXPERT TIP

    John Keegan

    Dating Coach
    John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.
    John Keegan
    Dating Coach

    Don't worry if you're not confident yet—it'll come with practice. The more you interact with others, the more comfortable you'll become. Start small, even with a simple wave or a smile. Consistent practice will help open the door to richer connections!

  3. Your boyfriend may have some specific things that attract him, so relationship expert Elvina Lui tells us to pay attention to what he finds attractive or sexy, and work from there. If he tells you he likes something you do or say, take note. Perhaps your boyfriend loves lingerie , or maybe he thinks you look sexiest right after a workout. Some things that might help include:
    • Wearing light makeup . Makeup isn’t for everyone, and that’s okay! But if it’s something you enjoy, then you’re in luck. Eye makeup has been shown to make women seem more attractive to some men. [7] Try wearing some eyeliner or eyeshadow and mascara when your boyfriend is around.
    • Using unscented or lightly scented products on your body . It is important for your boyfriend to be able to smell your natural scent. This scent can help him to experience strong feelings of attraction. [8] Try wearing unscented deodorant and using unscented bath products so that your boyfriend can smell your natural scent.
    • Wearing red clothing now and then . One study found that men are more attracted by the color red than any other color. [9] Get a red dress or sweater to wear on a date with your boyfriend and see what happens.
  4. 4
    Casually flirt with him to keep up the chemistry. Keegan recommends flirting with physical touch to stoke the fires of attraction. Hold his hand, run your hand through his hair, or gently stroke his arm. These small touches show him that you’re wild about him, and stimulate his senses to make sure he’s always happy to see you.
    • Also, offer him lots of warm smiles , and laugh often. When he sees that you’re comfortable, he’ll be more comfortable.
  5. In addition to being sexy and desirable, another great way to drive your boyfriend wild is to just be a fun-loving person. You want him to want to hang out with you, and showing him that you are the type of person who is up for a good time is a great hook. [10] Don’t try to be someone you’re not, but know that there are a lot of ways to have a good time. Some ideas include:
    • Go for a hike and race him to the top for the last leg. Laughing through a competitive situation will bond you and endear you to him.
    • Go out to watch a sports game with him and his friends and impress them with your knowledge of the game.
    • Play a game of truth or dare to show him you can be silly and fun.
  6. Kissing is one of the ways that we evaluate our partners, so being a good kisser is really important. Kissing can also help to improve your boyfriend’s feeling of attraction and connection to you. To be a good kisser , try to keep some things in mind: [11]
    • It’s okay to start off a kiss with your mouth closed and move into a more passionate kind of kiss if the mood is right.
    • Make sure your teeth are clean and your breath is fresh before you attempt a kiss.
    • Focus on him and nothing else when you are kissing. Being distracted while kissing can be a big turn-off.
    • Try touching the back of his head or neck or stroking his arm while you kiss. These extra touches can be a great way to enhance a kiss.
    • Reader Poll: We asked 124 wikiHow readers how they like to show love to their partner, and 50% of them said through physical affection. According to our readers, giving him a warm hug or passionate kiss is a great way to make him feel loved. [Take Poll]
  7. 7
    Dress up sometimes, even if there’s no occasion. Licensed relationship therapist Alysha Jeney reminds us that “spontaneity is always really romantic.” One easy way to be spontaneous is to surprise your boyfriend by dressing up or wearing something that makes you feel confident and sexy. That little surprise in his day keeps things interested, and makes him go wild.
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Section 3 of 3:

Making Him Feel Desired

  1. Complimenting your boyfriend is an important way to help him feel appreciated and loved . By complimenting him, you show him that you accept him as he is and that you like the things that he says and does. [12] Praise him and show your admiration when he achieves big things, but also for the small things. For example:
    • “Wow, that was an amazing kiss.”
    • “You looked so sexy and manly out there cutting the grass.”
    • “You were so good in the game today; it’s such a turn-on watching you play.”
  2. Jeney tells us that a little spontaneity and surprise goes a long way. She suggests making surprise dinner plans, or asking him if he’d like to go somewhere fun on short notice, like the museum or the zoo. Spontaneity can help break up your normal routine and show him that you feel crazy about him, inspiring him to go crazy over you. Be flirty and live in the moment at all times, and he will always feel excited to be around you. Here are some more spontaneous ideas:
    • If you normally watch his favorite sports team at home, surprise him with tickets or take him out to a local restaurant with huge TVs to watch the game instead.
    • Make him some kind of food neither of you has ever had.
    • Give him surprise gifts, like flowers.
  3. Lui tells couples to “be the biggest supporters of each other, giving constant encouragement and validation.” One huge part of sparking desire in your partner is helping him feel good about himself. Encourage him in his goals like you would encourage a friend. Make sure that he knows that you are there for him and that you support him.
    • For example, if your boyfriend is worried about a job interview, encourage him by saying something like, "You are going to be great! They would not have called you for an interview if they did not already think you were a good choice for the job!"
    • Also offer to help him when you can, and when he wants it. For example, if he has a big event coming up, wake up early that day to make him breakfast or drive him there to show him you’re invested, too.
  4. 4
    Listen to his hopes, concerns, and thoughts. “Make him feel like you really hear him, make him feel like you're getting him,” Keegan says. When he talks, pay attention. Put down your phone and make eye contact. Ask him follow-up questions, or ask him how you can help. When he feels seen and heard, he knows that he can come to you with his thoughts, and he’ll keep coming back.
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Take Your Relationship to the Next Level with this Expert Series

If you really want to drive your boyfriend crazy (in the best way) we have the perfect expert series for you. These articles will help you make sure your boyfriend is absolutely obsessed.
1
Flirt With Your Boyfriend
2
Be Flirty With Your Boyfriend at School
3
Be Playful with Your Boyfriend
4
How to Drop Hints to a Boy That You Like Him
5
12 Ways to Impress a Guy on a Date
6
All the Best Ways to Make Your Boyfriend Obsessed with You

Expert Q&A

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  • Question
    How do you make your boyfriend want you more?
    John Keegan
    Dating Coach
    John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.
    John Keegan
    Dating Coach
    Expert Answer
    Do exciting things and share them online. Make yourself a fun person to be around by doing exciting things and then post about them on social media. Your boyfriend will want to be a part of that life.
    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
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    Yes No
    Not Helpful 14 Helpful 17
  • Question
    How can I make my boyfriend crazy about me?
    John Keegan
    Dating Coach
    John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.
    John Keegan
    Dating Coach
    Expert Answer
    Ask him questions about himself. Show him you’re curious about his life or his day by asking questions. You’ll make your boyfriend feel seen, which can make him crazy about you. Being a good listener also makes your boyfriend feel heard and understood.
    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
    Thank you for your feedback.
    If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow
    Yes No
    Not Helpful 10 Helpful 28
  • Question
    How do I make my boyfriend's guy friends jealous when I'm around them?
    Chy_2
    Community Answer
    This is when you show him how much you love him, but don't change who you are. If you two are typically a quiet couple, don't go all loud and obnoxious, stay simple and subtle. Hold onto his arm or stand closer to him. Your actions should scream "He's mine!" without actually screaming it. They will see how you treat him and want a girl like you for themselves.
    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
    Thank you for your feedback.
    If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow
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      • Only act in a way that you are comfortable with. You are not obligated in any way to do anything to or with your boyfriend that you are uncomfortable with or not ready for.
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      • Always be genuine and true to yourself. If you find that you have to fake your personality with your boyfriend, he might not be the most compatible. Try to find someone who goes crazy over you when you are being yourself.
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      References

      1. ↑ https://sites.psu.edu/aspsy/2022/11/07/close-proximity/
      2. ↑ http://link.springer.com/article/10.1023/A:1022986608835
      3. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201403/when-should-you-play-hard-get
      4. ↑ https://www.mind.org.uk/for-young-people/how-to-get-help-and-support/getting-ready-to-open-up/
      5. ↑ https://spsp.org/news-center/character-context-blog/attractiveness-confidence
      6. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/maybe-its-just-me/201310/does-everyone-find-confidence-attractive
      7. ↑ https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1046/j.1467-2494.2003.00188.x/abstract;jsessionid=56CFE2372347EF6DBE2FD1F49E2AE01C.f01t03
      8. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/articles/200801/scents-and-sensibility
      9. ↑ https://fashionandtextiles.springeropen.com/articles/10.1186/s40691-021-00279-0
      1. ↑ https://spsp.org/news-center/character-context-blog/attractiveness-confidence
      2. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201111/why-we-kiss-and-how-to-do-it-right
      3. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/having-sex-wanting-intimacy/201410/what-do-men-need-women-5-insights

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